Help for 2 Year Old

I second the play therapy.
My nephew and his family are stationed there. They are so happy there because there are so many family activities--much more than the other base. The moms there seem to be very open and friendly. So maybe connecting with them could help.

I remember when my daughter was two, I also wanted to have therapy for her. Couldn't find it for her, so I started it for me and got some help there. I also joined a Co-op preschool that had parent education once a month. It was really wonderful to have that support and education. I recommend it highly. Since you are on a military base, do they have a co-op preschool?

In the meantime, I would like to give these little bits of advice: Your daughter sounds like she is very sensitive and intelligent. If you could look at her emotionality as positive rather than negative--for example sensitive and intelligent--it might help your relationship with her.

I had a daughter that was highly sensitive, intelligent, emotional, and she had a lot of temper tantrums to go with it. It helped (!) me to view her emotionality as sensitivity rather than willfulness. She still had plenty of tantrums, but I handled them differently.

Try to figure out what things stress her out. Make sure she eats well--limit sugars, etc. Make sure she is sleeping enough. Set up a routine and stick up to it. Watch out for things that scare her. (my daughter was scared of heights and monkeys) Watch out for noisy situations, large rooms full of people talking. Some kids can't handle that. Things like that.

And things will get better. You are in the twos. The trees will be hard too, but you will love the fours.

Hi HAJ,
first of all, your family is special for sacrificng so much for the US! I would talk to my daughter and tell her the truth. That you and dady love her so much, and that your home is together wherever you are all together. you regret having to move so much. daddy is serving his country and we are proud of him....while I am only a mommy to a 3 year old, i find that he understands everything I tell him and explain to him. If I speak with not a nice tone and apologize for that and explain to him that I was overtired, but this is no excuse....he literally gets it...

you can reassure her that you promise to consistently love her even as you move around and that you hope to settle soon....

hope this helps a little.

Jilly

Is there a local university that has their students practicing 'play therapy'?

Thank you for your husband's service to our country, and your family's sacrifices.
Do check with other parents on base to see if there are support services available.

Also check out these sites I found online:
http://www.zerotothree.org/about-us/funded-projects/milit... (Awesome site offering an email newsletter, and free books, brochures, etc. to help you help your child(ren.)
http://www.ourmilitarykids.org/ (Offers a grant you can apply for to pay for participation in sports, fine arts, camps, and tutoring programs that nurture and sustain children while a parent is away in service to our country or recovering from injury.)
http://www.deploymentkids.com/
http://www.sesameworkshop.org/initiatives/emotion/tlc
http://learn.nctsn.org/course/category.php?id=10
http://www.operationhomefront.net/wehelp.aspx (Assistance to military families in various situations.)

Remember, you're not alone and many people care for you.
God bless.

If you want professional support maybe a family therapist would be a good choice. I did this before having my kids--family and child therapy with child protective services families and foster/adoptive children. You can do play therapy with kids as young as preschoolers. With younger kids I spent part of the time talking to the parents and sometimes showing the parent ideas of how they can help their child. With toddlers you have to do most of the talking--naming their emotions, describing what you are doing, etc.

I read some of the Happiest Toddler in the block book and the authors seemed to really understand toddlers. They have a video too but I haven't seen it yet.

Toddlers thrive on routine so it would likely help to have a consistent daily schedule and visit local places (grocery store, park, library story hour, etc). Describe where you are and remind her about last time you were there and did whatever. My daughter is just a few months older (32 months) and she is still at the stage of saying "again" for everything she likes. So indulge her when you can with doing things repeatedly (I limit it to 3 repetitions at a time for the sake of my own sanity). Also, a bag of inexpensive outside toys (pail and shovel, ball , toy trucks, etc. get doubles of most) can be great for giving opportunities to learn sharing and other social skills. When the situation comes up teach your child whatever skill is needed: taking turns, sharing, asking to play and introducing herself. asking for a toy back, etc.

Hi,
I'm surprised by some of the answers or maybe the way people answer below...goodness! I think it's great that you're aware and are reaching out.

The first thing I thought was maybe a local church? I'm not an overly religious person but even if you have more moves, a church could be a familiar place for her everywhere and the pastor's might be able to connect with her and it might not cost you anything.

Good luck to you!

Therapy for a 2 year old? No! Oh, my, as if this country doesn't have enough people seeing therapy already.... Good advice from Jilly. Talk to your daughter and reassure her. She doesn't need counseling. She needs more support. Your best source of support for the two of you would be family (even if it's connecting via the Internet, phone, etc. it would help) and also other military families who know what you're going through.

My husband is a veteran and he grew up in a military family. I know for a fact kids DO get stressed from that and it's not just what they feel from their parents. One issue that tormented my husband was bullying. He was always bullied because he was always the new kid--and they were in some rough neighborhoods then. He had to deal with that on his own. That doesn't have to be the case with your daughter-- I mean, coping with it on her own and suffering for years. As others have said, it's possible to live a happy life even for a military family with all its sacrifices. But be strong, you and her dad, and use whatever means you can to connect her to family.

How to help her feel safe and trust more? You can make her feel safe and that she can trust you by giving her all the love you can (as I'm sure you do). But you really can't change a child if she's not trusting or doesn't like change in the environment. Some people handle that better than others. With your love and encouragement, I'm sure she'll learn to handle it and come out on top. :)

Thank you for your sacrifice. I hope and pray your husband comes home safe and sound to you soon. The sooner, the better! Sorry that this isn't much help. Take care of yourself and your little one!

I know you said psychologists won't treat kids under 7, but maybe you and your husband can talk to a family therapist that can give you some parenting tips for this situation.

Here is a great resource for finding a therapist. I plugged in Spokane, since it is close to you, but you can change the location, if necessary:
http://therapists.psychologytoday.com/rms/prof_results.ph...

We're a military family as well. My 5y/o has been going to play therapy (fully covered by Tricare & you don't need a referral!) since he was 3 (& probably needed it sooner but I didn't realize it was available without a referral & his docs didn't seem to care since his problems weren't 'severe enough' in their opinions). There is a child guidance office on post where he goes now, but earlier he saw a civilian near our home (he's seen social workers, although there are psychologists available as well). The base where my husband is stationed has a New Parent Support Program, which I think many bases have, & they are a wonderful resource! I highly recommend looking into whether this is available where you are, as they can help steer you in the right direction. Good luck!

It may be normal 2 year old stuff. Kids are actually very adaptable and only know what they know. I have family members that do a lot of missionary work. They haul toddlers all over the globe, sleeping on floors and in tents etc. We traveled a lot when my first was about 18 months-2 years, and my husband travels 8-10 months out of the year. I've always assumed the kids were fine with it and they seemed to be. However, they did have all their normal "testy" stuff and upsets, same as my friend's kids who were home with no disruptions.

I personally wouldn't bother looking for a toddler psychologist if those exist. If you are upset by all the disruptions, you can seek counseling for yourself, and your feeling better will help her a lot too. She may be feeling your stress from stressing about her! Make sure she plays enough and feels well loved, it's all any child needs.

Also, my dad was in the Air Force, served in Viet Nam most of my toddlerhood, and we moved several times during that time with no money etc. I was fine. My mom kept a stiff upper lip and we thought it was all normal. Kids are resilient. Try not to worry too much. Just keep giving her love and support.

There are psychologists who do play therapy with children. Most are Jungean trained.
Is your husband going to remain in the military? If not there will be big adjustments when he gets out. Of course I always advise leaving the military since it is a life style that does not support life.
To all who read what I've just said and don't like it I'd like to remind you I've been caught in wars personally and shot at. I speak from experience.

I bet if you ask other mother's on your base they would have some good recommendations for you.