School Issues

You don't and you can't. It is harder for some kids then others. My daughter was the ONLY one crying yesterday morning in the 1st grade. It rememinded me of Kindergarten. The best thing I can do is try and get her to talk about her fears. So far these are her fears: the long day (she was a 1/2 day Kinder), lunch - thought the teacher was going to make her eat her entire lunch that I packed and she can't see over the lunch cart so is afraid of getting lunch from school. She is also afraid of not understanding the teacher's directions and asking for help. She DOESN'T want to get into trouble.

I tried to bring out all the positives of school - recess, playing with her friends and learning new things - and made examples of what she learned last year and how much fun it is to now read and write notes, etc.

I let her sneak a few small friends into her backpack that stay in her backpack and are NOT allowed out. I took her school before it started and showed her the room and we met her teacher in the hall. I would have showed her, her desk and all but the room was locked. I give her little sayings that come on Dove Chocolates - which she loves. Right now she keeps saying the one "Smile when you want to, cry when you have to and laugh you can" - something like that.

Most importantly - you can't fake them out. They are scared little beings. My husband still remembers hating his first day. I don't. Each child will take different memories from their first day and apply them to their own life.

Just be there for your son, comfort him, tell him you'll be on time to pick him up and help him to talk.

Positively,
M.

Did you mean how do you make your six year old sonw ant to TALK ABOUT his 1st day of school? :)

If so - you can't really make your child talk about anything, but what I've found helpful is to find out the daily schedule at school, then ask very specific questions:

1. what did you do at circle time?
2. what book did they read in the library? did you like it?
3. did you play ball at P.E.
4. what intrument did you play at music?
5. Who is the best reader in your classroom?
6. Who do you sit with at your table group?
7. Who is nice to you?
8. Who is mean to you?
9. Can you show me a math problem you did, and I'll try to figure out the answer?
10. Who did you play with at recess?

I hope that helps!
:) S.

Actually, it's impossible to "make" anybody want anything. And coaxing can easily be interpreted by an anxious child as manipulative, or even bullying, no matter how gentle you think you are being.

But there are ways to be empathetic and enthusiastic that a child can recognize as supportive, and not manipulative.

I don't know from your brief request what your son's reluctance is about, so it will be really hard for us moms to give any specific suggestions.

Can you add to your request and tell us more? Does he show lots of "attitude?" Does he seem anxious, or angry? Does he make negative comments about school? Have friends or older siblings given him impressions that affect his expectations?

At this late date, and without more details about your son's problem, I can only suggest that you take him to the school before his first day, show him around, talk about what he might expect, and if his teacher is available (they're usually there getting organized in the week or two before school), introduce the two of them. If your son is anxious about the unknown, a little familiarity might help relieve his fears.

You could keep him home another year or two -- or longer. Homeschooling until the child is 8 years old is simple in Washington State -- simply don't send him to school and continue to educate him as you have been doing his whole life! :) After age 8, you only need to file an Intent to Homeschool with Superintendent of your district. This is just a form that says you are homeschooling your child. Washington Homeschool Organization is a wealth of information. http://www.washhomeschool.org/

I encourage you to check into this. Some kids are simply not ready for school when society says they should be. Please feel free to conatct me if you have any questions.

Have your brang your son to his new school, showed him around and let him see how exciting the new adventure will be?
We went to open house this evening, and my son was soooo excited he wanted to start school tomorrow. It just took seeing everyting..and all the kids etc!

I would let him know that there are going to be alot of other kids there and that he will be able to play with the other kids and he gets to play outside. Is he going into K or 1st grade? You can always stay there for a couple of hour too Teachers don't normaly have a problem with this.

Hope this helps
Kim