My husband and I have 2 girls--almost 4 and almost 7. While we thought we were done having children, we have changed our minds. I'm super-excited but am a little concerned about the age difference. We're hoping to have a little one next spring, so the older kids will be 8 and 5 years older than the baby. Have you been in this situation, and if so, how did the older kids handle it? How did it change your family dynamic and routine--positive and negative?
I'm with Jen, mine are 5, 2, and 1. Any new addition will shake it up for you. Doesnt matter when and how many. Sound like a great gap between them all. At least you wont be cleaning one's tush when you hear #2 start a grunting and pooping all over. Or all three going into scream fests!!!
Congrats on the decision and good luck!!
Well I can only respond to half your question bc my kids are 4, 2 and 3 months. But as to how did it change the routine, it annihilated it!!!!! But now everyone is finding their groove and adjusting so great and the baby is just soooooooooooooooooooooooooo cute!!!!!! Like every day when I still can't put away the laundry I just go make goo-goo eyes at the baby and move on!! Congrats, the third is nuts but also very wonderful :D
Our first two were 6 and 7 when the 3rd was born and it was too big a gap but they did accept the baby fine and were a big help to the others that came after that. I don't think 5 years is too big a gap if you want another one. A baby is to love no matter age spans or number of children, etc. Your family will change but I would guess for the better not the worse. Adjustment for all involved but it will be fun for the kids and they will be old enough to be great help to you and will enjoy the baby.
At those ages they are immersed in their own lives so a new baby isn't
much of an impact, especially girls. They become little mothers, then
get bored and move on to their friends. You will enjoy this baby in ways
you did not get to enjoy the others. You now realize that if things do not
get done, the world will not end. Sure there will be moments that you think,
what did we do, but they will be far and few between. Good luck.
My son was 4 when we had our second and they get along great! I was worried about spacing them out that far on if they would be close or not, but I think it worked out perfect! I also am glad we planned it out the way we did so your not paying for a car or college at the same time and I feel we are able to give them more by doing it this way. Good Luck!
My kids were 6 (son) and 4 (daughter) when I had their twin sisters. They were very happy to have them and looked forward to doing whatever the could to help with the babies. It has been just fine. Now the twins are almost 3 and the big kids are 7 & 9 and they all play together and get along great. Our routine wasn't negatively impacted. Best wishes.
My boys are 4 and 6... and we are expecting our 3rd (a girl). The kids are so excited and the age difference isn't that great to us. They are old enough to play with her and to also help.
Some things will depend on the personalities of your kids. My 8 yr old son adores his little sister so much he wants to marry her. He is much more tolerant of her than he was at 2 yrs old when his brother was born. Some of that comes from his added maturity, some is his personality, and some is just his relationship with her. Our routine changed completely when our 3rd was born, but that was fine because my boys had grown in their understanding of the concept that families make sacrifices to support one another. I liked that my boys were old enough to get themselves ready for bed or get their own breakfast if the baby needed me more than usual at those times. The 3rd baby got less attention from me than the first baby got for sure. But on the plus side she got lots of attention from her brothers to make up for it. One of the hardest parts was toting her around town when she did not want to be in the car. Or getting her up in the middle of a nap. If it was time for another family member to be somewhere, we didn't have the luxury of working around the baby's schedule. We just had to get in the car and go, letting her cry until I could give her the attention she wanted/needed. The boys worked hard at calming her in the car, but there have been plenty of times that my younger son got fed up and hit her or just broke down crying because he couldn't stand the noise. A few times I even had to nurse her only on one side, stop to get one of the boys to or from school or pick up their dad from work, then when we got home I would finish nursing her on the other side. You'll probably have a kindergartener when the baby is born, which typically means half day school. It's annoying to have to pack up the baby to take the kindergartener to and from school, but with some good planning, it can be done. Your routines will all change a bit, but there can be a lot of joy for the whole family in making room in your lives and hearts for a new little family member, no matter your ages. Good luck and God bless!
We are facing a similar issue since we've just decided to go for it & have baby number two. Our son will be 5 in May and since we're trying next month, the gap will be about 6 years. I'm just praying & having my baby. As with some of the other ladies, I'm sure there will be issues, but since we kind of know what to expect, go on and have your little one. :-) And also, the older kiddos will be great mommy helpers too! Congrats & God Bless! ;-)
~ Chel
I think most people already covered it with changes unavoidable but usually everyone will get used to the changes. I was 11.5 years and my younger sister was almost 8 years when our youngest sister was born. Being older I think there were many times I played at being "mommy" and was the typical older, bossy sister. My middle sister and younger sister have more in common personality wise which created some issues. Although they tended to argue more it was something we all tried to work out and eventually it did get better. Now my youngest sister is 16 and she gets along with both of us great and loves having two older sisters. I'm sure that no matter what happens your kids will adjust to the idea and love their little sister or brother once he/she comes along. It will add to the chaos but that may depend on personalities of each and your organization level. My mom was definitely older when my sister was born and she was the most stubborn, determined, hard headed etc of all of us which was a change. It took a long time for my mom to figure out what would work with her. Good luck though!:)
My DD is 18; thought I was done then she turned 12 and we decided to have our now 3 y/o. Then god surprised us with our now 2 y/o. Our 18 y/o loved the new additon then our DS came along and she felt left out of the "new family" this has since resolved and she is a huge help when she is home. My routine has been turned upside down but it gets better daily
