18 Month and Nap Time

Updated on April 25, 2008
E.G. asks from Deland, FL
10 answers

I can' tget my 18 month to sleep without rocking her, problem i have a new born who needs to be held 80% of the time, any ideas????? Ithought trying to give her Chamile tea, b/c wearing her out doesn't work, it makes her more cranky. Help me!

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B.R.

answers from Orlando on

I believe my next door neighbor girls are 18 months apart. And she got them on the same sleep schedule. Perhaps that's something to try.

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J.W.

answers from Panama City on

I agree with the other posters. Crying it out is appropriate for an 18 month old. Don't try to wear her out. Make sure she goes down for a nap (or bed) at the same time each day and before she gets overly tired. Babies sleep better and longer when they are not overly tired. Just simply tell her -in 5 minutes, you will be going down for a nap. You will likely hear some "no's". Five minutes later, tell her that it is nap time, you love her, and that you will see her in a couple of hours and then put her in her bed and close the door. She may cry the entire nap time for the first couple of days. But you must leave her for the entire nap time. You are the mom. You decide when she goes down and when she gets up. She will likely only cry for a couple of days and then she will get the routine and will actually enjoy taking naps because it makes her feel rested. I have a 21 month old daughter and this is what we have done. She still tells me no when I tell her that it will soon be nap time because she realizes now that she is missing out on things when she goes to sleep (playing) - but then picks up her toys and runs to her room telling me - "bed". So, it may be a hard couple of days but in the end, you will be thankful and so will she.

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R.M.

answers from Daytona Beach on

E.,
let her cry it out. i had to do it and after a couple of days it's totally worth it!

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J.S.

answers from New York on

Sounds mean but she is going to have to learn at some point to fall asleep by herself. You need to start putting her in her crib after a routine of the same thing every day (book, cup of milk, water or juice) bath ect... and saying goodnight and that mommy will see you when you wake up. I have a 20 month old and started it when she was 12 months. It actually only took a couple hard days. Now my daughter fights it and it sometimes can take her an hour to fall asleep. She may run around in her crib or talk to herself or play with her doll that she sleeps with. She does although fall asleep. If you take her out one time she will know that you'll do it again so stick to your guns! You can do it! Good luck! J.

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C.B.

answers from Orlando on

E.,
LIttle Tikes are so smart, so if you have always rocked her, of course that is ALL she wants. So in order to change her habits you created...you must CHANGE it. It will be much tougher...but you have to learn to allow her to "learn" how to sooth her self....put her down and let her cry it out. IF you do this early, its much less painful and they adjust with in one or two weeks...at 18 months....may take much longer and standing firm to your decision. but you will be so thankful you "bit the bullet" and did it. And it will give her such a security...its a beautiful thing! I have five, it definitely works and YOU need it! Nothing like dreading the "fight" of bed time..so change it and then it becomes so enjoyable for ALL!

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K.W.

answers from Panama City on

Ask her doc. Don't give any herbs or vits w/out asking. Can be deadly. Please be careful!

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B.B.

answers from Jacksonville on

HAve your husband take the newborn or rock your other daugther to sleep. You don't want too much change once the baby comes home otherwise she will associate it with the baby. YOu should have either stopped the rocking a few months before the baby was born or wait a few months. Plus, babies don't need to be held 80% of the time. With 2 children close in age you need to separate your time better. My two are 19mths apart. I would always put the newborn down when she was a sleep to spend more time with my eldest. At that young of an age they need attention too from their mommy. With the first you could hold them all of the time and look at them well the slept but now you can't you have a second one too. My youngest got her attention when I breastfeed her or went out (she was in a carrier), otherwise I would try to either play with them both or give my eldest attention too to help her adjust. Our bedtime routine never changed either I would put the newborn to bed before my eldest or my husband would hold her while I put my eldest to bed. My problem was that I was the only one my eldest would let put her to bed. I still haven't changed that even now that my second is 16mths and I have a third due. Bedtime is time for me to bond with them. Enjoy this time and remember the hardest part of having two is finding time for each of them.

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C.S.

answers from Jacksonville on

I have newborn and a 18 mnth old also. Im not having sleep problems but there are jealousy issues. So maybe she wants to be held like the baby. Everything I do for the newborn my little girl wants to regress and me do the same for her. I did have to let her cry for a couple of days at first and show her that the baby had to go to bed also even if he didnt. That seemed to make her more relaxed. I wont let her cry for an hour or anything. If it got to that point I read a story sang hera song gave her a kiss and put her back down then she would not cry as long and fall asleep. Now she is sleeping great and for the first time ever she is sleeping through the night!

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K.L.

answers from Jacksonville on

Hi E.,

I would really reconsider giving a toddler chamomile tea... tiny bodies really react differently to herbal remedies. It's a matter of preference, totally, but I'm just not comfortable with it, because I guess I don't trust labels enough to be sure what all is in it.

Problem is, at this age... the child has to learn to soothe themselves (without aid, whether from herbal tea, you rocking her, pacifier, etc.)...

You may not want to hear this but crying it out at this age is not only appropriate if nothing else is wrong with your gal, but it works! And quickly! 3 hard evenings and you will have solved the problem. The first night is the worst... I cried for most of the 35 minutes she cried. The thing is... if you give in and go in (because most of us have to to be sure that nothing else is wrong with them) you start ALL OVER AGAIN from the beginning. So... I've been through this personally with my girl, who is now 27 months... first at 7 months, then at 15 months and even again just lately at 25 months. Honestly, I know it's hard, I KNOW IT, I've done it, but it works, it's the simplest quickest method there is and your child will NEVER remember this and probably thank you later for teaching them to be great sleepers! My girl has slept through the night since 10 weeks... and still sleeps an average of 11.5 hours a night (with a 90 minute nap) every day of the week at 27 months like clockwork, unless she is ill. So you be the judge.

One other piece of advice and please do not think that I have lost my mind... it is WAY easier to watch the lights on a monitor when they are all lit up like 4th of July, than it is to listen to your child scream. Turn it all the way down and just watch the lights.

Good luck! Write more if you'd like to!
K.

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M.C.

answers from Daytona Beach on

I agree that you are going to have to let her learn to self-soothe. She probably won't go to sleep without rocking because she is used to it and knows you will do it. My suggestion would be to let her cry for a couple of days. It will be hard but once those first few days are over, I'm sure she will go down fine.

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