How Do I Explain Illnesses to My Children?

I would try getting some books from the library and explaining to them the illness in simple terms. The diabetic diet is actually very healthy and your kids may be better off because of it in the long run. Kids are bright and I'm sure if you tell them, Daddy's body can't process certain types of food and sugar like it is suppossed to-- so he has to watch what he eats and take medicine-- but he will be okay, they will catch on soon. Can you find a nice wig to avoid stares in public?

Good luck!

T.,

I would just be honest and explain things to your children in simple terms - let them ask questions or even go to a doctor's appointment with you (if the doctor's appointments are too intrucive). Most of all explain that people react to others that are different to themselves.

As long as you are honest with your kids they will get it - don't try to protect them from it - it will only make it harder in the long run to explain things.

-Mel

Have you asked your doctors if they have any books or material they use for kids that get diagnosed with these illnesses � or your pediatrician. I know your kids don�t have the illnesses, but material written for kids may make it easier for them to understand, at least for your 4 year old. I don�t think your 2 year old will be able to really understand any of it at this point. My 2 year old thinks that my hair in places she does not have hair is poop, and I can�t convince her otherwise.

I also have an illness I've had to explain to my children.
I've found that they aren't stupid or unobservant. Just explain things to them- be very honest. And don't answer any questions they didn't ask. In other words if they ask "Will you die?" You can tell them easily that you won't as long as you take care of yourself. It's honest, it's to the point.
If they ask, "Why are you sick?" You don't need to go into a full medical breakdown for it. A very simple, "Some people get sick with different things, and this is how I am sick..." will work.
The kids will appreciate the honestly more than you know. If you keep it mysterious, or too much information they will worry to themselves. If you tell them honestly, they will keep very optimistic but realistic views of it.

My children know that "Mommy is sick." When they are ready to ask me about it they learn, "Mommy has a headache." Only my oldest two know that I have a condition that mimics a brain tumor. Imagine trying to explain that to them... lol. They were worried everytime I had a headache until they learned that it wasn't a tumor and finally could understand what it is. Honesty works well with children. You don't want them to lie to you, so don't lie to them.

Keep things simple. YOu don't have to tell them you are "ill" or "sick because as you said, you aren't. Explain that sometimes peoples bodies forget what to do or need help keeping things in order and we have to help our bodies. With Diabetes you have to help regulate the sugar. They probably know what sugar is right? Explain that a lot of foods have sugar and we don't even realize it. It isn't all "junk food" or candy" that is high in sugar. Explain that since daddy has to help his body that you guys want to help him too and not make him feel left out. I think they will totally get it.
As far as Alopecia is concerened that is a little harder but just keep it simple. You could tell them that sometimes people hair falls out when they get older, sometimes when they are younger. Let them know it doesn't hurt you and that you are "okay" with it. (I'm sure it must be difficult only because my mother lost her hair recently for different reasons). Just let them know it is okay that bodies do weird things sometimes (and, if it is an issue, that neither you or your husband are sacared and they have no reason to be) THese are things you life with and go on (I know easy for me to say right?) What I mean is, that is the attitude that will help your children. That is the attitude we are using with my mom and not pity parting her and she respects that.
I know you are not asking for pity but I will pray for you guys. SOunds like your plate is pretty full. If you ever feel like chatting feel free to write me. I have gone through some life changing events lately and I am more than willing to listen to others who face similar struggles...

Dear T.,
Your situations are heart breaking. You are both so young. My first thought was, instead of explaining illness to your children, look for ways to get healthy. I'm sure you feel you've done that already, but if what you are doing isn't causing improvement, would you be willing to try something else? Diabetes can be reversed (wouldn't that be great?) I know less about alopecia but I received notice just yesterday of a live teleconference on the subject. It happens at 9:00 tonight and I won't be available to listen to it but if you would like to, I'll get you the information.
There are many, many testimonials of folks with worse conditions than either of yours who have been able to turn their health around. I'd love to help.

I have had a similar situation occur in my household. My husband has problems with spasms in his entire body, extreme exhaustion which my son has witnessed on several occasions. I finally sat him down and just explained things in a really simple manner to him. I didn't get too technical with him..I thought that would make it too hard to understand. Now, when daddy isn't feeling too good, my son comes and whispers to me "Mommy, I'll keep my eye on him for you." Kids are happy with simple explanations. And, as I'm finding are, are much more accepting and resilient to things that seem devastating to us. They always seem to see the birght spot that we can't!!! GOOD LUCK!!