Transitioning an Attachment-parenting Baby to Nanny Care or Daycare?

I had to start daycare right around that age. The most iportant thing is to find a GOOD daycare setting. If you can afford a nanny, that's the way to go. Find someone who knows about attachment parenting and is willing to follow your guidelines. Have the nanny come in while you're around in the beginning, just for a few hours so she becomes a familiar face.
For us hiring a nanny was financially out of the question. It took me months to find a quality childacre center, after searching the web and calling places I eventually found the NAYEC website and called the centers that were NAYEC certified until I found one that I liked - and fortunately it had an open infant space. I came with her for about 1-2 hours every morning for a week, so she could get used to the new surroundings. Then I stayed with her for 1 hour every morning before leaving her for another few weeks.
Make sure there is a low ratio and the teachers know about infant care and ECE. Our teachers were fabulous and were constantly holding the babies, singing and talking to them. They were only in their crib for naptime. She is still in the same center, in the toddler room and loves going there.

Good luck!

I haven't had that experience (still a SAHM) but have read that around 10 or 11 months they become more open to other adults besides their primary caretaker, so your timing is pretty good. My hunch is that transitioning is the right word: introduce gradually and have the separation distance increase over time. Good luck.

My little guy started in a wonderful home daycare at 4 months... we started with 2 days a week, and about 4-6 hours a day at the beginning. It worked great for us.

Several things that were important to us in our search for a daycare provider: finding someone who was referred by friends, finding someone who would "wear" our baby, and finding someone who would feed stored breast milk, and then organic food once he was older... our provider met all of those needs, and we're still very happy with her now that our little boy is nearly 2 years old.

It was a tough transition at first, especially for me! But I think it's been good for our little boy get a lot of socialization at his daycare (if he hadn't done daycare, he would hardly have seen other kids, given the fact that we live way out of town.) It's also nice that he's still the baby of the bunch.

Best of luck!

I know of a family who has an au pair. She would go to work with the mom and the baby and eventually she could stay at home with the baby while mom went to work.
Au pairs can be a great childcare solution for many families. Please, feel free to send me a message if you want more info.
L., local childcare coordinator

We had two daycare situations: a nanny-type and preschool-type. The were both fantastic for different reasons. We did the nanny-type until 3.5, then overlapped with preschool... and she still sees our son one afternoon a week, because she's amazing and we love her influence.

The two biggest pieces of advice I can give regarding leaving are patterned goodbyes and nonchalance... they tie together because the single best thing you can do, is with every ounce of your being, be happy/normal/relaxed/at ease.

The reason?

It's usually a lot harder for the parents to transition than the children.

Babies and children take their cues from us. They watch us (or if we're holding them feel us)... if we're nervous, upset, sad, etc... they see a bad situation coming on & react badly to it. After all, if Mum! The guardian of all that is right in the world, is upset there must be something REALLY scary about to happen.

If you've ever had the misfortune of having a miserable day, being stressed out of your mind... with the baby crying... and then not five minutes after someone else takes them (dad, nana, friend, etc.) the baby is not only quiet but asleep and you're torn between relief and mortal jealousy... you know exactly what I mean. Cycles of negative emotion feed back and forth inciting stronger and strong reactions. Nothing mystical about it, just a natural behavior response.

This hold true for years and years. If you're anxious and upset, your little one will be, too. So if you're dropping off... and nervous... fake it. I can't count the number of times I've seen crying parents and crying kids... and then the parents saying that their child HATES "x". Sigh. USUALLY, as soon as the distraught parent has been gone for a few minutes the child takes the happy cues from the other people around them and has a blast. Distraught parent picks up, and the child breaks down right with them.

Poor things, all around. Such a vicious cycle. So when you find a person or place that you TRUST after vetting... go with your gut and TRUST them.

Patterned goodbyes are easy... you already do them every time you lay down for a nap, or bedtime. I don't know about you, but I had to have someone else point out that it makes strong attachments sooooo much easier in regards to going to and fro. Mummy does her "thing", she goes, she comes back. Imprinted and driven home into a faith through repetition. Mummy always comes back.

I learned patterned goodbyes from my mum and early daycare (having a ritual; ours was hugs, kisses, and waving with HUGE smiles all the way to the car, with his little arm being waved until I was out of sight). Routines for leaving (like bedtimes, and other transitions) make those transitions easier.

Good Luck