Getting a 4.5 Month Old to Sleep Through the Night

Hi N.,
First of all, be sure she is getting enought to eat during the day. Be sure to record how many ounces it is if you are bottle feeding.
Secondly, do not feed her between meals. Feeding should be every four hours at this age. Even if you need to carry her around for the last half hour. This way, she will be very hungry when she does eat, and will fill up and get enough to hold her over till the next feeding.
At night, try getting up and giving her a pacifier rather than a feeding. Pat her untill she goes to sleep. Alternatively, you definitely can let her cry it out, starting with the middle of the night feeding. It only takes three days to change a baby's habits and schedule. Babies as well as adults benefit greatly from a regular schedule.
Once she gets a good 6 hour stretch down pat, you can tackle the next feeding you wish to eliminate. Some families like to give a "power feeding" before they go to bed, even though it hasn't been four hours. i.e. if she ate at 8pm, you could try feeding her again just before you retire, i.e. 10pm. I have been involved in Baby Nursing for the past 14 years, and have run a nanny service for the past 24 years, and there are consultants who can either come over for a couple of hours and advise you or even do it over the phone. Alternatively, you could hire a baby nurse to come at night for one week, and she could train the baby within that time. The Baby Nurses have lots of "tricks" they use to gently ease the baby into sleeping 7 pm to 7 am, usually by 7-8 weeks. Once the baby has doubled in birthweight, she is ready to start sleeping through the night.
The best gift you can give your baby is a well-rested Mom!
Recent research has shown that a Mom who gets 7 hours of sleep uninteruppted will regain her pre-pregnancy weight by the baby's first birthday. Sleep is more important than food.
Also, babies who learn to self-soothe grow in confidence and happiness, and homes and babies on a good schedule are happy, quiet & pleasant & when they get older, they do the best in school academically.

I have four well adjusted, loving kids... but were very poor sleepers. I took them back to bed with me and snuggled up. Everyone slept well to face the new day. If you do some historical social research, this is exactly what was done for ages.

N.,
She is only 4 months old! She needs to be getting up and eating. Do not let her cry it out, I think that is ridiculous. My children are 2 and 5 and they still get up in the middle of the night. I don't believe in forcing a 4 month old on a schedule.

Feed her/him rice cereal before bed. At least then you'll know if he/she is waking because of hunger.
I had wanted to breastfeed solely for as long as possible, but then Doc said that I should start feeding my babygirl solids 'cause her weight was dropping off the curve. The first night I gave her rice cereal with breast milk, she slept all the way through.

No child is the same. I am not a believer to let a 4.5 mos old cry it out either. They are young, need lot's of cuddling and reassurance not to mention they are so in "need" at that age. My son ate every 4 hours until he was 10 mos old. My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was 13 mos. Each child has it's own internal clock. Really, be there for her, comfort her, after the 8 mos mark then maybe let her fuss a little longer each time but at 4.5 mos she is still so young and needs mommy/daddy. Until a baby is older there is no way to gage when their tummies are full enough. Hang in there, be patient. I think after a year that is when to not form habits or jump when they cry at night, however she is just an infant and her feeling secure is the best.

Every baby is different, and you can't expect one to do what the other did. Also, if you let your baby CIO, they think no one is there for them, and they just give up. They don't actually sleep though the night, they wake up as often, they just don't cry out for you because they think no one is there for them, which is not only really sad, but also not the way to teach them this world is a trusting place. Babies rarely slept through the night that young, until we started getting impatient and seeing it as a inconvenience, instead of a time to love and bond with our child. They are only little once, and it won't last forever. Also, don't forget that babies have emotional needs, just like we do. You don't want to ignore those. Their tummies are also very little (the size of their fist), and they don't stretch like ours do, so they empty very quickly.

I helped my son sleep better (1 or 2 hour stretches of sleep at night to 6 or 7), by using very gently methods found in:

The Sleep Book by Dr. Sears
The No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantly
Sweet Dreams: A Pediatric's Guide To Your Child's God Night Sleep

Here's a few helpful websites:
http://www.askdrsears.com/html/7/T070100.asp

Hang in there!

At 4.5 months I don't believe a baby should be sleeping through the night. You do what you are already doing. Your baby obviously needs comfort and food still through the night.

I fed my youngest girl who did the same thing just a tad bit of cereal in her bottle just before bedtime, to fill her up more. She was not getting enough to keep her satisfied very long. I also had to open up the nipple just a tad well so it could pass through. But do not leave your baby alone with the bottle (with nipple slit open). Do not risk your baby choking!!!!! I watched mine extremely close and she started sleeping much longer through the night!

LW

i'll be interested to hear some answers to that one as well. My son is 9 months and i have the same problem! A few things that seem to work pretty well are putting a heating pad on the mattress before i am going to lay him down and of course taking off before i do, but this makes the sheets warm so he doesn't get disturbed, and the other idea is music or white noise playing at a good volume and not too softly. Good luck! A good book is called "The No Cry Sleep Solution" by Elizabeth Pantley. L.

I would suggest letting her cry for about ten or fifteen minutes before going to her. With my son I would go to him as soon as he started crying, but once I started waiting I found he often put himself back to sleep. Also having her in her own room may help. The less she hears you the more likely she is to stay asleep. Another thing that helped my son was to not have a light on in the room. Other than that maybe feed her a little less every night so maybe it isn't worth it to her to wake up. Good luck....

Hey, N.
I am a mom of two little girls. In response to your question regarding getting you 4.5 month little girl to sleep through the night... my oldest like yours slept through the night, but my youngest, 5 months, wakes up like clockwork at one then four then seven. Durring the night, when she starts to get fussy I give her her passifier, and most of the time that works. Once in a while I will need to change her, or feed her. I personally wouldn't recomend letting her cry it out, because it is stressful to the two of you.

Is she eating solid food yet? If not, it might be time for a little more sustenance during the day. If she's eating solids and getting plenty of calories during the day, there is nothing wrong with letting her cry it out. She is probably just waking up and doesn't know how to put herself back to sleep. with my first son, the cry it out method only took about 2 nights. Good luck!

This isn't much advice, but my daughter did the same thing until about 9 months. I did quit feeding her at about 6 or 7 months as I think by that age it was more habit than a true need to nurse. I also stopped picking her up and opted to instead just rub her back and gently sing. Eventually the times between wake ups got longer and by 9 months we were at a solid 10 to 11 hours.

Hi N.-your daughter seems like just a different baby than your son. According to my doctor, a five hour stint for a baby that age is actually sleeping through the night. Has she ever slept longer than 4 hours? If it's just recent, it could be a development or growth spurt or, if she's a larger or much smaller baby, she could just need to eat more. It could also be that if you're working a lot, she is just looking for some reassurance that you are there. There's a great book--the no cry sleep solution by elizabeth pantley--it really helped me with my daughter and helps you to better address what's happening. there are really helpful charts & work pages to help you figure out a pattern. Good luck!

Hi,
I used to rock, hold tight and sing to my son. then I put him in his crib and he would sleep throught the night

Girl, you got lucky on the first one. This is totally normal behavior for a 4.5 month old. I really don't believe that crying in out is good idea. Not only is it (in my opinion) really traumatizing, it also doesn't work a lot the time. In addition, she probably still needs the feeding. Hunger really doesn't help a good night's sleep. I recommend reading The No Cry Sleep Solution and also Dr. Sear's Sleep Book. Good luck.

Hello N.. I had this same thing happen to me when my son was this age. I would let him cry it out. As heart breaking and mean as it may sound it works. Catering to the late nights will only end up prolonging this and burning you out. If that doesn't work, try playing classical music on a low volume throughout the night. This worked really well for me.

I did the "let them cry for 3 days" Plan.. I forget where I heard it, but it works.. Of course make sure they are all cozy and warm with fresh diaper and fed. Then.... put them in bed and get ready for heart break! ha ha ha.. seriously! Let them cry! By the 3rd night I literally put on my sons crib night light and he looked and me and rolled over and went to sleep.. That made me kind of cry too! Good luck!

I have a three month old who started sleeping through the night when I started swaddling him. He started sleeping through the night at about 10 weeks. Good luck!

Dear N., This isn't exactly advice on sleeping through the night... it's about something else I noticed in your request that used to stump me too. I know I did this more than once. I would compare the behavior of my children... ex your older child was sleeping through the night at 11.5 weeks and somehow you had the expectation your baby would do the same. I was surprised more than once at the differences in my children. Their timing was quite different. After a while I realized that baby 2 wasn't a clone of baby 1 and it was much easier to accept each day and child as they unfolded. Hope this helps you.

I have a 2 1/2 year old and a 9 month old. My older child slept through the night at 3 months too, but the younger one still isn't sleeping through the night. It is really hard, especially if you are working, but I think you need to lower your expectations. Your baby might not be ready to sleep through the night for some time, and at least the baby goes back to sleep easily. Sometimes we are up for hours during the night trying to get that little nightowl to sleep. It became much more manageable for me once my husband got in on the act and started getting up. We found that when my husband went in, the baby didn't need to eat to fall back asleep. Now, at 9 months, she wakes up after about 3-4 hours. My husband goes in and gets her back to sleep, and then she wakes up again sometime between 3 and 5 a.m., when I get up and feed her. I try to go to bed no later than 10 so I can get enough sleep for working the next day. I also recommend the No Cry Sleep Solution by Elizabeth Pantley; she provides good alternatives to crying it out, which should be your absolutely last option. She tells you how to set up the baby for a good night sleep, which is very important.

It's frustrating when you need to get a full night's sleep and can't! My second baby was the same way. Unfortunately, if she's crying every 3 to 4 hours and goes back to sleep after eating, she's definitely hungry and you shouldn't let her cry it out. Is she on formula or breast milk only? If she is on formula, you can try adding a small amount (2 to 3 tsp) of rice cereal to her bottle at bedtime. This fills them up more and helps them sleep through the night. It worked like a charm for my son as well as a good friend's baby!

You will have to watch bowel movements closely, as sometimes the rice cereal can cause some constipation, and can add clear Karo syrup (I added about 1 tsp to a 6 oz. bottle) to counteract that. Be careful, because sometimes it works TOO well! As always, be sure to ask your pediatrician if he/she is okay with the above additions to diet.

Good luck and good sleeping!

One idea is to make sure he/she is not too hot or too cold. I never really thought of that until my sitter mentioned it when our son was not sleeping as well through the night. I put footsies on him and he would stay asleep and take them off if he would wake up and the house was warm. Just a thought! I understand, I work too!

I have a 4 1/2 month old as well. Just started feeding him rice cereal mixed with formula & water at his nightly feeding, which is 10pm. He gobbles it right up and then he has 3 ounce bottle and has been sleeping through the night.

At 4 1/2 months, it's just a habit to eat during the night (depending on how much the baby weighs and eats during the day.) That said, I would pick the feeding that you like the least to get up for and work on cutting that one out first. Feed the baby for less time (if the baby's breastfed) or feed him/her less formula at that feeding. Gradually decrease the time/amount of food for a few nights. After a few nights, hopefully he/she will sleep through the feeding once he/she realizes that there's nothing to wake up for. When the baby sleeps through that feeding, start on the other feeding. Good luck! :)

Personally, I would never put cereal in a bottle unless directed by your doctor. However, if you haven't started slids just yet, maybe it's time to start some rice cereal during the day.

Also, some babies take longer to sleep through the night. My 2 year old was sleeping through the night at 7-8 weeks. Brooklyn has only had about 10 nights in the last two months that she has slept through the night. Knock on wood, she has slept through the night the last three nights so maybe she's finally gonna be sleeping through the night for good?

And finally, do you put her to bed asleep or does she put herself to sleep once you put her to bed? I would try letting her talk/cry it out at first. If she is still awake, go in there, pat her little bum and soothe her, and then leave again. I wouldn't go in right away and pick her up. Good luck!

My daughter did this. What worked for me....You are going to have to just led her cry. She knows that it is effective in getting mama up.. It is tough. but it worked for me. And guess what. It only took two nights. It immediately worked. They don't know it's night. Try it, you might be shocked. Hope it works for you;

Maybe a little cereal in her bottle so it sticks in that little tummy... also, crying only makes her lungs stronger, if you can take it, try it out! Will let her know that everytime she cries you aren't coming to get her... we started out with the 20 minute rule... if they are still crying after the time maximum you set then go in... more often then not...my kids went back to sleep. Hope you get more restful nights soon!