Another Potty Training Question

My son also suddenly, okay, at 3.5 woke up one day and said "does Luke (Skywalker) wear diapers" "no" "pullups?" "no" "underwear" "yes", "then that is what I wear" and he never went back. Completely diapers one day, nothing the next. It can happen. My ds always takes his own time for everything. I tried the potty bribes, the pullups, nothing worked. Well, I guess I could have pushed the issue, but I didn't. Does he like Luke Skywalker?? It will happen, don't worry.

My girlfriend's son did the same thing and wasn't # 2 trained until 4 yrs old. Her pediatrician said not to push that often boys are harder to train than girls because they consider their stool part of them selves and are reluctant to part with it in a potty. He will one day get tired of the mess in his pants. All my grndchildren started wanting to learn to go on the potty early and then suddenly decided they weren't ready and reverted back to diapers for a time. My daughter just let it go and waited a few months before any encouragement to try again was given. My grandson was 3 before he finally became totally trained too so give it some time and let him decide.

Hi M.
It's been a while since I had to potty train, but had the same problem with my son. I don't know if all these things are available still but,... my son really hated the potty, but loved the toilet. There used to be a kinf of stair/potty combo that you could put over the toilet, and as further encouragement, I got these paper floaty bullseyes that you dropped in the toilett and he could "aim" at. Once he started to pee in the toilet, the poo part just fell into place. Hope this helps.

I have seven brothers. I asked my Mom and she said each one is different. If you can get Dad involved that would help. Have him take him into the bathroom when he goes. Let him explain to him about what a man does. Lots of times boys will refuse to sit on the potty but will stand up to pee. Let him learn from his father. Mom said that will work the best. Also she said he will go when he is ready and not a day sooner.

I had a chart for my son and rewards. When he was almost 3 I was ready to pull my hair out, because he still wet his diapers, so I bought underwear. I found out I had to relax. I had been suggesting going potty every few hours and he resisted. But once I wasn't telling him to go all the time, he just said he had to go when he was ready. I guess I was pushing too hard.

I agree that children do it when they're ready. Unfortunately for me, I was in the same boat as you last summer. I needed my daughter to be potty-trained by the end of August. I started the last week of July and went a tad bit insane. Here are some of the things I tried:

Change rewards often! Our treat system: one treat for sitting on the potty & trying and two treats for results. She didn't like sweets, so I offered peanuts, cashews, chips, sweet tarts, etc. She only got this type of food when potty-training. When she lost interest in the reward, usually within a day or two, I brought home something new. That worked for a while.

We also tried the naked technique. My girls LOVE to run around the house naked. One day I noticed that when she didn't wear any clothes, she rarely had accidents. Wonderful news... but only if she could go to school naked!

My ped. told me that my child knew what I wanted and that I should simply stop talking to her about it. So, instead of reminding her to sit on the potty, like most 2-3 yr olds she didn't care to be told when to go, I would simply sit down with her "treats" and pretend to eat them, proclaiming how wonderful they tasted. Most every time I did this, she would immediately run to the potty to try.

Also, my ped. said once they're out of diapers/pull ups, not to go back. We also tried training pants for a while in lieu of regular undies. They are thicker and more absorbent than undies and the child can feel the wetness immediately.

In the end she was potty-trained in time to start school and I regained my sanity. Well, most of it! Good luck.

hi thanks for posting this. I too an having that problem. i have twin girls and i one is showing some interest but like yours it is off and on. the other just has no interest at all... so i am curious as to how to handle this. i am thinking about doing the straight to underwear attempt, but my q to all the experienced moms- how do you handle that when you are not home for seven days straight- go to work, play dates, they go to school etc... do you still make them wear the underwear in the very beginning then too?
plus the first daught who is doing it sometimes, once my mom tried it wheni was not there and she did pee in her panties and refused toput them back on again.. has that happened to someone else? i am afraid to try it because of that reason. i don't want her hating panties, then i will never get her trained!!
so M., i can relate... good luck!

This is something that's up to your son, not you, unfortunately. If he ends up not being able to be in the new class next year, then that's how it will have to be... you can't force a child to potty learn. Both of my kids were late learners... my son was 3 1/2 and my daughter was close to 4 for pee, and 5 (yes, FIVE!) for poop. They do it when they're ready, and not before. Eventually he will get sick of using diapers... it might be next week or next year, but it will happen eventually. (Trust me, I really thought my duaghter would be going on her honeymoon with a package of pullups, but one day she said "I am only going to poop in the toilet now," and lo and behold, there have been no more accidents!)

I noticed that you are expecting a new baby in August... even if by some chance he decides to go only on the toilet within the next month or two, he'll likely regress anyway once the baby is born. It might be easier on all of you if you just stop even talking about pottying until the baby is a few months old. Dealing with two in diapers is a lot easier than dealing with a newborn along with washing tons of laundry because the toddler is having several accidents per day... ask me how I know! ;)

Have you thought about not buying diapers anymore? If there not there he has to atleast graduate to pull ups. Also try not giving him attention for the change. If it is just pee, make him change the pull up himself. Please don't do that if it is #2, what a mess... It all comes in due time. Have you asked the school what happens if August comes and he is not trained, and then in September he is? Maybe his friends actually have to leave his class before he is motivated. Also with a new baby on the way don't be affraid or upset if he reverts back when the baby comes home. Encourage him every day to use the potty, but don't worry to much if he takes his time.

Sounds like you are going about it the right way. I also have a soon to be 3 year old grandson doing exactly what you describe. One minute he is excited about brushing his teeth, the next time it is a battle. As far as going on the potty he thinks it is really the great going pee pee on the potty and making bubbles.
But he will not tell you when he has to go. Good Luck and please pass on any info you may get that helps. I'm sure once they are ready one day they'll decide it's time. Good Luck !! G.

I have a daughter who is exactly the same age. You need to take away all diapers & pull ups. Then, take about 6 pairs of underwear & pants to pre-school with him. When ever he gets wet/dirty they will change his clothes. Do the same thing at home after after work & on weekends. Then, at night put a pull-up on him. I tried all of the other things w/ my daughter, but this is the one thing that finally potty trained her. I work full-time too. Daycare centers usually support your potty training routine. Trust me - after a few weeks he will be potty trained! Good luck!

This is just a suggestion. My mother in law told me that when she was potty training her boys, she put food coloring in the water. She said they got a kick out of the water changing color. Other than that, I would say wait it out. I have girls, so I do not know from experience. Good luck.

Hi M.,
I know this is a frustrating time for you. It makes it even harder because you have a deadline involved. Kids have a way of digging their heels in when they know we really want them to do something! Two things we absolutely cannot control is what they eat and when/where they go potty. I think that if you can let him take the lead on this it might change the outcome. My son was about 3 1/2 when he figured it all out. We didn't use any rewards as we thought that might give him power that we didn't want him to have. Would the teacher at your son's school allow him to move up a little bit later?

We used It's my potty video and book and I left the potty sitting around. On a day that we didn't have anywhere to go I let my son run around the house naked. I kept reminding him that he wasn't wearing a diaper and if he needed to go pee or poo his potty was right there. After him using the potty all that day the next day we put him in underwear, we thought putting him back in a diaper would send a mixed signal and brought the potty with us. We packed extra clothes for accidents. He had to understand his signals that's not something I can teach him!

He wears a pull up at nap and night time.

I think there are some books on potty training in a day if you have to have him trained by August.

I wish you all the luck in the world!
Take care,
N. :)