Potty Training and Holding It for Hours

Updated on December 22, 2010
S.V. asks from Anaheim, CA
6 answers

Hello mamas!

I started potty training my 3.5 year old son on Monday-5 accidents 1st day, 2 accidents yesterday and so far none today. I am doing the method of waiting till he has an accident and rushing him to finish on the toilet. I have charts with stickers, gummys and using TV as a reward. No diapers at night either-we threw them all away (At least he thinks so-we are passing them along).

My question is when any of you trained how long did it take for them to pee, especially the first one of the day?? Yesterday he didnt pee for the first time till 2pm! Today we changed his sheets at 12:30 this morning and it took him until 11am to pee after dancing around and him going to the toilet about 5 times on his own to not go at all. We played in the water for a while several times hoping it would help release it, then finially I turned the bathtub on and he went after holding it amost 12 hours! And he has only pooped 2 "nuggets" in 2 days. Anyone have similar experiences please let me know what you did to help "let it flow" and how to help out the poop, what high fiber foods are best? Thanks!

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So What Happened?

I've been giving him TONS of juice, water, milk, popcicles and trying to get him to the toilet before he goes, but when he looks like he is doing the pee pee dance, I rush him and he holds it. Just a litle while ago he had 3 accidents, all about 5 minutes apart, then finially I cought the last one before he went-he cried saying he wanted his diaper and he went. So he got his gummy and a popcicle-and gets to watch TV- 1 show. He doesnt like it when I make a big deal about it-doesnt even want me to look in the toilet!!! When he calms down I tell him how proud of him I am and we put the sticker on his chart. I do tell him stories and try to get him to not be afraid changing the subject when he cries, letting him know it will be ok and attempting to help him not to be afraid.

More Answers

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M.S.

answers from Los Angeles on

I feel like he is being set up to fail by waiting till he started to go. Especially if he has to go bad, good chance it will all come out before he makes the toilet, not to mention - you have to be right by his side to catch the first sign that he is about to go. Why not just set up a bathroom routine. Don't ASK if he needs to go, give him two choices... "Do you want to go potty in your bathroom or my bathroom?" or "Do you want me to read you this book or that book while you go potty?" And offer this up every hour or so - depends on how often he needs to go but no more than two hours. If he is ready - this will happen quickly - if not then it could be months of work. My son was 3 and my daughter was almost 4 but since they were ready, we only had a couple of accidents. And of course, be patient and keep it low stress (sounds like you are doing a good job of this already).

You don't want him holding his poop - that could lead to something bigger (major constipation - stretched colon - encopresis - years and years of getting things back on track) - NOT FUN!

Hope that helps!

2 moms found this helpful

N.B.

answers from Minneapolis on

I would try to catch him before he has an accident. He needs to feel more success. I have successfully helped train several children with their parents (I do daycare) with the ideals of a 3 day method...and we never make them sit at timed intervals. But we remind them all day long..CONSTANTLY...to "let me know when you need to go".."remember I can help you when you need to go"...etc. And had them in just undies and a tshirt....and an overly watchful eye for whatever became their signals before it became verbal with the "I need to go potty". For many it was a little wiggle and dance...some it was a whine and a cry..or a scoot and repositioning..or just coming to stand right at my feet and staring at me. They all did something!

Mine all got one single M&M if they produced something successfully in the toilet...2 if it was poo. Eventually we just "run out" or forget to buy more, etc.....

All my kids (5 in the last 15 mos..ages 22 mos-28 mos)..were successfully trained for all day in the 3-5 days initially. Some did night training quick as well..others took longer (I am not certain as I only have them in the day)...but I never ever once put a pull up or diaper on any of them once they started the "potty boot camp" method. It works and they can do it successfully!

Good luck!

1 mom found this helpful
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A.H.

answers from Jacksonville on

During the day, give him more liquids than you usually do. Encourage him to drink more than usual; that will make him go pee more often! And of course, reward him for going in the potty ONLY (otherwise he will think that every time he goes to the potty, whether he goes or not, qualifies as a reward).

Apple juices, etc. will make him poop.

Good luck!

L.T.

answers from New York on

I have no personal experience with this, but just saw a Supernanny episode with a 3yo who was afraid of the toilet. He obviously had to go, but would scream for a diaper rather than use the toilet or his little potty. What eventually worked, and seemed to work well (of course this was a tv show edited for drama so who knows), was having him sit on the toilet when he had to go, and putting no pressure on him whatsoever. Just sitting there like it was a chair. His dad told him a fun story, and the kid got relaxed and distracted and suddenly started peeing! Then it was lots of praise. Next time there was less of a big story and more of just "relax, you did this before, it's no big deal".

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S.S.

answers from Goldsboro on

I am training my son who is 22 months. I started 3 days ago with him wearing no pants or diaper. I set my kitchen timer for 20 minutes. When it went off, we went to the bathroom. If he went, he went and got a M&M for peeing, 2 for pooping.
By the end of the day, when the timer went off, he'd yell "potty" and run to the bathroom.
Yesterday, I put him in cloth trainers. He's still in a diaper at night and will probably will be for a while.
I think some of these previous posters are right. I think when you're waiting to take him once he starts is too late.

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S.H.

answers from Honolulu on

Night time & nap time dryness... is something that is BIOLOGICALLY, not attained, until even 7 years old. NOT at this age.

Kids, even if potty trained, WILL have accidents. It is childhood.
Just use a waterproof bed pad. Amazon has lots.

Holding pee or poop... is NOT good, internally. They can get a host of physical medical based problems that way.

The 'impulse control' for pottying... is not age related... it is physiological based and per the development of their organs and brain connections.

When kids start to 'withhold' their poop... this is not good. The stool gets hardened, it causes pain, they get constipated and their stool can get backed up internally, and some develop Encopresis... and bulging bowels or the bowels internally gets stretched out. My Daughter, at that age, had to see a Pediatric Gastroenterologist... due to Constipation. HE said, do not force it... a child will potty when ready. Everyday, he sees toddlers like this... and it is not good for their body, medically. It took my Daughter, THREE months, to get her constipation... normalized. For example. Even if we did not force her pottying. It was just, for her, 'stress' and anxiety....

Once constipated... it causes the child to withhold their poop more, that then causes pain upon exiting, and internally the stool gets hardened too.

Again, day time and night-time/nap time pottying are two SEPARATE time-lines and different things all together.

all the best,
Susan

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