3 Month Not Wanting to Be with Daddy

Babies usually prefer mommies. It doesn't have anything to do with a personality preference. It can't be taken personally. Moms are usually the comforters. Babies form a strong bond with the mother when they are inside out tummies. They can pick out our heartbeat, scent etc. Kids usually go back and forth. You are with him the majority of the time, right?

Hi B.. We've had this problem in our family with our daughter. Whenever she gets sick, teeth, or hurt, she wants nothing to do with her dad and only wants me. The best solution I've found is to let them have as much time together WITHOUT ME as possible. They can work it out, but you can't be there. Good luck! I know it can hurt Dad's feelings when this is going on.

I don't think there are any shortcuts in the situation, since familiarity counts for a LOT with babies. Recognize it's a phase, and say encouraging things to your husband to soothe any stress.
Consider letting your husband be the one to bathe Baby or put lotion on or other fun things that he can enjoy. My babies have always liked riding in a sling or front pack with their Dad, because he would walk around a lot and show them things--I would just stand still to fold laundry and it was more interesting to walk around the yard with Dad.
It could be nice to remind your husband that him helping you is helping Baby, and Baby will grow up to appreciate having a dad who looks out for his whole family. I think it's important to diffuse any jealousy or tension about this phase, since it is just a phase and you don't want any lasting resentment or hurt feelings over it. Best wishes!

Daddy simply can NOT take this personally. This isn't a personal thing at all. If fact, this sort of thing will happen off and on through out your lives; sometimes he'll prefer you and sometimes he'll prefer daddy AND there will be certain things he'll want to share with one more than the other. This is NORMAL.

You said this started when he began teething. Well, mommies are the comforters...especially if you're breastfeeding--and no you shouldn't stop due to this.

I promise, promise, promise this will pass.

As has been said before, you can start picking out responsibilities that belong to daddy...as a general rule this is good anyway.

Honestly though, I think this simply has to do with a situation, not an attitude or a like/dislike issue.

Watch for how you respond when he starts crying.
~~Are you compelled to come rescue him?
~~When daddy's holding him, do you allow time for daddy to sooth him in his way or do you put a time limit on how long you'll allow it to go?
~~Is baby actually reaching for you or are you offering yourself to him and he comes?
~~How are you holding him versus how your husband holds him? Sometimes it's the manner in which we're holding our babies that makes the difference. If they're in pain sometimes the WAY we hold them can HURT...so chech that out. Remember, too, the size of your arms compared to the size of daddy's come be the deciding factor, too. You may prefer to hold him on your left side while daddy's holding him on the right side; in general, babies prefer the left side of whoever's holding them because of they can hear the heart beat.
~~How do you talk to baby versus how daddy does? Are you softer and higher?
~~Do you stand, bounce, rock, etc...while holding your son? Does daddy?
This isn't going to last long, I'd encourage daddy to be active in the supporting role rather than getting hurt by this. I'd also encourage YOU not to get wound up in this idea that your 3 month old baby who is not capable of being mean is trying to be hurtful to daddy. Sooth hubby with specific language that aserts he's an amazing daddy rather than that he's missing out.

Be encouraged, this WILL pass. :o) :o) :o)

My son did that to his daddy for awhile too. He was solely breastfed and I stay at home with him, so until he was about a year old, he wanted not much to do with his daddy. I kept assuring my hubby that it was just a stage and sure enough, at about a year (and when I stopped breastfeeding, so daddy HAD to step in more), Mom suddenly became second-rate...daddy is more fun to play with!!! He still has his mommy-moments, usually when he's sick or hurt, that it's mommy or no one, but those have become less and less as he also enjoys staying with his 2 sets of grandparents who live in town for longer periods of time and daddy becomes cooler each day...and with the fact that we are due in Aug with #2 and so he will be forced to be away from mommy for a few days anyway AND THEN to share mommy (gasp!)!

While he was in the middle of the stage, we gave daddy jobs that ONLY daddy did each day (my hubby chose shower/baths and he would actually put the baby in bed after eating the final time at night...so those were daddy-only moments that I sat on the couch and didn't overly-particiate in- except to help wash hair and to take the baby from daddy after the shower so daddy could get out easier- and resisted stepping in if the baby cried too much!) We even tried an occasional bottle, but my son refused ANY bottles, so that didn't work very well...we know better this time around so that will change a bit with #2 so we keep daddy a little more involved with #2 son, but I know each kid is his own little person, so he will decide who he wants to be with at his own time!

Anyway, tell your hubby to keep his head up and to keep it in perspective- hard I know- but his son will turn around again and to choose a few things that he wants as "daddy-moments"! You guys are doing fine!

Your baby has a wonderful daddy (and undoubtedly knows it), but probably right now he just wants to be mama's boy! Some children do that. When my oldest granddaughter was a baby, she wanted absolutely nobody but mama for a long while. And even after daddy was acceptable, she didn't want anything to do with (gasp!) Gran for even longer. Those of us who aren't Mommy just have to maintain our senses of humor and go along with it. Like any kind of people interaction, it isn't something that can be forced. One day - maybe soon - your son will take Daddy into his "inner circle."

i like mary's comment. my 8 month old is doing this right now. she's especially scared if daddy wears a hat. but when i nurse her in the evenings while watching tv with my husband, she always turns to him to be burped. that's her connection time with him. otherwise she's not too happy to be left with him, even if i'm in the next room. she barely tolerates my mom, but is fine with one particular neighbor. so at least there's someone i can ask to babysit at times, even if it's not who i would normally choose first. it helps for dad to set up a routine with the baby, like bathtime, playing together while you make dinner, going outside to get the mail. it eventually goes away.