Pacifier Weaning: Cold Turkey?

Updated on March 10, 2011
K.S. asks from New York, NY
12 answers

my 21 month old baby girl always used the paci to fall asleep for naps, bedtime and from time to time when she was real upset and only wanted to cuddle. i VERY rarely allowed her to have it in public and never let her walk around all day with it and she never really wanted to either. For some reason lately she has regressed and wants if more frequently during the day and started calling it "Passs" and asking for it. I am 26 weeks pregnant...don't know if she's regressed because she senses baby # 2 coming. She also just got over a back to back Right ear infection but her last day of antibioitcs just finished and she doens't seen to be acting sick at all.
So i decided to wean her. We made it the entire day today without it. She didn't take a nap so that made it easy. She went to bed without it being she was so exhausted from no nap. everytime she would pull me to the drawer in kitchen where we keep them, i just said"all gone" and she said "all gone!" also!

i was just wondering if i let her have it just for sleep and not during the day is that a BAD idea??? Or should completely go cold turkey and take it away?! Also , say the weaning is a success?? When baby # 2 comes in June and that baby has a pacifier, is my little girl going to want it again being that she will
SEE it?

My decision to wean her is based on the fact that I read studies have shown a link to ear infections and paci use AND for dental reasons. I had my bottle myself very late and my teeth were a mess because of it. some of my veteran mom friends said they waited til AFTER age 2 to wean their kids from paci bacause you can reason with them easier at that age. any thoughts? thank u!!

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C.C.

answers from Sacramento on

Just cut the tip off, and give it to her whenever she asks for it. Within a day or two the "broken" binky will be forgotten. I know, sounds easy. But it works!

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M.S.

answers from San Francisco on

Don't give it back to her~ Your doing great! Cut the paci tip if you want to and if she gets really frantic for her, give it to her-she will see its different and give it up. GL

M

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K.M.

answers from New York on

I say cold turkey is best. Good luck!

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

Cold turkey has my vote, but I wouldn't cut the tips off so she sees them broken, my daughter looked SO sad when she saw her binkies with the tips cut off. I think it is better to get rid of them altoghter. Have the "binky fairy" come and to collect her binkies and leave a small "big girl" gift.

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M.H.

answers from Dallas on

Hi, I get the Baby 411 newsletter and here is a recent article in it about this subject:

Binkygate: When are you too old to have a pacifier?
>
> Newborns have very few skills to soothe themselves-sucking being one of them. So, it's commonplace to find an infant using a pacifier or sucking his thumb or fingers. But by 4-6 months of age, babies have other strategies to calm themselves down. And by the time babies reach their first birthdays, they are definitely ready to lose the binky and move on.
>
> But, we've all seen kids who are much older than that clinging to their beloved binky. Case in point: Suri Cruise, who turns 5 in April. Other than this accessory clashing with her Dolce&Gabbana handbag, is there any harm in continuing to use the binky?
>
> Yes. We don't really care what celebrity families do, but MANY other parents continue to give their kids a pacifier long after they really need it and it can have some adverse health effects. Here are a few:
>
> . Pacifier use is a known risk factor for ear infections.
>
> . Prolonged pacifier use in preschool years and once the permanent teeth come in (around age 5) can lead to an altered bite position of the teeth or a cross bite.
>
> . Older kids who use pacifiers also put other things in their mouths to explore them, instead of using their hands. That means more risk of germs entering the mouth and leading to infections.
>
> . Pacifier use at bedtime is a sleep crutch. Kids think they need to be sucking to fall asleep, thus they need to suck when they awaken at the end of every sleep cycle (about every 90 minutes). If the pacifier falls out, they wake up and start looking for it (or scream for a parent to come put it back in). There is a real health value in a good uninterrupted night's sleep for both child and parents. Most parents are too exhausted to get out of this vicious cycle to realize that!
>
> Parents allow the binky to remain in their child's life long after infancy because life just seems easier with it around. It calms and quiets the child, or it helps the child fall asleep. But the truth is, kids are much more resilient than parents give them credit for. Out of sight is out of mind. If the binky disappears, the child quickly moves on and adapts. Really! And, it only gets harder to take away as the child gets older.
>
> Sometimes Mom and Dads need to grow up with their child!
>

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K.R.

answers from Spokane on

I tried only giving it during sleep time, and my son went bezerk, and wanted it even MORE during the day... SO, we went cold turkey at 22 months. it was three nights of a few minutes of crying, then he was over it. My daughter came along, and she WOULDN'T take a paci, so you may not even encounter the problem of paci jealousy! :) I had a neighbor though, whose middle child would steal all the baby's paci's and hide them! They just kept buying more, and when they moved, they found like 20 pacifiers stuffed in various pieces of furniture! HAHA I guess my best advice there is not to worry about it, and cross that bridge when you get to it.

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M.L.

answers from Houston on

Yes..cold turkey. My son was 3 and HE LOVED HIS BINKY....had it all the time. Doc said cold turkey was best. 3 nights of hell and it will all be over :)

G.T.

answers from Modesto on

She's at a good age to get rid of it, and it seems she did well tonight, right? I'd keep it gone and the habit should be broken well enough where she wont need it even after the baby comes. She might fiddle with the baby's and try to steal it from time to time, but I doubt she'll be hooked on it, she'll only want it for attention. Teaching her to be the "big sister" begins now, by losing the paci and if you can get her out of diapers if she's still in them, you will make your life a lot easier when baby comes.
Good luck :)

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J.G.

answers from Minneapolis on

We are weaning my son too because I am so tired of always having to have one on hand! He had his in his mouth all day long until last week, then we went down to just nap and bedtime. My SIL weaned my niece cold turkey. She said my niece woke up at night and cried for it for a few nights, and now doesn't even talk about it. I don't think your daughter will even remember having one when the new baby comes. Good luck!

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K.M.

answers from Kansas City on

We also did cold turkey with our two oldest. They only had them at night and the first few nights were ROUGH, but we stayed strong and by night #3 they stopped asking. When the next baby came along I purposely bought completely different pacifiers. Both of my older sons were very picky about their pacifiers, so when they would see a different one, they weren't interested.

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D.J.

answers from Atlanta on

Yes go cold turkey! I took my daughter off the bottle and pacifier at 12 months old because I feel like if you are old enough to ask for it, then you are too old to have it. The way I did it was...I just threw them all away. Sure she wanted them, but I didnt have any to give her. You are telling her "all gone" but really they are not. And then you give it to her. But if you throw them all away, they really will be gone, and you wont have any to give her. After you have your baby, please dont give in and start back giving her a pacifier again. she is entirely to old for it. Be strong. Good luck.

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K.U.

answers from Detroit on

Your teeth could have been more messed up from the bottle if there was milk or juice or other sugary liquid in it and you were sucking from it all day and all night - that will cause dental problems way more than a pacifier.

Around 12 months was when we decided to limit pacifier use to sleep time only (or REALLY long car trips!) and DD did fine with that. Problem was, there was only 1 pacifier that she would use and she would not touch any others. It started getting really grubby and nasty, even with repeated washing. And she suddenly started wanting it all the time - in the car, watching TV on the couch, if she hurt herself, etc. So finally we started telling her about the Binky Fairy. The Binky Fairy would take her binky away if she left it on the windowsill and leave a big girl present in its place, because big girls don't need binkies, they are for babies. Then just after she turned 2.5, I just suggested one night we leave the binky for the Binky Fairy and see what would happen. DD went along with it and did fine that night. It was the next night that she had a rougher time of it and wanted the Binky Fairy to bring it back. But we held firm, said nope, sorry, doesn't work that way. She fussed for about a week straight at bed time but each night it got a little better until after a week she stopped talking and asking about it. Letting her have the pacifier up to that age did not cause any health issues - her teeth are fine and she's had 1 ear infection her whole life (I, on the other hand, sucked my thumb when I was little and that is way worse for your teeth and creating orthodontic issues!).

Since she sounds like she is okay with it being "all gone", I would just not bring it out any more and see how she does. By the time baby #2 comes, she will probably be well past needing it, though regression can happen sometimes if she senses that being a baby gets you lots of attention. My DD sees babies with pacifiers now and will notice them, but not ask for hers back or talk about missing it herself.

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