Hi. I have a 2 year old son Logan. He has had some problems in his 2 years. Acid reflux, at first we didn't know what it was, and had to have a barium xray. That traumitized him. Throwing up since birth, caused by the acid reflux. Well now mommy has a problem. I won't shut his door because of a fire hazzard. My sister says that its ok, that she does it with her two youngest... and I just can't do it. But he won't stay in his bed. Last night I put him to bed at his normal bed time, and I went in my room, which is right next to his, and I laid down to watch tv with my fiance. I got up to check on him and he wasn't in his bed, he was at my computer playing with my digital camera. I told him that was naughty and that he needed to stay in his bed and go to sleep. I went back to bed. I ended up falling asleep and about 30 min later I got up to check on him again and couldn't find him. He was hiding between my couch and my chair. He scared me half to death. He has gotten up out of bed before at nap time, when he was home with his dad, and his dad was woken up by the door bell. My son opened the front door, the bottom was locked but not the dead bolt. I am wondering what to do about this? Is it ok to put a baby gate across his door high enough that he can't climb over it, but not so high that he can't climb under it? Please any advice is greatly appreciated:) THANK YOU for the responces so far... but I forgot to mention.. logan has been in a big boy bed for a year and some months now. Him getting out of his and going elsewhere besides my room is totally new. He used to go to my room and try and climb in bed with daddy and I. Thank you all for your responces again... Great ideas. thank you.
Thank you all so much for your words of advice. I am really uneasy about leaving his door closed at night. I did however stay with him and get him comfy last night before I left his room, and then daddy and I switched...and he did go to sleep and another part, he went to bed with no cup... which we have been working on as well. He drank his cup of milk on the couch with me, "quiet time" and we put him to bed. It was a nice evening. Thank you all.
Hey A.
I had some friends with a little guy who was very smart and could get into (or out of) anything. They bought 2 of the baby gates that mount to the wall and can be undone really easily by an adult and placed them in the door to his bedroom...one on top of the other. This way he could not climb over or under them, but they could quickly and easily undo them if they needed to. Just a thought!
D.
Hello,
Well this worked for me so maybe it'll work for you. I put a baby gate in the bedroom doorway. This way when my son got up in the middle of the night, he couldn't leave the room. If he didn't want to go back to bed he would sometimes cry because he couldn't get out. I just told him to go back to bed and I let him cry awhile. Sometimes he would fall asleep on the floor by the gate but, after a couple weeks, she stayed in bed no problem and the gate came down. Good Luck!
Leaving a door open is more of a fire hazard. It is safer to CLOSE bedroom doors at night. (If a fire starts in the kitchen or living room, smoke immediately begins to fill the home. And smoke inhalation is the number one killer in fires. When bedroom doors are closed, less smoke is able to get into the bedrooms. Adults have more time to wake up to a smoke detector and get the children out of the house if the children's bedrooms aren't filled with smoke.
Are you talking about LOCKING the door? I'm assuming so. When you weigh the likelihood of a fire (pretty slim unless you are incredibly irresponsible and leave burning candles, etc.) versus the likelihood that an unsupervised two year old will get into something dangerous or destructive - which is more dangerous?
All you need is a regular bathroom door knob with the little push in lock. Then hang the little metal rods that serve as "keys" right next to the door. It takes an extra five seconds to pop the lock on the door.
Finally, when I lived in Olympia a little boy (three or four years old) with a reputation for getting out of his bedroom AND his house late at night got out one night, made it to the road and was killed by a hit and run driver. I think something like this is the greater danger than the possibility of a fire.
Hi A. ~ It is much less of a fire hazzard to have his bedroom door shut at night. Being a daughter of a fire fighter it was drilled in to our heads to ALWAYS sleep with the door shut! You stay much safer enclosed in your room should a fire start in another part of the house. Unless you are burning candles in your room it is the least likely place for a fire to break out.
As for a baby gate across your sons bedroom door, do it! It won't last forever but it may very well help him to learn that bed time is bed time and he's not leaving his room. This worked well for our daughter.
Good luck!
I think you can try the baby gate, but it's only a band-aid. He'll figure out how to get over it before long if he really wants out. Also, he might just end up playing in his room and still not going to bed. I know when we put our daughter in a bed vs crib, it took a few weeks (if I remember right) to get her to stay in bed! It's a frustrating couple of weeks that's for sure, especially when you are tired and want to get to bed! I would make sure all doors and windows are locked so that he can't open any doors and I would stay up until he's asleep.
Just an idea, but you could try the reward system. I know all kids are different and what works for one, might not for another, but you could do it just about any way that works for you...like for 1 week he can accumulate a star for every night he stays in bed and then gets a prize or treat of some sort depending on how many he gets for the week. Or keep it simple and do a daily thing...if he stays in bed, the next morning he gets something, something he REALLY likes and maybe doesn't get that often like a favorite cereal or a show on tv or whatever it is you want to use! You can come up with anything! You can also take something away if he does get out of bed...a favorite toy going into a time out or something like that.
Another idea (and maybe you already do) but stick to a routine at bedtime. Reading stories, talking about the day-whatever! If you are just putting him into bed and saying goodnight, I can see where he's going to be getting up as soon as the coast is clear! Not that reading stories is going to solve the problem, but I do think it'll help! I just think one of the keys is getting them to be all warm and cozy in their bed before you leave, not laying with them until they fall asleep, just getting them comfy! If he likes books, let him look at books while he is in bed before he falls asleep.
Good luck!
A.,
Yes, I think it is o.k. to put up the baby gate, however that wont work for long...soon enough he will learn how to climb over it! I think you are going to have to stay awake for a couple of nights and put him back in bed everytime he gets out. Dont worry this too shall pass, all our kids have gone thru this stage! But for heavens sake LOCK any and all locks on all the doors leading to the outside...that would scare the beejeezes out of me too!!
K.
A....I was told by a fireman that it's actually safer to have the door closed. The odds of a fire starting anywhere else in the house are greater than it starting in your child's room. Your child's door will keep the smoke (from anywhere else in the house) from coming into his room. We shut our kids doors at night and have taught them that if the smoke detector goes off they should put some clothes at the door crack and lie down on the floor until a grown up comes to get them (which may be through their window).
Also...I would think the odds of you son getting hurt or in trouble by getting into stuff during the night would be higher than the odds of a fire.
Just my two cents....
L. H
PS I'm a sahm to 9 and 5 year old girls.
Nightime-Fire-safety = Closed bedroom doors:)
I know I am not the first to mention this.
And I know it may be an uncomfortable idea at first, but it is statistically safer for everyone in your home to sleep with the doors shut. It is how my husband and I put our 20 month old to sleep, our family is comfortable with it but I understand that this may not be the best for everyone. I think that the previous responses to this topic have all been great and filled with great advice. The only things I could possibly add is food for thought...
Be sure that any barriers you place in front of doors can be quickly and easily removed by you, your family members, and especially any emergency responders (who may be unfamiliar with how your device works).
If you choose to leave the door open make sure that you have barriers in place that keep little ones out of dangerous areas- perhaps leaving only a route to mom and dad's room available. Kids can sometimes learn to silently climb baby-gates (and man are they fast!), you can string bells or noise makers to them which may wake you up at night if you are a sound sleeper.
Make sure to read up on fire safety tips for around the house, make a firm habit of following those rules throughout your day and teach children about them too (both of which will help you sleep better at night).
Review fire escape/emergency plans and talk about them with other family members- doing so can help everyone minimize panic in an actual emergency.
Keeping an evening routine is great for kids' relaxation, suprises are, well, unexpected- and exciting. Getting them involved in the process now will help them to develop the skills to relax themselves as older children and even as adults... One of the things we do is light candles when we settle down for our snack and a little tv time (I keep them high out of reach and store the lighter in a high, locked drawer in another room---kind of ironic for this topic:), then we get to blow them out before we head upstairs. This is only an example to say that anything can become a routine- you could simply have him turn out the lights in the house and say goodnight- see you tomorrow to everyone and his toys. Please be safety conscientious if you light candles around your little guy:)
I could probably go on and on, but basically what I'm trying to get at is, you can't be there every second of the day- even as a SAHM. You can't guarantee that you will be there the first time your kid learns to do something new and possibly dangerous- But taking precautions and safeguarding your home are GOLDEN. Knowing that your child can't escape the house, consume bleach or other dangerous substances, or start a fire if he happens to figure his way silently out of his room at 2AM, could be just enough to help you fall asleep at night, that is if youre not up worried about wedding plans:)
Some quick links for anyone interested in fire safety info:
http://www.homesafetycouncil.org/safety_guide/sg_fire_w00...
http://www.usfa.dhs.gov/citizens/all_citizens/home_fire_p...
I agree with the baby gate. It is the best easiest and least traumatic for your son. When he wakes and you hear him at tje baby gate put him back in bed with out saying any thing. If he is just playing quietly don't bother him.
My son was a night owl and when he was old I finally told him, he had to be in bed and he could do anything he wanted as long as he was flat on his back. That left reading and imaging things. Later on when he was an adult he told me he made a chapter book similar to Star Wars.
So this could be a good thing for your son. W.
We used the step gate with our oldest son and it worked great. I didn't want to shut his door because we couldn't hear him from downstairs if we did that. We just put the gate on my youngest's door, he's 21 months and it's working great. It gives you peace in knowing he's safe, but keeps him contained like the crib did. Good luck.
My boys were both in big boy beds at around 15 months (toddler beds at least). I used a baby gate until they were older, then started closing the door. For a 2 year old a baby gate should work good, as long as he is not climbing on it.
i would say that a gate is ok. but i also watched a nanny 911 show and it said that when they get out of bed pick them up and put them right back. this method will take time alot of time but it will be worth it.
My husband and I have 2 cats and when our son was born, we were really scared that the cats would go into his room and lay on him. But we, also, didn't want to close the door at that time. We ended up putting a screen door on the room along with the regular door. But, if you don't want to have a solid door, maybe try the screen door in place of it. We got a really cheap door with just a wooden frame and screened top and bottom. You would probably need to get a screen protector on the bottom of it because our little guy easily was able to detach the screen at age 1. Anyway - hope this helps. You could also try a Dutch door (opens on top, but not on bottom.
Did you ever consider that 2 yrs old is too young to be in anything but a crib??? I'm 68 and feel that mothers today RUSH into a 'big bed' too soon.
We have a gate that we put up so that our boys can't get into anything at night. It works for keeping our two-year-old in his room until he falls asleep too, as a last resort.
We put it at the top of the stairs at night and that keeps both our boys upstairs with us and out of danger.
Hi A.,
I have to agree with the other ladies that shutting his door is safer then waking up and not knowing where he is. I can only imagine your panic!
With my first son we did the baby gate and it worked great until he figured out how to climb it. With my second son he was such a monkey from the time he was little, that we had no choice but to shut the door (he scaled everything since he was 12m). When he figured out how to open the door at 18m we put a door knob cover on the inside of his door. We could hear when he got up that way and we would get up and put him back in bed. We used the Super Nanny approach and told him the first time it was bedtime. The second time, we told him again but the third time on we didn't do anything but put him back in his bed with a kiss. It really did work.
Good luck :)
I have a 2 year old who is in a bed and I sit in my room where I can see his door until he goes to sleep. He won't come out of his room if I am sitting there, and I just keep telling him to go back to bed. Eventually he goes and lays down and falls asleep. A baby gate could also help keep him in his room, or one of those kid "spy alarms" could alert you when he crosses that threshold. You could also try closing his door until he goes to sleep and then open it before you go to sleep. Good luck.
