Like any other mom, I'm super busy. I LIVE for the RARE days when there is nothing to do and nowhere to go so I can just rest or get on top of the housework. The older my kids get (single mom of three, 6, 4 and 3) the busier we get, and the more this is true.
It seems like every day, there is SOMETHING to do out and about--if not several things-- on top of the normal daily things that always need to be done. I'm trying to get on top of scheduling better. I've started doing the weekly shopping in advance of Sunday-(even though it makes the alternate day all that much more packed) so we can just STAY IN Sunday rather than having that one errand looming. Without ONE DAY a week to just avoid going out and getting presentable, I'm a mess. I'm homeschooling this year, so as our first Friday after a week of school (which went very well material-wise 8am to noon), my house is DEMOLISHED because my younger two "play" all over the house while I work with oldest. They sit in on a lot, and learn a lot, but there are still a couple of hours where they go off and play. Then we have lunch, afternoon obligations, errands, play dates, Tae Kwon Do classes etc, my gym time, dinner, early bed time what have you, so housework gets way behind. We don't have a daycare or housekeeping budget.
Today we were supposed to go across the street where a neighbor who is an "adopted grandma" to the kids wanted to give them a 3-in-one ice cream birthday party which is our custom since she goes to Florida all winter and misses them. It's super sweet of her and very easy to go over and enjoy some ice cream sandwiches for an hour. The kids have loved it the last two years in a row. I felt fine when I said we'd come. But today, I was rattled by the looming appointment because we are just so far behind on everything.
She called and canceled due to illness, and it was like the happiest moment of my week to have a suddenly free afternoon! Like, I could feel stress physically lifting off of me.
The same happened last week when we couldn't go to a friend's far-away art opening due to a bad storm, I was just so RELIEVED because I hadn't realized how really stressed I was. When my best friend canceled coming over last week for an evening-HOORAY! I didn't have to tidy house and go out and get wine and snacks...
Whenever anyone cancels anything, no matter how "fun" it was going to be, I'm just so GLAD it's canceled!! It's like, I don't know I'm stressed and over-scheduled until I feel the contrasting EXTREME RELIEF of cancellations....
Can anyone relate?
Yeppers... and we are nowhere near as busy as you are! ;)
I call it the introvert's delight when I can get out of social things. I love my friends, but seem to always find myself behind the eight ball getting out these days.
OMG yes! I remember the years and years of tball/baseball when the possibilities of tstorms were around, waiting by the phone for that call that the games been cancelled. Yahoo! A night off at home!
:)
I found your post very amusing and TRUE! Sometimes I am overjoyed when plans get cancelled and its not even because I didn't want to go. Its just that it opens up free time that wasn't there before. I can totally relate.
We are not terribly busy, but I still LOVE it when things are cancelled. It's a gift of free time! :)
1) Homeschooling for 5 years trick:
SCHEDULE 'stay at home' days ever week. For us it was Tuesdays. Nothing happens on Tuesdays most recently. Tuesdays were sit on our bum days. It's also been Wednesdays, Thursdays, or Fridays... all depending on the extracurricular and outside class schedule. 1 day a week was zip, nada, zilch scheduled. It wasn't that there was too much on the REST of the days, it was purely and simply that we needed a 'stay home' day.
& if possible
SCHEDULE a 'kids elsewhere' afternoon every week (my mum took my son monday afternoons from lunch until dinner, another family trades days with the cousins, another I know has a half day
It's an old, old, old joke: If it's called 'homeschooling', why are we never at home???
Because it's soooo true. 15 hours a day to fill means that a 'relaxing' day often involves 2-3 activities. Classes, field trips, playdates, park trips, errands, events, festivals... the list goes on and on and on. Homeschooling is BACKWARDS from awayschooling, in that as homeschoolers we typically have to create time AWAY from our kids (instead of trying to cram in family time... which we have in spades!).
2) My house has NEVER been as messy as when I was homeschooling. Because. We. Were. Using. It.
We actually started school at 10am FOLLOWING cleanup and freetime, and then had another 'blitz' right before dinner (dinner cooked and warming, quick blitz). It was the only way to keep the mess beaten back with a stick. And it wasn't perfect. But 20 minutes in the morning, and 10 minutes before dinner kept us from drowning.
It acutally gets WORSE the older the kids get, becuase school projects get 'bigger'. As in they'er going to take several days to complete. So they're out and about (along with all the supplies) for several days AND they're still kids, so still playing.
____
I was actually married when homeschooling, but as his dad was a) a jerk, and b) gone 80-120 hours a week... it was just "us". I HAD to schedule 'kiddo elsewhere' time (not only 1 afternoon a week, but also school break camps... I used those weeks during winter, midwinter, spring, and summer break to prep for the next 'quarter'), because no one was going to give me a break. It was me, on, 100% of the time.
LOL. I totally feel the same way!
I'm hoping the thunderstorms they're calling for this afternoon pan out so my son's football practice is over early. Then maybe he'll have time for dinner before boy scouts! :)
YES! We are all overscheduled these days. It's a gift when something is cancelled.
Oh, I so know what you mean! And I feel bad because I know in the middle of the winter when nothing is going on I am going to think "gosh, I wish we had somewhere to go so we could get out of the house!!!
Yep, I love cancelled stuff, it is so RELIEVING!
As a homeschooling mom I can totally relate! You want/need to get seatwork or lessons in. Then you want to make sure your kids have extra-curricular activities because you want them to pursue their interests as well as socialize with other kids. Then you also want to do homeschool outings so you can get some real-world experience. On top of that you have a house to run, meals to cook, shopping to do and other people to please. It gets hectic!
I have three suggestions. #1, turn your shopping into a homeschool activity! Sometimes I know if we want a day home to relax, that means I have to grocery shop during the week. But that also means that kids aren't doing homeschool. Or are they? So far my daughter has learned about different products, how to weigh things, how to calculate the price per pound, how to put meals together, how to make a grocery budget etc. When she was younger we focused on things like colors and sounding out words on the packages. She thinks going grocery shopping is more fun that I do! And she keeps a running total of how much we're spending.
#2 Make a written schedule. That helps me stay on track and also lets me see on paper if I'm overbooking.
#3 I allow ourselves one extra thing a week. Either a homeschool outing, a social thing or even some extra relaxing time. Anything more than that and I have to cancel something else. That keeps me from overbooking!
Good luck!
omg!! you have just expressed my secret shame!
NOTHING makes me happier than an empty day on the calendar EXCEPT when something gets canceled and surprises me with it! even if it's something fun!
:D
khairete
S.
Don't be your OWN worst enemy, you have the ability to plan activities and give your children guidelines where they can play in your home. Sounds like it would help if you eliminated "some" of your activities.....AND yes, sometimes I just jump for joy when something gets cancelled....THE GOOD NEWS, you also can cancel an event and let someone else "jump for joy."
YES YES YES~~~ I have to give it to the home schooling moms, that is something I could never do, I do not have the patience! Heck most times my kids have to wait for daddy to come home to help with their math! SO PROPS to you! And to stay ontop of everything else too, yes I would be very happy for something to be canceled in order to have some down or catch up time! Heck I am unemployed right now and kids are in school and I still cant get it together if my son's baseball practice my some miracle was canceled tonight I would be doing the HAPPY DANCE!
absolutely....lol!!!
yes, i like that too
I am amazed you are homeschooling 3 small kids, and I understand about the housework. You are brave!
I have four little ones and the ONLY way I stay on top of stuff and have time to breathe is when they are at school (preschool for 2, and first grade for the other, nothing for the baby yet). I have NO idea how I'd manage the house, cleaning, etc. and activities if they were home all day. The rare days they are all home, the house is a wreck! :)
If this happens, you are over-scheduled, and so are your children! I'm not sure why the younger kids have nothing to do when you are working with the older one, so you need to find a quiet activity for them. Are they preschool age or are you schooling them as well? They can certainly work on something - if not a structured worksheet, then quite reading time or drawing, nothing super crafty that requires supervision (like no glue and no scissors). Trashing the house is not a choice. You can let the housekeeping go and maybe have everyone take 15 minutes to help in straightening the "public" areas - maybe let the bedrooms go. I understand you want activities because the kids do not have the socialization opportunities during home schooling, but there has to be a limit. Create a tae kwon do day, an errand day, 1 play date a week, and so on. Can they go to a play date or a class while you are at the gym, or does the gym have a supervised play room? Little kids should not be in a ton of extracurricular classes every day of the week. They will benefit from structure, not go-go-go all the time. The stress on you will wear off on them, and that's not a good thing for anyone.
