19 Month Old Waking in the Night....

Updated on November 07, 2006
M.R. asks from Shelburne Falls, MA
9 answers

We are having a very recurrent problem. My 19-month-old son wakes up in the middle of the night, every night, and just screams until we come and get him. He's been doing this for months, and we're at a loss as how to handle this. He goes to sleep just fine--no temper tantrums or anything. It happens so often that most of the time we don't even realize that we've gotten him and brought him into our bed--it's just become automatic. Complicating the situation is the fact that our 3 year old son shares a room with him...so we're afraid that if we just let him cry it out (which I hate to do anyway) will wake up our other son and cause a whole new slew of problems. Does anyone have any advice on how to handle this? We're at our wits end!

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W.D.

answers from Boston on

do you have anight light?? My son just recently did the same thing and it was because he'd wake up in the middle of the night in total darkness.. worked like a charm..

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J.G.

answers from Springfield on

My 13 month old is the same way. We wake up to him in our bed every morning and neither of us ever remember going to get him. We spoke to our pediatrician about it and she said that it's best to go in and either pat him on the back or talk to him, but never to pick him up. Easier said than done! I know that's probably difficult, with having another child in the room, but I suppose it's worth a shot!

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S.F.

answers from Buffalo on

Do you have someplace (another room) you could move your older son for the time it takes to teach his little brother to sleep through the night? I know that when my mom decided to have my little sister cry it out, I got to have an "adventure" and sleep somewhere else (I don't even know where - on the couch in the den, I guess), and I was the same age as your older son.

What we've done with CIO is just waited increasing amounts of time before going in - first 10 minutes, then 15, then 20. And when we did go in, we just calmed her without picking her up.

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A.B.

answers from Boston on

Gosh, if I wasnt responding to this I would have thought that I wrote it. I am exactly where you are except my oldest is 4 and the baby is 20 months.You should do what I didnt do and keep putting then back to bed cuz if not then you will have then both sleeping with you. which is exatly where I am. the baby was waking my other son and then they both ended up in my bed and now its been like that forever it seams, now were at the point where we cant go to bed by ourselves its the 4 of us. perfect birth control. so nip this now unless you want to be like us. good luck

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M.K.

answers from Boston on

My son has never been a great sleeper... He is two and it feels like I haven't slept since he was born. He used to get up two or three times a night (when he was around 18 months) and none of the suggestions worked - because he was an only child I actually TRIED the 'let him cry himself to sleep....' an hour and a half later, we were all up for an hour and a half, and I ended up in his room to rock him. I DO NOT recommend letting him cry himslef to sleep.

One thing that I did start doing is reducing his sugar and juice intake to "0" starting at 4 or 5 pm. I just asked his auntie (daycare) not to give him any juice after 4, trekked to Whole Foods to find some cereal and snacks that were low in sugar, picked up some "Calms Forte 4 Kids" by Hyland's Homeopathic, started giving him nighttime baths with a dollap of Bath & Body Works "Lavender Vanilla Aromatherapy" body wash and he now wakes up once a night and chats himself back to sleep.

It seems like a lot to go thru for a good night sleep, but I felt like I would go insane and go to any measure to get my kid (and myself) to sleep!!

FYI: I only had to use the Calms Forte for three nights in a row and his body must have adjusted itself to sleep.

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D.

answers from New York on

Have you tried using a pack-n-play. When he wakes at night, instead of putting him in bed with you, put him in the pack-n-play next to your bed. Then once he gets use to that move it to the hallway outside your room. And slowly into his own room. Do it in stages.

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C.A.

answers from Boston on

My 15 month old son was waking during the night for his first 10 months. He also shares a room with his two brothers and had become dependant on sleeping in my bed. I finally got to the point where I was so miserable during the day that I was yelling at my other two children all the time. I finally decided I had to let him cry it out (I hated to do it too). But he shared a room, so I ended up putting him in his port-a-crib in my down stairs laundry room. I'ts the only room on my first floor with a door. We did that for about two and a half months. I would keep the monitor on but turned almost all the way down. He would wake up and cry but it wouldn't wake me up right away. It was hard at first, but once he learned how to fall asleep on his own I moved him back up to his crib. He's been sleeping through the night ever since.

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C.B.

answers from New London on

Have told his peditrician he could be having night terrors

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A.H.

answers from Boston on

M.,
I didn't have the same problem but, I used this method when I moved my son out of our room into his own room and crib roomTry going into his room and comforting him when he is still in his crib. Lean over the side rail and rub his back or do whatever it is you do to comfort him. After he gets used to that just go in his room when he cries and stand by the crib, leaning over the rail and talk to him reassuringly with comforting soothing sounds; maybe even sing him a song. Once that starts working, if he waking in the night just put a chair by his crib and sit where he can't see you but he can hear you and do the same as before.
I cannot promise you that this will work but I did it with my son when he was a less than a year old and I moved him from his bassinette into his own room in his crib. I think that it's a security thing for babies, they want to know that you are close and most importantly that you will always be there when he needs you especially in the night.
You may also consider a night light if you don't have one already. If you don't sing or are afraid it may wake you other son try a music box in his crib that you can wind up and put in his crib when he wakes while you stand over him rubbing his back.
GOOD LUCK AND GOD BLESS
A.

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