Depression

Well, first of all don't feel embarrassed, most women go through this at one stage in their life or another, even if they won't admit it. I went through a depression almost exactly at the same stage of raising children that you are.

One of the best books that helped me through it was "Learned Optimism - How to Change Your Mind & Your Life" by Martin E.P. Seligman, Ph.d. Learning how to recognize and interrupt my negative thought patterns helped me get back on the right track, plus I learned about how the brain chemically functions and what is going on. Another book that helped me laugh through the trials of motherhood and gave me some good coping advice is "What No One Tells the Mom" by Marg Stark. I also started walking, getting proper nutrition, and doing yoga when I could squeeze it in. It's hard to force yourself to do all this for yourself when busy with little ones and depressed but make baby steps and it will get better.

I don't have much time in my busy day but if I can even squeeze in my 20 min PM yoga video before I go to bed, it at least helps me feel centered and that I've done something for myself. I have a hard time eating right, but I take URIlife whole food juice powder that tastes good and only takes a few seconds to add water and drink. Their supercharged version gives me an energy boost when I'm feeling run down (with natural caffeine from green tea and other herbs). Contact me privately and I can send you a free sample. www.urilife.com/NutritionForLife/products.html

The biggest thing is to ask for help and take time out for yourself. It also helps to have someone to talk to (which it sounds like you've found through a psychiatrist). Don't be afraid to talk to other moms or your friends to get their support and ideas that help.

You're not alone! Don't hesitate to contact me or reach out to others you feel safe talking to.

A little about me:
Work-from-home Mom of very active 3 yr and 5 yr old boys & part-time after-school care provider at my kids' Montessori school.

If the medications are not working, you might want to try St. John's Wort (with your doctor's help). The medications don't work for me, but St. John's Wort sure does! I take 2 capsules in the morning and 2 capsules in the evening. With this, I feel completely normal again. And there are no sluggish side effects that come with the medications.

But be sure not to quit taking what you are taking until your doctor weans you off. I think that is really important.

One other thing that helps me more than ANYTHING when I'm feeling depressed is to spend time with God each day. If I read the Bible and pray at least a little each day, then I can feel the presence of God in my life. Its like a natural high.

Hope this helps.

A.

Hi C.!

Don't be embarrassed! This happens to the best of us and to those of us who thought it never could!

I had/still have the same feelings you do. I can be so happy one second and in no time at all I suddenly get into a funk that I can't snap out of. It's as though I have an outer-body experience. I see myself being pissy and know I'm in this funk but nothing, absolutely nothing, can snap me out of it. I get mad over nothing, easily frustrated, I throw things, and I cry all the time!

I am not on the meds you have been prescribed, my doctor prescribed Welbutrin XL for me. I've been taking it for close to 2 months now. I honestly can't tell if I see a difference though. I know it has helped to some point but I still get pissy, throw things, and cry. :-) I wish I had some magical words of wisdom for you to help you get through this difficult time.

-Char

Hi,

I suffer from the same symptoms as you, maybe just not so severely, and my husband recently pointed me to this article involving temperature changes of your body lessening depression: http://dsc.discovery.com/news/2007/12/18/depression-cold-...

I haven't tried it yet, myself, and if you do, please let me know how/if it helps you.

Best wishes,
D.

C.,

I have a 10 month old and truely know exactly where you are coming from. I was/am there! I felt like no one understood what was going with me and, although they were supportive and there for me, I still felt horrible, out of control, and completely hopeless! Congrats to you for taking a step toward recovery! PPD is a serrious illness as is depression of any kind and needs to be taken seriously. I have been on Paxil since my baby girl was 2 months old, and I still take a rather "large dose" - as my GP would say, but it works for me. I also have Xanax for emergency panic attacks and Clozazapan for anxiety. Although this might be hard to hear, I have only now started to feel "normal" again. A professional counselor helped me the most. It's very nice to talk to a 3rd party who is unbiased and just listens and helps to relieve you of the stress and pain that comes from feeling like a "bad mom!" Let me assure you that you are not....you are a normal person with normal problems who needs help to work through it all - whatever that help might be.

My mom said it best when she said, "It's like being on an airplane and the oxygen masks begin deployed...you have to give yourself oxygen first in order to give your little ones oxygen....." in other words, if mama is not happy, baby is not happy!

Your in my prayers!

Hello C.,

I am taking zoloft and have been for years now. Also, look at this website womentowomen this helps me too.

God Bless you,
J.

C.,

I don't have experience with the medications, but I definitely relate to the ups and downs. I found an incredible support network at my church for people dealing with all of life's hurts, habits, and hang-ups. Check us out if you are interested in attending.

http://www.fbcnorth.org/Content/481.htm

Please don't be embarassed! I have had the same feelings you are having and have had them for sometime there are many of us out in this world. The meds will help I have been on both. If the dosage has been increased thats not a bad thing most doctors start everyone off on very low dosages. It will take some time to get these into you system and for you to see any changes. I take mine at night and for 2 reasons, 1 they make me very tired during the day and I couldn't get anything done at work. So I changed to taking them at night and they still are working and I am not tired anymore. The other is they help me sleep. Please if these do not work continue to try different ones one will work. You can always email me to "vent" to someone that knows some of what you are feeling. Hang in there! There is a light at the end of the tunnel!
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Brooke D

Dear C.:
As far as I know, those medications try to balance some chemicals that a depressed person is running low on. However, mood swings, sad phases and energy drain are normal in every person's life. My mom dealt with depression, too, and I found that the proverbial kick in the butt to do something works better than medication home alone. The key is to not let it get you down. Know the state you are in, but try to mingle and do fun stuff. Isolation is the worst factor, and you don't want to add a dependency on medication. If it helps, look around and find someone who is worse off than you, then be grateful that you are doing OK, that your kids are healthy and that you have a loving husband.

I am not saying that it is all in your head, but you can actively minimize the impact it has on you. I use a similar approach for my skin condition (psoriasis) which has a mental/stress component to it as well. The lesions are real, but I am not letting it get me down. It is as good or bad as you allow it to be, and I think the medication is the smaller part of the solution.

BTW, please talk to your doc before upping a dose.

Regards,
W.

C.,

I just had to say it is not fair of a PP to say Lexapro is awful. I have been on Lexapro for 6 months and it has given me my life back, and I am NOT a totally different person. My point is just that every medication works differently for every person. Zoloft did not work for me at all, but I know many people that loved it. It also took my body a long time to adjust to any medication as I am very sensitive. For me when I started the meds, or any increase in dosage amplified my symptoms in the beginning. You may be experiencing this with the Zoloft. You might stick with it a while longer, but if you don't see some improvement, don't be afraid to ask the doc. if you can try something different. Be careful with the Xanex. I truly hope you can find something that works for you. I found this website helpful when I needed it... www.dailystrength.org Prayer also helped me tremendously. If you need anything feel free to message me anytime.

C.

I have battled depression and axiety issues since high school and I am now 30. I have a chemical imbalance and it is something I have had to deal with for many years! I was embarrased at first and was ashamed to tell my friends.

When I am not on meds I am the same way you describe yourself as being. It is PMS 24/7, happy, sad, mad.... I was mean and hateful and it was mostly directed at my mom and sister. I was tired all the time. I realized that something wasn't right when I was 17 and talked to my doctor. There is family history of depression so I guess I was next in line! (My sister followed in the line too unfortunely)

Over the years, I have take Zoloft, Prozac, Effexor, Wellbutrin, and Celexa.I would take one and it would work for a while and then I felt like it wasn't. It took a long time to get the combination on strength I needed down. Now I take, and have taken for 5 years (skipping one when I was pregnant) Welbutrin SR 150mg twice a day and 10 mg of Celexa once a day. It works, but lately, I feel like it isn't. I am starting to feel sluggish and what to shut myself off from everyone. It may be time to "rework" my combo. But it is hard to do and takes time and a lot of effort. I have been on this combo so long that I am comfortable with it, even though signs are saying my body isn't anymore.

Just keep talking to your doctor until he get it right. It will be hard, but when the combo is right you will know!

While I was embarrassed at first too, I starting talking to my friends about it my junior year in college. I had a really hard time then and had to switch meds up. That caused problems. Grades sliping, shutting off socially, extreme emotions ...

By talking about it then and now I have helped several friends come to terms with their need for medication. They ask questions about how I knew I need it, and when I answer them honestly and it helps them to know that they need to talk to their doctor about their concerns.

I had a boyfriend who told me I didn't need antidepression meds. But believe me I do. My husband says if you need a pill I make you feel "normal" then that is what you have to do (that is why I married him!!!)It is true though.

I too have a two year old and it is tough. I have a lot of days that I don't want to get up and go, but I do it because I know I have to take care of her and that she depends on me. You will figure it out, I promise. Just remember you have two beautiful daughter who need you and who need you to take care of your needs. If you don't take care of yourself and deal with depression, you won't be able to take care of them.

I know this is long and has a lot of personal experience, but I hope it helps. I wish you the best of luck.

Ok first of all, speaking to a psychiatrist, counselor, or anyone that is on the outside of your situation can prove comforting, relieving, and helpful. I can't believe a PP would say it's just a waste of money and time and that your female children could cure everything. LOL... Sometimes, the babies are a source of the stress, no matter how beautiful they can be. I have two gorgeous girls that I love with my entire being, but I have bouts of depression and been struggling with it most of my life. FYI Lexipro is one of the worst anti-depressants you can take. I have known several people that have taken it and it makes you a completely different person, and not in a good way.

I actually remember you now. I lost your e-mail. We were trying to become work out partners. E-mail me again and we'll talk. I know working out is one of the best ways to improve mood and mental/physical/emotional health. Try natural ways first, but I would keep doing what you feel that is working. Coming out and recognizing it is the biggest thing. Keep talking to your psychiatrist (as long as it's helping you) get on medications only if it's what you want and after tons of research, and exercise and eat healthier. I think the above combination is what will really help. (Also, social time with friends for a drink or dinner without kids would be great too)

HTH
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I had doctors prescribe anti-depressants when all I needed was thyroid medication and B12 shots, so I would first suggest that you get your PCP or GYN to check your thyroid (TSH, Free T3 and Free T4), along with your other hormones. Hormonal imbalances - common after childbirth - can contribute to all of your symptoms (e.g., low energy, anger issues, etc.). Also, nutritional deficiencies can make these problems worse - you might try adjusting your diet and taking a high quality multiple vitamin - B vitamins and Iron can be really helpful for energy and mood.