Weaning After 1 Year

You do not need to wean at 1 year if things are going well and you are both enjoying it. You can get your body healthy and ready for baby #2 while breastfeeding. Natural weaning usually cuts out a feeding per day, one at a time. If you are feeding her other foods, and she sleeps through the night, you are probably menstruating & ovulating, so pregnancy will happen. Don't force the issue of weaning, you will regret it if you are already feeling sad to think about it.

Hi C.,

I thought that I would wean my daughter at about one year when I first started breastfeeding. Everyone that I knew seemed to think that there was no need to breastfeed past one year of age and many seemed to think that it was strange if you did breastfeed past one year. When one year came around, to me, it seemed strange to just suddenly stop breastfeeding because of some deadline that society set. It seemed strange to me to stop giving my baby the thing that nature made and was best for her just to give her milk from a completely different species (milk made to turn a calf into a cow). I knew that emotionally my daughter wasn't ready yet and neither was I. I decided to wait until I felt she was ready and hopefully I would be ready then too.
At 18-19 months she weaned very easily when I just slowly reduced the feedings and phased in more and more regular milk.
I know many mom's who have breastfeed through pregnancy.
If you decide that you need to stop breastfeeding now that is fine too. You and your daughter will adjust just fine. You can do it slowly if you need to. I just want to let you know that stopping at one year is not your only option.
all the best,
B.

C.,
You don't have to wean to get your body ready for baby #2. If you weren't having baby #2, would you wean so soon? If you are unable to get pregnant, would you regret weaning?

http://breastfeedingonline.com/newman.shtml

There are books out there on tandem nursing, and it is not impossible, nor is it unheard of.

I can't suggest anything for getting rid of the carrier; I'm all for it. She loves this being close to you, and it is comforting to her.

YOu'll figure out the sippy cup/bottle/straw issue - trial and error. You have to try what you're comfortable with (can you afford spilled milk?)

About cow's milk, after what I've read, I more than feel the same. But worse, we tried it and it doesn't agree with my son just yet. It took a week for him to smell right again (get it out of his system). It was awful too, and it didn't show up the first day either. Goat's milk has been better, but he doesn't like to drink it. So I froze it in cubes and add it to his food, which he likes just fine.

My son still nurses, and we'll go until he weans himself. He's started to sleep through the night again (it does happen!) and his supply is getting lower. I want him to nurse more, but he is going to determine this.

Water is just fine in a cup/sippy/bottle. It doesn't have to be milk. They just want the FAT in the milk because it is easy and most babies are attached to drinking from a bottle at 1 year. As long as you are supplementing the fat intake on other levels, you are fine. You have to support nerve and neuron development, and FAT is what does that - it is a 'coating' on the nerve.

Hope this helps,
Good luck,
M.

If neither of you are eager to wean, don't do it! The health (and emotional) benefits of nursing extend well beyond 12 months, and there's nothing wrong with nursing while pregnant, and there's nothing wrong with nursing two! Good luck!

I agree with Lisa - don't completely wean her now. Keep doing the feedings that are most important to both of you - such as morning and night. Try giving her whole milk in her sippy cup at meals after one years old. I had to water down the milk to make it thinner for my daughter at first. It was my goal to nurse her until one year old, but like you, when her first birthday approached I felt it was too soon to completely wean her. I kept nursing her 2-3 times a day until about 16 months when it became only the morning feeding. Around 18 months I realized that she didn't need it as desperately as I thought (because some mornings she could go without it) and it had become almost annoying for me because morning nursing would take so long because I probably had very little milk. I started giving her a sippy cup of milk in the morning instead of nursing her - by then she loved her milk. This way weaning was easy, natural, with no regrets because we were both completely ready.

You truly don't sound ready to wean, so why do it? Why do that to the baby who obviously isn't ready to wean? You don't have to stop nursing to get ready for baby #2, so why do it?

I don't know what to tell you about dirty cows milk - it's not, if it was, you wouldn't drink it!! Talk to your pediatrician about your concerns, see what they have to say.

Best wishes on baby #2! ****baby dust to you!***

J.

Don't wean her! Sorry for the strong reaction, but you sound like you're definitely not ready. Also, as others have said, you don't need to wean in order to prepare for pregnancy or to get pregnant. I got pregnant when my son was 20 months old, and he continued to nurse until just after his first birthday, which was a few weeks ago. I think he only stopped because my supply dropped off so much. Your body is amazing and can do wonderful things. You can nurse one child and create another one, without detriment to either one of them. Make sure you get good nutrition, because you're the one who will suffer if you don't. Good luck, and have fun. Nursing past age one is great--they start to get very interactive, playing games with you while nursing, holding your hand, high-fiving, etc. If you need extra support or still have questions, check out the La Leche League website for more info.

Hi C.,

I also cried when nursing came to an end...but it was my 18 month old son who initiated it! *smile* I thought he must not need me any more (silly, I know), and I was absolutely mourning the loss of that very intimate time we had together. You don't sound like you actually WANT to give it up yet...do you? My advice is to nurse until either you or your daughter has had enough and don't enjoy it anymore. You will never have this particular bonding experience with her again; hold onto it for as long as you can/want to.

Several other moms have already mentioned that getting pregnant while nursing is certainly possible. I would think that it is even more so at this stage, when she is only supplementing with your milk, not living off of it exclusively. Also, would it be bad if you didn't get pregnant for another year instead of in another 6 months?

If you are not truly ready to give up nursing, and your daughter has shown no interest in weaning either, I think it will be very hard and emotionally painful for both of you. Please spare yourself...they grow up so quickly! Give both of you some more time.

Whatever you do, good luck! And know that the tears are perfectly normal; it's all part of the long journey we're on as mothers. It didn't hit me until my son was born, but we spend 9 months working hard to keep those babies safe inside...and the rest of their lives separating ourselves a little at a time so that they can go out into the world as their own independent people. It's a really hard job! *smile*

T.

C.,

I hate to tell you this but she is not going to be weaned in 2 weeks if you want to do it gently for both of you. You need to begin replacing the feedings that way your body has a chance to respond and she doesn't feel like her comfort system is being yanked away from her all at once time. Does she not take bottles or cups now at any of her naps? I hate to tell you but my 17 month old has been VERY difficult to wean. I've managed to stop the afternoon feeding and that's it. My oldest I had drinking an occasional bottle once a day so he was weaned by 13 1/2 months old. I just think you need to be prepared that she is mostly likely not going to be weaned by a year. Would you be willing to put off getting pregnant by a few months so you can wean her more gradually?

Weaning does not mean your child becomes an adult.
Cows milk is not dirty. Adults and children have been
drinking it, um, for many years. You need to start
changing her bedtime routine this way the changes
occur slowly. If you tried to wean her and change her
sleep routine you would throw her into a tizzy for sure.
If you are relaxed about the whole thing, it will be OK.
Many of the concerns are really about you.

Hi C., Yes you have packed a lot of questions but I will try to asnwer them. First I have been there years ago. The longest I nursed was 9 mos. and that son is 27 today! The sadness you feel is because nursing is so natural, beautiful and relaxing and not a control thing. Weaning is done gradually. I do not remember too much of a hormone thing but I did become pregnant almost immediately. My first 2 are very close. Yes I will pray for your second. I come from the old school so my children went right to milk at 3-4 months old. My oldest is 42. I have seen that some of todays moms feel as you do and use soy milk or no cows milk and baby gets the calcium from yogurt. As far as the night feeding routine you can keep that until the last and try her one night without and see how it goes. Try to have as little trauma for both of you. I'm sure you will get some good advice from moms who have done this recently. You should also remember that your precise plan may not happen because God is in control. Just go with it and love your baby and continue to be the best mom you can be. Many blessings, Grandma Mary

C.,
I can relate to what you're feeling- not wanting to wean, but excited about having another baby. I gradually reduced nursing to once or twice a day, always before bed. I never got my period, but got pregnant. When I was several months pregnant my daughter began to wean herself (at about 17 months) It was sad, but I felt better that it was her choice. I wish you and your family the best!

Hi C.- I am a mother of 3 children and I nursed all three until they were at least a year old. I think I finally weaned my youngest when he was 15 months. I would not recommend waiting so long because the older they get the more stubborn they are. I would start immediately cutting out the nursing between meals. It's easier to distract them with other things to do. Give her a sippy
cup with either cows milk or soy milk. You can get one of those cups that has more of a nipple looking spout. I think Avent makes one. My daughter was excited to use a cup. She actually went from nursing to a cup with a straw during the day and a cup with more of a nipple during the night (I guess it was more comforting than the straw cup) The night time nursing is more difficult as I think it gives them more comfort. Don't go cold turkey all at once. Start with the day nursing and work toward the night nursing. Also remember that if you are wanting to get pregnant again I don't think your OBGYN would want you nursing too. I had to wean my second child because I was pregnant with my third. My kids always liked to take their naps in a regular bed and went to bed at night in their cribs. Good luck. Stay firm and consistant in order to start good eating and sleeping habits. You definately want her to have good habits if you are preparing for a second child.

I didnt breast feed but when I weaned my son off formula I would do his bottles with 2 oz cow milk for 2 days along with the formula and 4 oz the following 2 days and so on. It worked well. He likes it enough. He is now 13 mos. Every new thing breaks your heart that they grow up. Wait til the first haircut when they don't look like babies nay more but little people! Not sure if I am much help.

the great thing about this request is there is no right answer...go with what you feel, YOU'RE mom! If you want to cut out all nursing except the nightime, go ahead...if you want to cut it all out..that's okay too! You're not going to love her any less with each milestone she reaches...you'll be surprized by how independant she'll become(almost overnight) once you stop nursing...I've nursed 5 babies and for all different lengths of time...my first 2 kids for about 8 months because as they started on solids I became pregnant and chose to stop, my third son I only nursed for 3 months because his older brother was 1 and 1/2 and into everything...everytime I sat down to nurse I had to pull #2 off of the kitchen counter...my 4th son for 13 months and my last for 16months(because he had pnuemonia...it became his comfort and I had an emotionally hard time weaning him)...I don't love any of my kids more or less based on when they weaned...each child I had planned to nurse for a year, plans change and I had to adapt...take the sugestions you get and mold them to fit your style...we're all different and what works for one won't always work for another...in my expirence cutting out one feeding everyother day worked best for my first 4, I had to just cut off the 5th because nursing was his security blanket after being sick so we had 3 days of tears about one tough week and then he was done...goodluck!

I started giving my daughter organic whole milk or vanilla soy milk when she turned one (now at 21 months, we just use organic). I offered it to her in a sippy cup at meals and then at snacks and throughout the day and before bed, I continued to nurse her several times a day but no more middle of the night feedings. She was interested in nursing less an less as she started to learn how to walk and of course she was getting plenty of fluids from the sippy. It was a little sad, but nursing just seemed to fade away at 15 months when she truly began to walk. Every couple of days she would come over to me and pull on my shirt but I just distracted her and she never looked back.
I also nursed her to sleep, so at 12 months I started changing that habit at naptime first, then worked it's way to bedtime. For her 10:00 nap I would give her a snack and sippy before and same thing with her 2:00 nap. By 14 months she was taking one nap at 12:30, so she had lunch and sippy before hand. I would try making a fresh start with the napping in the crib, read books and play music or whatever you do at night time, minus the nursing when your ready:-)
I didn't stop nusing because of this, but I also wanted to get my body in good, healthy shape for baby number two(due June 14th 2009) and I think I was on a better track when still nursing, it is easier to take care of yourself when someone you love is depending on it, so all that to say, don't let that be the reason you stop nursing now. Good luck with everything!

Hi C.

I'm just at the end of weaning my two year old. I, like you enjoyed the special time nursing gave us and was reluctant to give it up. My son is developmental delayed so I wanted to do it with as little stress to him as possible. Here's what I did, some suggestions might work for you.

Skip the bottle. If she likes cups use them. There’s no reason to get her comfortable with a bottle only to have to take it away in a few months.

Remove one feeding at a time until the only ones left are the ones before nap and bed time.

Stop wearing a nursing bra and try outfits like jumpers, the less you smell of milk and are dressed to allow your daughter to get into your shirt the easier it will be to skip that feeding. Expect her to fuss, but give her a snack and try to distract with another fun activity like going outside at those times.

If possible, have someone else get her when she cries at night so she will have practice being soothed without nursing.

Put nursing at the beginning of bed time prep so there are activities such as reading that immediately proceed going into her crib.

Once you are only nursing at bed and naps try reducing the amount of time you let her nurse. My son usually nursed 15 minutes so I started breaking his latch at 15 always. Once this didn't elicit crying I reduced it to 14 minutes. I was able to drop about a minute a week.

Find another physically close thing you can to right after nursing so she is still getting a lot of physical contact such as putting your check on her check when she drinks her milk, or gently squeezing her between a small pillow and your body. (I know that sounds weird, but my son's occupation therapist suggested it and my son loves it, your daughter may as well.)

If possible go out one night a week over bed time so your daughter will get practice going to sleep without nursing without the frustration of having Mommy right there and refusing to nurse.

Last thing on weaning, goat milk is easier for babies to digest that cow. Also organic milk may help relieve some of your anxiety about what she is drinking. Having special milk just for the baby makes it psychologically easier than giving her the same thing you pour on your cereal.

On sleeping, my son had a very hard time with sleeping in his crib. I eventually had to lean over the crib so I could have my chest on his and my arms around him to get him to fall asleep out of my arms. I slowly moved myself farther and farther away over a few weeks till he could fall asleep without me.

Best of luck