Has anyone had a home visit for approval to foster a child? Would love to hear your experiences.
We have our home visit scheduled for next week and I’m not sure HOW *perfect* the house should be…. Do they want to see real life? Or are we aiming for the Lifestyles section of Better Living?
Our house is *reasonably* presentable... we pick up on a regular basis and do "heavy" cleaning every week or so. But, like, for example I’ve never CLEANED the fireplace. We’ve been in this house a little over a year and have never used it. So the logs provided by the landlord are still in the plastic wrapping!!!!! It’s kinda dusty in there… but there is one of those glass accordion stands in front, so it’s not obvious. Except that the corner of that is rusty. Is that a big deal? Should I replace it?
And the throw pillows on our couch are very old. They are clean….. just faded. Should I replace them or get rid of them? Do they look at stuff like that?
Also – I keep a dish drainer on the kitchen counter… for plastic Tupperware. It’s just always there and usually there is clean Tupperware drying, because we take it for lunch so then we wash and let it dry. Can it be there? Or should I hide it during the visit? I also keep our paper shredder on the kitchen counter, next to the garbage bags. Can I leave it there during the visit?
And our basement is FULL of boxes. It’s an unfinished part…. By the laundry. The boxes are kind of stacked up…. I’ve just been putting off going through them to downsize. Is it OK to have stacked boxes in the basement? We could put a lock on the door and lock out that part of the basement.
Guess I’m saying that while I like our house…… a photoshoot for Better Homes and Gardens it is not.
I’m just not sure HOW nice it needs to look, or what they are actually looking for. I would love to hear what that experience was like for you.
Thanks. My brain had started to spiral!!!!!! I guess when you start to stress about throw pillows you know it's time to chill :-)
We are going to request licensing/approval for kids *infant to 7*, either gender and up to 2 (or 3 if there would be a sibling involved). We would be OK to either Foster or foster-to-adopt.
In Missouri they also have a "transitions" program where you would essentially foster an OLDER kid.... like 16 or 17 (maybe a teen mom or pregnant teen.... or just an older teen who they feel could really benefit from learning additional "life skills" to transition to college / working) and we are open to that as well. We have a 12 year old (from my previous marriage) and I know sometimes they say it's best not to "displace" the birth order of existing bio kids. So, we'll have to see.
They are mainly looking for safety concerns. Like plug covers in the outlets, are the outlets grounded, I know some people that didnt get approved because they thought their septic tank might be overflowing, really it was just damp in the backyard from heavy rain. I would clean up like you normally would, but no need to buy new pillows.
They want to see real life. So clean like you normally do and don't over do it trying to make everything perfect!
Leave the fireplace and the throw pillows and the dish drainer where and how they normally are! Everything will be fine!
Don't go out and buy all that child proofing others have mentioned until you know you actually need it. Relax, they will give you a checklist IF there is anything you need to change or fix!
Kudos to you for taking on the extra responsibility of a foster child! Good for you!
~I am not a foster parent only a former foster child!
They want to see your house as it normally is. Of course pick up a bit before the visit as you would if a friend were coming over. The purpose of the visit is to see where the foster child will sleep and to know that the house is safe. Definitely do NOT buy new stuff or move the things you mentioned out of site. the boxes are OK as long as they're not next to the furnace which would be a possible fire hazard. They are a part of everyday living and are perfectly acceptable.
I was a foster parent and have taken children to foster homes. Please try to relax. This visit is just routine and only done to know more about the home in which a foster child will reside. Safety is the main issue. A side issue is how comfortable you are in your own home. They definitely expect your home to look lived in.
BTW at this point you do not need to have done all the child proofing mentioned by Bug. They will tell you at this visit what needs to be done. Unless you're fostering toddlers much of what she mentioned doesn't ever have to be in place. I suggest that the home she's describing happened after the first visit and even then her friend may have decided on her own to do some of these things.
If you try to hard to make sure your home meets all possible safety standards you won't know if you're over reacting or not. Of course, maintain the common sense strategies that you already have in place.
If you go out and buy and install and lock up all the things that Bug suggests you won't know what is actually required by CSD. Look at this visit as a way to learn what is required in addition to what you already have. Some examples. I never did take a child to a home with a fenced back yard, a lock on the basement door or even locks on all cabinet doors and drawers, tho locking up medicines is a good idea for any home. I had cleaning supplies under the kitchen sink and in the lower cabinets without locks. My shredder was on the floor.But then I was certified for school age children.
One of my aunts is a foster mother. They are mainly looking to see that your house is comfortable, and safe. Yes, thet want it to be clean (no bugs, no visible dirt, etc), but it is more about safety. The boxes in the basement could be an issue, simply from the standpoint of could they topple over on a child? Try to condense, and make it more presentable. I wouldn't worry about the throw pillows, or the dish drain. I would put away the shredder simply as it could be a hazard with plug ins. I would take the plastic off teh logs (fire hazard), and replace the screen if it is damaged.
Otherwise look around and see what could be a safety issue. That would matter more than things being pristine and new.
Good Luck!
I'm pretty sure you can relax about this. They want to see how you really live, so they can gauge the environment for general cleanliness and health and fire hazards. There are probably points given for neatness, but not for home fashion.
We were easily approved for a foster child (many years ago) WHILE we were living in my mother's garage, as we were slowly building a house nearby. My daughter and foster daughter shared a room we rented in my mom's house for several months. It was just a middle class "regular people" home, complete with dish drainer on the counter and boxes filling half of her sewing room.
We have been foster parents for nearly 3 years and just adopted our foster son. Your house sounds like ours. Don't go over the top .... They just want to see things are safe and not falling down around you, no hoarding, healthy, etc. Breathe deep ... It's really not that big of a deal ...
We were checked out as adoptive parents and 2txtots is right, they just want to make sure its clean and safe. I applaud you for becoming foster parents, so many kids need a home...
They want it clean but are mainly concerned that it is safe and free of hazards for children. Outlet covers, no hanging cords, no access to dangerous equipment, fence around pools or jacuzzis, medicines and cleaning supplies up high and locked, everything you would do to childproof a home.
I have a friend who had several things to remedy after the initial visit, they gave her a list and came back a week later to make sure she'd complied.
Sounds like your house is absolutely ready! They want to know you have room for this child, could share a room with the same sex children. Childproofing is totally up to what is the age of the child... with adoption the first home visit was done long before we knew the age or sex of the child, I think the child's room was not ready until a later visit. I made sure my dog looked clean and groomed, and his water and food dish was clean cuz I felt that reflected on my ability to care for a small child!! I did not stress over the cleanliness of the teenager's rooms! Try to relax!
It doesn't have to be house beautiful. The extent that a social worker checks your house really varies by social worker. Mostly, they want to see that it is a safe environment that is a standard level of clean. You may want to be sure to have working smoke detectors, a small kitchen fire extinguisher and that you don't have any poisons/poisonous liquids out or readily accessible to children. If you have pets, they need to be friendly (don't have to be obedience superstars but do need to be non-aggressive).
My friend was approved and she is filthy. But she has a loving home and spends a lot of time with the kids.
I think they are not looking for picture perfect. They are going to be dropping in your home for months if not years. They are going to be seeing your home in all sorts of times of day, when a kid has gone off and trashed it, when you're prepared and it's perfect. So don't go to all sorts of extremes.
Be clean if possible but don't worry about perfect. That's a bit of a OCD thing they might not really want to see.
My home is clean but definitely lived in, and I had no problem getting licensed. They only checked to make sure I had working smoke detectors and suitable beds. My house was already very baby proofed as I have a home daycare. I'm not sure if that is why it was so easy. The licensing worker just kinda took a perfunctory tour of my house. She literally just peeked in the bedrooms and bathroom.
Its amazing. We can have our biological children in homes with cardboard boxes, shredders, and the like--but we gotta move it for foster children (who have lived in worse).
But its true! I went through the classes years ago.
