How Do You Handle Two Children When Both Are 2 and Under?

Very carefully. :) My children are 14 months apart, so my first baby was only 14 months old when my son was born. It is difficult at first, but as time goes on you develop routines and learn what works for you and before you know it you're a pro! :) It does get easier as they get older. My children are 2 1/2 and 15 months now. I get compliments all the time, but honestly I am just doing what I have to do...nothing extraordinary, just being the best mama I can and taking care of my kiddos and running my household. :) You can do it! The first week I was terrified, but honestly it does get easier. :)

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There's no easy way to explain it other than to say we all felt the way you do when we were pregnant with # 2. So many of us have our babies in about the same spacing. It just comes naturally. You'll do fine.

you handle it the best you can. It will be ok. do the best you can, ask for help and paper plates can be your friend.

Plan on taking much more time to do everything and anything. If you think it will take you five minutes to move one child from the back door to the car seat, plan on fifteen. Plan for breakfast, lunch, and dinner to take at least twice as long as you expect. Slow down your timetable for everything.

This may not seem to go with college and work (and please remember that you *are* going to be tireder!), but it's the way to handle two babies and stay sane.

Talk to your toddler a lot. Involve her in everything. The "running commentary" technique can be a good thing. Talk to her at the store, at home. That's lots of positive attention right there. When it's time for her to know about little brother or sister, be excited, and she will be, too. Think of ways she can "help" you now, and she will be able to make the transition of "helping" you with the baby rather than feeling left out.

I had two aged two and under (approximately two years apart); actually, I had four in less than six years. If I can manage it, you can! Be strong and courageous! :^)

**If you can, get SOMEONE to come over and help.
So that you can study.
You cannot skip that. Or you will fall behind and not graduate.
Get some help.
Since your Husband is at work, those hours.
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So you have 2 kids now and a 3rd on the way?
You said you have a 19 month old and you refer to "my 2 year old..."

Your Partner... has to help.
It is not a choice, but a responsibility, for the Man or other Partner. Too.

Or get a Mommy Helper or Nanny.

My Husband goes to school, and works, and we have 2 kids.
It is not easy.
If he didn't have me around, he would sink the ship.
It takes TWO... to manage the kids/family ESPECIALLY when one Spouse/partner is going to school.
Studying and grades, are important. You cannot compromise that. Either.

AND it takes organization.
Getting help whenever you can or asking for help, from grandparents/family/friends etc.

Going to school AND working, takes ALL of my Husband's time. BUT... he puts in face time and time, with the kids. Too.
It is a 'have to', not a choice.
It takes BOTH partners, to make it work and the other Partner, KNOWING full well, that studying/school... takes a TON of time.... ALL the time. Too. Thus, they HAVE TO, help.
Or your schooling, will sink and fail.
What good is that?

When I was in college, my friend was pregnant.... and she was a single parent. HER family pitched in and helped. She went to school and graduated. ALL on her own and sheer willpower.
She did it. She was working too.
Going to school and working, despite morning sickness etc. She talked to her Professors, too. She did it anyway she could. And was resourceful and was not shy about asking for help.

Mine were less than 21 months apart and I actually liked it -- I got the child bearing over with, and on to the child rearing!

The newborn sleeps so much, giving big sibling a good amount of time to get used to the baby, take advantage when you can and read with big sis, have quiet momma time. Make her a Big Sister basket that only comes out during feedings -- special books or small toys that she can sit and play with that may hold her attention for the 20 minutes you need to feed.

Definitely get big sister involved as much as possible -- she can grab a clean diaper when it's time for a change, and encourage her to "distract" baby with songs or something. Try to send her signals that you know she'll be great, the more you worry the more anxious she might feel. You will have enough love and attention for both of them, so make sure she knows that.

My girls are 14 months apart. My oldest was excited about the new baby because we built it up for her. It was a little hard at first for her, but after a few weeks she understood that mommy loves both of them. It won't be as hard as you think after the baby is born. Your daughter is a little older than mine was when my second was born, so she will be fine. She is needy now because she is your only one. It will change. Good luck and God Bless.

My closest spacing so far is 19 months apart. When this baby is born, it'll be 15 months apart (ah!). I had my 19 month old be my buddy. He was still so little that he needed me too, so I had him help me with everything that he wanted too. If I needed a diaper, I'd have him hand it to me (only if he wanted). He got to hold the baby (with me right there) and was made to feel important and needed. To help him get his snuggles in, if I was sitting and holding the baby, I had his special spot be to perch next to me, holding my arm. It wasn't always easier that way, but I felt good knowing he was getting mommy time. He never seemed upset or jealous. He did really well with it. My next two were 22 months apart - similar story. You just be sure to include him. Sit on the floor and play with him as much as you can. You'll be busier, but for me, it wasn't as hard as I thought it would be to have two.

My first two were 12 months and 5 days apart and it wasn't that bad really. The main problem was that the oldest wasn't walking well when the second was born but not long until he was and I did stay home until he walked a bit better as I couldn't carry two. They played well when they were a bit older, slept in the same room, and it worked out well actually. It did take awhile to load up and do things, lots of diapers as I had cloth in those days, and yet it can work very well. Some of my others were 2 years apart and that also works well as the older one is helpful usually. I think it's just whether you can enjoy it all and not worry about things that aren't major or things that can be done in 10 or 20 years from now. :-)

My son was born 10 days before my daughter's 2nd birthday, my husband has recently gone from working nights (restaurant management) to traveling out of state 5 days at a time, and I work 50 hours/week caring for infants-2 year olds in my home daycare. What works for me is to decide who needs what first and who is better at waiting when they both need things (ie. bathe my daughter first, then my son so he can eat right afterwards and go to bed, since she can play while I feed him and then go to bed or let him fuss while I cook dinner then I eat super-fast so I can hold him while she finishes, since she's hungry, tired and getting cranky and he'll eventually doze off for a little bit). I tell my daughter what she'll "get to do" while I'm busy with the baby-she "gets to" sit on the potty seat and watch him get a bath, she "gets to" play with her toys while I nurse him, she "gets to" read the books in his room while I get him dressed. It makes it sound like a priviledge instead of a detriment when he gets my attention instead of her. I explain to her that her brother isn't good at waiting because he's a baby, but she is because she's a big girl. She's pretty independent (for a 2 year old) and is used to sharing me with the daycare kids already, so we haven't had any jealousy issues, but be sure to talk up how great it is to be a big sister before the baby comes. Once you figure out the baby's natural rhythms, a schedule, instead of feeding on demand, is a life saver! You need to know how long you have to do something before the baby needs to eat/sleep again in order to stay sane. Good luck!

My daughters are 15 months apart. You and your oldest will be just fine. You will get into a routine that works for you. Yep, you will be tired all the time. The older one adjusts and will not be quite so needy. There will be rough days and there will also be days when you absolutely revel in how wonderful both of them are and how cool that sibling relationship is.

Two things that really helped me:
Whatever room of the house you spend the most time in should be completely toddler proofed!
I prep lunches ahead of time so they just need to be heated up in the microwave and thown on the high chair tray. Fix your toddlers snacks and drinks the night before so when they want something, you can just pull it out.

We all felt the way you are feeling right now, but somehow it all works out.

My daughter was 18 months when I got pregnant with our twins. I was worried just like you. Our oldest was the queen of the castle, our whole world, and I coudn't imagine taking any attention away from her. She turned 2 three weeks before our twins were born. She never watched TV until they were born, but boy did it help get us through feedings. She wouldn't play on her own back then. But what a difference a year has made. It will probably be survival mode for the first few months. I highly recommend seeing if someone could help, evven a neighbor kid that could come over for a little while to play with her. Ours watched a show while I nursed. Then I tried to involve her as much as I could by having her sing songs and help read books. When the babies were down I tried to cram as much alone time with her as possible. ONce the babes hit 6 months and could sit on their own (and slept thru night!) things got so much better. Now they are 3 and 1 and play and laugh together. There will probably be negative attention-getting behavior but we just tried to only enforce a few rules and blow other stuff off. Your oldest will adjust and will likely grow up a lot in a short amount of time. It will be rough but so much fun watching her become a big sister. I just repeated my mantra - one day at a time and sang the songs "it won't be like this for long" and "you're gonna miss this" and it got me through. Have fun and congratulations!

I have 2.5 year old twins and a two week old baby, teach full time (on maternity leave right now) , and am currently working on my Masters degree. My husband and I work opposite shifts. He gets as much housework done during the day and I do what I can at night. I make sure I take time to play with my kids. My house may not be the cleanest, but my kids are happy. You oldest will have to adjust when the new baby comes, but have her be a helper and include her when you can. I'll read to my boys when nursing the baby, I'll ask them to bring me burp cloths, and make sure they know I haven't forgotten them. So far, so good!

I have twin boys that are 2 years old. I work out of my home and my husband is a pilot that has him gone for 15-16 days straight each month. I feed the boys together (if you nurse, you will find a schedule where you will work that out to nurse the baby and feed your daughter. In the mornings, your husband could help out with your daughter while you nurse your baby); I bathe them together (when your baby is old enough for the tub, you could bathe them together but in the meantime, maybe she could help you with that or at least have her feel like she's helping); and when it's time to put them down for a nap or at bedtime, I rock them for a few minutes to get them real tired and then put them in the crib. I do this separately.

It is easier when they are in the same room, but I pick the child that looks like he needs it the most and rock him first. If the other one is standing in his crib or whining, I tell him just a minute and to lay down. Then I place the first boy in the crib and then get the second one. Now, the second one knows that it's just a few minutes and it will be his turn.

You might already have a routine for your daughter to get her to sleep and I'd probably would stick to that as much as possible so there won't be too much change for your daughter. I probably would stress how great it is to have a little (brother or sister) and that this change in her life is good and try to have her involved without putting too much on her.

I know it can be hard and maybe your situation would be harder than having two babies the same age (who knows?) but I'm sure you will figure it out as you go. Just believe that when it seems impossible that it will probably just be like this for a few days until they learn that this is the new routine. Like they say, someone needs to hear something 8 times before they really get it or they have to do a routine 8 times before it becomes a habit. I think that's how it goes... : ) Anyway, you should be fine!