Help! How Do I Keep My Son in School- Kindergarden.

I agree witht hose that said to think about homeschooling him. I started homeschooling my kids over a year ago and it was the best decision! I would much rather have them with me learning my values then with a stranger learning theirs. I belong to 2 great groups in both Oakland and Macomb counties. If you want more info just send me a message!

How about homeschooling him? You said, "I know in my heart I'd rather he be home everyday too", why not keep him home and teach him.
Don't be too afraid either, you CAN teach your child. :)
Email me if you'd like to discuss it further. We've got six children and have been homeschooling for seven years.

ps-It's really fun learning with them, to see their faces light up when they understand something. I wouldn't trade those moments for anything. And don't worry about socialization, there's plenty of that for homeschoolers.

Good chance your son is picking up your vibe about school. Even if you don't say your concerns out loud, children pick up amazing things. He may be trying to stay home to please your unspoken wish to have him home with you.He may be picking up some of your fears and concerns. Please try to develop a positive attitude about his being away in school. Since you had a recent death in the family ( or stillbirth, I am not sure which you mean), there is an excellent chance that you are feeling emotionally needy, and your loving son is trying to help by being home for you. May God comfort you, and give you the strength to let your little bird fly from the nest without showing your fears or concerns.
L.

It sounds like he may have a little separation anxiety going on. Talk to his teacher and see how he's behaving in the class room, what's his activity level like, just a general idea. I would also ask the teacher for advice. However, I would also talk to the teacher and office staff and request that they not allow your son to call home, unless he's puking sick. Time will make it better, but it's easier to start the "break" now then to allow him to call home or come home early for several weeks and then try to fix the problem. I know it is easier said then done, but it will be easier for both of you to make the adjustment now. Eventually, he'll make friends and get caught up in the daily routine and forget what it was like to stay home all day long!

You might want to try sending him a picture of the family, so he can see you.
I worked at a preschool 2 years ago and found that worked great to help your child deal with being away from you for a while.
Hope it helps,
D.

M.,

I can empathize with you because I had a similiar experience. I raised my kids to believe I would always be there, too and could not find the words to explain to my son why I suddenly wasn't when he began school. I struggled against everything in me to leave him everyday when I wanted him to be hjome with me and that's where he wanted to be, too. Looking back, if I had to do it again, I would be there for him and comfort him and try to encourage him to stay a little longer each time. I would make the school adhere to allowing him to call me and I would comfort him on the phone. He just neds to know you are still clsoe by and he can get to you if he neds you. I think it is commendable to you as a great mom. Just let him take his time transitioning. It is a loss for him and you and he is grieving. Some moms cry the first day their child goes off to school and some rejoice-we all do it differently. And no one tells the moms they are doing it wrong or gives them a timetable to adjust. Help him transition and continue to show him you are still there for him. You are a great mom and you'll both adjust-in your own time. p.s. my daughter went to Heaven at 19 yrs of age.

Have him examined, maybe, to see if there's something besides anxiety that's making him sick.

Other than that, send him to school with some soda crackers to munch on when he starts feeling sick. But this is normal for a kindergartner. Separation anxiety. Give it time.

He only knows what you teach him. You are teaching him that even when he can't see you, you will always be there for him to come home to. You are also teaching him how important school is even when it's not so fun, that it's okay to enjoy activities away from home, and it's okay to like to come home, too. It's fine to tell him that you'd love for all of your family to stay home together all day, but that's just not reality. I also think that he needs to know that he CAN call home if he needs to, just for reassurance. I talk to my husband several times a day...not because we need to talk....we just like to hear each other's voices. Same thing...

I think you'll find that the more he is allowed to 'need you' the safer he will feel to venture off and discover the world...he'll always know that mom will be there. Of course, that's a big lesson to learn, but it has to start small...and kindergarten is the perfect time to make that adjustment.

~L.

Hi M.,

I went through the same thing with my first. He loved school at first, got sick, and never wanted to go back. I too, wanted him to stay with me -boy the heartstrings can be strong!

Have you ever considered homeschooling? It's an option open to you, if you really feel pulled that way. There's a lot of information and support both on the internet and within most communities. If you need further info, please email me.

By the way, I didn't homeschool my oldest. I did keep our youngest home a year and did a little homeschool/preschool. My sister is homeschooling 2 of her children.

Warmly,

S.

You could read him the book "The Kissing Hand" it is about a little raccoon who doesn't want to leave his mommy. You could also give him a picture keep with him so he can always see you. One of my daughters friends wore the picture in a photo id badge holder thingy around his neck.
This is a hard time for both mom and child. I have the opposite she runs for the bus everyday and doesn't even look back. That too makes me sad...but also happy.
blessings, K.

Have a talk with his teacher to find out what is going on to make him so insecure. She might have some suggestions on how to best handle the situation.

I noticed you had a loss of a child...........so sorry for you :( Since this was not too long ago could your son be picking up on your emotions, and wants to be there for you? I think seeking counseling would be great. That kind of a loss effects the WHOLE family. Blessings to you :)

I think many of the other posters here have good comments but I would like to add that I think this is very common at this age - my daughter went through it in 4 year old preschool. She got sick at school and was afraid of it happening again. It took a while to get her through it but I talked to the teacher (who said it was quite common) and we each assured her that she probably wouldn't get sick at school but that if she did her teacher was there to take care of her and that they would call me right away if she was sick and I would come and get her. Are the calls home helping him get through the day? I would probably discourage that so that he is not thinking about it so much and hopefully will focus on all the fun going on in class. I think just lots of encouragement and time will take care of it. Best Wishes!