My 8 1/2 Month Old Is Waking as Often as a Newborn!

Updated on November 18, 2015
L.W. asks from Portsmouth, VA
11 answers

Hi, I am a second time mommy to Noah who is 8 1/2 months old. We've had month of sleeping through the night and recently, he's starting getting up 2 or 3 times per night. He cries and cries until I feed him or put him to bed over and over again. He'll fall asleep in my arms and then as soon as he hits the crib he's screaming again. At this age, he should be sleeping through the night without needing a bottle. He eats plenty during the day. I suspected teeth but when I have given him Tylenol or Motrin at bedtime he is still waking through the night just the same. I don't think it's his ears because there has been no fever and he seems fine during the day. Does anyone have any suggestions or ideas to what this may be?? Separation anxiety? I just don't know and I'm getting exhausted and frustrated with him! Help!

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J.D.

answers from Charlotte on

the same thing was happening to us! I have an 8 month old. I think it is teething, he did this with the last set. But I think separation anxiety is part of it too, he wakes up in pain and we're not there. Three nights ago I started leaving a tank top of mine in his crib and it seems to be working. It really seems to comfort him. When I go to get him in the morning its shoved under his belly. So cute!

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K.L.

answers from Jacksonville on

Im sorry to say this, but I disagree with a lot of this advice. Crying it out, in my opinion, is one of the worst things you can do to a child. There have been so many studies showing the effect of crying it out and the babies brain. You don't need to stop comforting him or reteaching him to sleep. Hes a baby for crying out loud. At this age, they are not yet old enough to know how to manipulate you. They know that they need or want something and crying is their only means of communication. Ds is also 8 1/2 months, and he usually sleeps through the night. he is cutting a tooth, so the past few nights he is waking. I cuddle with him in the bed and breastfeed him. then if i try to put him back down in the crib and he cries i pick him up again and take him downstairs and let him play. after a while he gets worn out, i put him in the crib and he is knocked out. Im sorry, but i just dont get how people can willingly let their kids cry, when all they want are their mommies. To me, in my opinion it just seems cruel. I dont and have never let ds cry it out for any reason. I try to be as responsive to him as i can so that he can for a secure attachment to me.

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E.A.

answers from Raleigh on

You need to reteach him how to sleep through the night. Either don't go in and check on him, or check on him without picking him up/consoling him. He may cry for as long as a couple of hours, but he needs to learn. Sometimes they just have sleep disturbances, just like us, but are unable to put themselves back to sleep. They have to learn this. You can try doing nothing at all and seeing how long it takes him to fall asleep. Or you can go check on, then check on him again in 5 min, 15 min, 30, and 45. Each time waiting a little bit longer and never getting him out of his crib. "Shhhh" to him, pat him on the back, whisper/sing to him, but allow him to put himself back to sleep without any props or assistance from you. Rocking him back or holding him until he falls asleep again will only teach him how to fall back in that situation. You may want to consider reading the Baby Whisperer. It was a very helpful book when dealing with issues just like this. I would recommend starting any method on a Thursday, so that Friday even/sat. you can have some assistance because you will be exhausted. It only takes a couple of nights, but they figure it out. Just be consistant.

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K.D.

answers from Greensboro on

The exact same thing happened to me when my son was almost 9 months old. My pediatrician says it is just a case of him knowing what he wants and how to get it. These were my pediatrician's suggests and they worked great for me. My pediatrician said to quit going in his room and he will quit crying out at night thinking its time to eat or be held just because he happened to wake up. Going in the room shows him that is fine to cry at night and you will come to soothe him or feed him. Babies at this age do not NEED to eat during the night, it is strictly a want or a routine for them to eat when they wake up. He very well may be teething, but that does not mean that he needs to get up during the night. If he cries for 30 minutes or more, he said to go in there and talk to him to reassure him and give him some medicine if need be, but not to pick him up and let him nurse. It was SO HARD to do that! I only had to do that a few times, before he started sleeping better. When I suspected a he was teething from this point on, I gave him some tyelenol before bed and rubbed some medicine on his gums and usually didn't have to give him any more meds during the night. My pediatrician said that I was making things worse by going in there to hold or nurse him a little to soothe him back to sleep. He said to go five nights in a row with letting him self soothe when he wakes up during the night. It didn't even take 5 nights for him to stop crying out for me and sleep through the night. In fact, he has slept through the night from 8pm-8am everynight since he was 9 months old and he is 13 months now. Its hard to hear him cry, I know, trust me, but it is for the best in the long run to have a baby with healthy sleep habits. Yours is probably going to be a strong willed baby like mine! I am constantly having to tell myself that I am the parent and I know what's best, despite what he thinks.

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K.C.

answers from Roanoke on

We went through that with Olivia at that age, too. We finally just let her cry a couple times and she puts herself back to sleep easily now. I know it's hard to hear them cry. We would get up with her a few times and rock her back to sleep, but then we'd lose too much sleep. Have you bought a crib toy that hooks on and plays music or has a light he can look at? That may help. I would stop feeding him a bottle during the night. Olivia has a pacifier that she loves at night. If you want to rule out ear infection, I'd take him to the pediatrician, just to be sure it's nothing physically hurting him. Good luck!

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B.H.

answers from Norfolk on

Hi!
My 10 month old goes through this a lot with his teeth. They are the slowest teeth I've ever seen, it is miserable, and the hardest part about it is that you can't see or feel them until the pain is over, so you're never sure!
Check your dosage on the motrin. Make sure you're giving him the right amount for his weight.

Is anything else different? Any daytime behavioral changes or changes in routine? Anything he does a lot more than usual?

If it continues, I'd take him to the ped. just to be sure.

Good luck!!

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P.B.

answers from Raleigh on

L.,

It still could be ears.....laying down can increase the pain at night.

I just wrote a response to another mom about the same issue. I told her to document her son's daily routine....waking, eating, nap time, eating, playing...etc. You may begin to see a pattern and notice that something he only eats at night causes a tummy ache, or he is overstimulated after bathtime, or his pj's have an itchy tag....etc.

I was crazy for a few years w/o good sleep.....when things were really bad, I just slept in the oversized recliner with my son in my arms, just so I could get a few decent hours of sleep.

The other thing I forgot to tell the other mom was to try homeopathic or herbal remedies like camommile or something like that......there are so many homeopathic remedies for kids now....google it and I'm sure you'll find tons of info.

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H.B.

answers from Boston on

Try babies magic tea to soothe him. My little one was the same and he used to cry all the night leaving me crazy with bleary eyes. My elder sister asked me to try babies magic tea and it did work.

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K.H.

answers from Lynchburg on

there is no piont in not getting any sleep. It is a bad thing to be frustrated with your child(however I have been there myself). My advice to you is whatever it takes. If he still thinks he needs a bottle then do it. My child did the same thing. Get your sleep, therefore in the process getting unfrustrated, so your head gets clearer... my child was almost a year old before we broke the habit of getting up to feed him in the middle of the night. Better that then being too exhausted at work, or too frustrated to deal with everything you have to deal with during the day. My child still lays down with a bottle to go to bed, and when he wakes up we brush our teeth ho help avoid the "bottle mouth" but I work 6 days a week 9-14 hour days and i cant get to the point where i get frustrated with him crying for a bottle, or that i dont get sleep. good luck whatever you choose to do.

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C.

answers from Charlotte on

Hey L.,

Is there a certain way that he will sleep better? For example, if my son is on his stomach, he will sleep for hours longer than if he is on his back. Or have you tried using some kind of white sound like a box fan or something with a continuing noise throughout the night. My son sleeps well to the sound of the dishwasher.

About the debate whether to let him cry it out or not. Babies older than 6 months do need to learn some self soothing, but I think it more depends on the child's personality. For my son, there is no self soothing. The more you let him "cry it out" the more frustrated and awake he becomes. I think it will be a long time before he is able to settle himself. He is a very easily stimulated baby. My point is, if you think your baby is able to soothe himself, try letting him cry a little. Let him cry for 3 mins, then 5, then so on. If he doesn't seem to be able to handle it, go get him. I don't know if something like him in a pack and play beside your bed...or something like this...might help if it is seperation anxiety.

This is probably just a stage or a season anyway. I bet he'll be over it in a week or 2. It's probably just something you'll have to wait out, then he'll be back to his normal self.

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D.P.

answers from Raleigh on

Hi L.,
I just recently went through this very same thing with my 1 year old son. My son has always been a solid sleeper, so when he started waking up again at night crying and whining, I wasn't sure what to think as he was fine physically. Turns out, he started walking around this very same time. Once he conquered walking and passed this huge milestone, his sound sleeping at night returned. I really think that he was regressing a little bit and it took a couple of weeks to work it through the milestone. I think his brain was just in rapid fire mode and was interrupting his sleep. If your son isn't walking yet, it might be just around the corner! :)
One thing I want to add about cry-it-out vs. not cry-it-out. It is always the subject of heated debate. Just do what you feel is right. Whether you do decide to use CIO or not at all, your baby will be just fine, especially with a loving mother like yourself. Take if from a mother and baby who survived 4 months of daily uncontrollable, hour-upon-hour of screaming colic hell. This will pass. Take care! :)

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