Will I Ever Leave the House Again? :)

Updated on June 10, 2011
R.D. asks from Haysville, KS
10 answers

So I'm on day 3 of potty draining my 26 month old DD. First day she only drank one cup of water all day, so not much opportunity to practice. So really I guess it's only been two days. Today has been pretty good; all morning she kept her panties dry and would either run to the bathroom or look at me. Then right before lunch I thought she had to go because she was feeling her underwear. I asked, and she said no. I didn't push it...she starts eating and pees all over the chair! Then later this afternoon she was putting together a puzzle and had another accident. Since then, she's been fine and making it. I'm wondering if she just didn't want to take the time to go to the bathroom :)
But...I just wonder how in the world we will ever leave the house? In case you can't tell, this is my first potty training experience :)
When I can tell she needs to go, or when she tells me she needs to go we walk pretty calmly to the bathroom. Sometimes she takes a few minutes to get there. She apparently can hold it long enough for that. I just wonder though...in the car, in the store...are we going to make it in time? This weekend should I practice having her "hold it"?
I'm just feeling frustrated because I have a TON of stuff I wanted to do this summer and a ton of stuff I NEED to do this summer. I start back to school (am a teacher) August 1st and I just feel like summer is almost over! I know that sounds crazy. I will be a second year teacher, but moved grade levels so I'm starting over again. I have a ton of stuff to create, print, copy, laminate, cut, organize...I still need to go to the school and finish painting and unpacking my new room. I signed up for some summer technology trainings. I also signed up for the Y...went last week and met with the trainer (you get four free sessions or whatever) The next day we started potty training so I have literally just been sitting in my house doing NOTHING for three days...driving me CRAZY!!! The plan was to start going to the Y 4 days a week starting on Monday....and putting DD into the Kid Zone for an hour. Then in July she starts gymnastics.
I guess I just don't know what I need to do next. I am planning on buying a travel potty for the car. So when she says something or says "uh oh" do I just pull off to the side of the interstate and let her go? When we are shopping for groceries and she needs to go, what do I do? Take the cart and run through the store :) ?
I just feel clueless. I know we will figure it out, but until then....ugh!!
Also...what if (not what if, more of what do we do WHEN) she does have an accident in a public place? Do I go try and find paper towels or something to wipe up the floor?
Please don't suggest pull-ups, or anything like that. We tried that and she just felt like she was in a diaper so felt no need to announce she needed to go to the bathroom or that she was wet afterwards.
One more thing....she has had 3 BM's since we started this. All 3 she came to me after the fact (of course all 3 were the only times I wasn't right by her side). I took her and sat her on the potty, took off underwear and made sure she saw the BM in the potty. I explained that's where her poop goes (sorry, gross I know) and told her that is where she needs to go when she has to poop. Will we just need more practice with this one?
My hubby told me to go to the gym tomorrow and spend some "me" time (which I desperately need, I won't lie) away from the house. I am planning on it, but I just don't know if he will run things the same way. I'm always the ones to do every single thing. I just know that he has no idea how attentive you have to be (btw...this has taken me ALL day to write as I add on and finish up when DD is right by me, etc so I am making sure I'm keeping a close eye on her :) ) and I really dont want her to regress. I'm only planning on being gone a few hours...but I still worry :)
I just feel like we will never get through this and be able to go anywhere again....ugh :)
I do realize that she will have accidents and that is to be expected...just trying to figure out how we go about that.
BTW...she just said she had to go, then laughed hysterically and took her sweet time, while saying hold it haha...just wondering how long she can be expected to hold it.
Any suggestions, advice...ANYTHING :) that will be useful? Thanks a million!

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So What Happened?

Ahh...feeling better already :)
I am pretty sure she is totally ready to be potty trained. She has shown a lot of interest for the last few months, but I didn't pursue it (looking back, wish I would have) because I didn't want to get into it while I was still trying to teach. She actually is doing a great job letting me know she has to go...just having trouble with the poop and those two accidents. I'm in no way expecting her to "get it" in three days, but wanted that as a base. I am the type of person that has to be on the go...these last three days have driven me INSANE and my daughter is bored silly as well :)
I think tomorrow we will venture over to a friends house who will also be watching my DD a few times this summer and "test" it out. Planning on going to the Y on Monday...it's only a ten minute drive, and she will only be in there less than an hour. She really does not go very often...so I think that has slowed down the process a bit because we haven't had as much chance to practice.
I needed some words of encouragement, and I have already found plenty; thank you so much!!
As to my classroom....I'll try to make it a short story haha! It was already painted a pale blue, which I like...but a teacher a long time ago painted all sorts of weird stuff directly onto the walls and bulletin boards. I'm painting my huge bulletin board (takes up one whole wall) black because it is the only way to cover the very weird and somewhat disturbing images haha! I already painted over tony the tiger (another bb...medium sized) in black, and it will need another coat. I have to paint almost everything so I don't see all of that :)
But a simple answer hehe...the room is light blue...the bb's are black or yellow (ones with nothing on them) and then one bb is a darker shade of blue (because I was tired of black :) ) It is a space/airplane theme (aerospace and engineering magnet) so I think it will work, but have a TON to do :)

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S.H.

answers from Killeen on

I know that you no pull ups and I completely get why but you might want to consider putting pull ups on her just for the times you are out and constantly reminding her/ and or taking her to the restroom while you are out. Thats what I did with my daughter and it worked well. You shouldnt have to use the pull ups for long before she gets the hang of it. It sounds frustrating I know but at least you will be out of the house. However you decide to handle it just remember this stage will be over before you know it :)

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S.B.

answers from Dallas on

Hang in there mama. She'll get it. I tried the three day method with my daughter....twice. It didn't work for us. My SIL had great success with her first and after a second try, it went well for her second daughter. Every kid learns potty training at their own pace. So don't panic if she isn't potty trained in three days. My daughter is totally potty trained when we leave the house and at night, but until this week, she was still having numerous accidents at home. We have been at this a little while. No matter what success you have or don't have, she won't be going to prom in diapers, I promise.

As far as leaving the house...in the beginning we used pull ups (my daughter HATES the plastic pants with a passion!!), but that was short lived. Then I started carrying a change of pants, panties and a tea towel in my purse. And a back up change of clothes in the car. We have only had one accident and most of it was on her. For the rest, I used my old tea towel to clean the floor and then tossed it. It was no big deal, really. Yes, when she says she has to pee, you'll find yourself running to the restroom with a full cart. (Actually today I found myself yelling "Don't let the pee pee out. Don't let it out!). Anyone with a kid will understand and probably give you the "I've been there" smile. You can use a potty chair, but that backfired on me. My daughter found it hysterical to yell she had to go potty and watch me rush to the back of the car to help her. It took me a little while to catch on. So now it only comes with us if we are going somewhere with no potties (like tball practice or camping). I found the three day method exhausting and difficult and I still did it twice. It may take her a while to get it. Just stay calm and consistent. If you find yourself completely overwhelmed or agitated, take a break from the training and come back to it later. I had to do this with my son and it was the BEST advice I was given. Good Luck!!

1 mom found this helpful
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C.W.

answers from Washington DC on

I put a little potty in the back of the car, carried an extra set of clothes around, and bundled them up in thick underwear with plastic panties covering them. If you can, have them go before you leave the house, and every time you see a public bathroom, stop in and check it out with her. If we were going some place where an accident just can't occur, I would put them in a pull up for that occasion (trust me, you don't want to be the mom of the kid that pees in the slide at Chik filet --yep that happened to me :) )

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S.R.

answers from Kansas City on

When we were in the first months I would put rubber pants over his underwear and put his jeans or shorts on for trips in the car. We would always go right before we got in the car and again when we got to the store.

I also never gave him a choice about going. It's "L- it's time to go to the bathroom now" I never asked if he wanted to because of course he would rather play than stop and go potty. At almost 3.5 I still don't give him a choice- when I say lets go I mean it. Otherwise he will wait until the last minute and barely make it.

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K.E.

answers from Jacksonville on

She'll get there....It does take time....I kept thinking my daughter would be in diapers until college! She was actually much easier than I thought she was now that I hear friends' horror stories of years of on and off training. :)

It is a challenge for us to be patient and to wrap our heads around the fact that such a simple task isn't that simple for them.

If you are set on no pull ups, make sure to bring along extra changes of clothes, be ready to wash the car seat often and be prepared for accidents.

I still loathe public restrooms with my daughter and she's been potty trained for a year. It's just hard for me to get over the ick factor and I HATE it. :)

With BMs, my daughter took longer than with peeing. We finally realized it was a privacy thing for her. So we told her to sit on the toilet, gave her a book and closed the door and left. She went and has been going like that ever since, just without the book now! :) She is fine with us being there when she pees, but she wants privacy for BMs.

Right now I am working on wiping better and being a bit more independent when she goes. Like remembering to wipe, flush and wash hands without us having to be right there. The wiping leaves a bit to be desired, but she is getting there.

Again, this takes time and you are not the only one who has stressed over this. I have and will again with the next one. :) It's a crazy journey and one of the milestones that feels like it takes forever because it really doesn't just happen like most of the other milestones do!

Go about your daily routine and encourage pottying throughout the day, but by all means, do not lock yourself in the house the rest of the summer!

Good luck!

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S.S.

answers from Chicago on

You might as well live your life, she will have accidents whether you stick to her like velcro all day or move on. Put a plastic sheet under her in the carseat or car, bring the extra cleaning supplies, wipes, towel, change of clothes and get your life going And do not worry about hubby. He is different. Of course he is, he's a man. So he might not do exactly what you want but leave him to being trained also. He is not going to like a stinky cleanup either after the first or second time. I guarantee you it will all work out and you will not be stuck at home with her til she's thirty. You have kindgergarten graduations and proms to look forward to and someone will make fun of her if she hasn't reached the potty world yet. Sadly, that' s sometimes what it takes. In the meantime, relax and get that one off of your chest. Now, what color are you painting your class room?

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L.F.

answers from Chicago on

She not be quite ready for potty training. If you have a busy summer planned, and she is otherwise happy in diapers, you might want to stop the potty training for a while and revisit again when she is showing more signs of readiness.

A lot of children regress, even after they have been successful at potty training for a few months. The younger the child, the higher her chances will be that she will regress. You might save yourself the aggravation of cleaning up accidents, always searching for bathrooms right when you're in the middle of doing something important, waking up in the middle of the night when she claims that she NEEDS TO GO, and cleaning out the potty. You'll still be paying for diapers, but it might be money well spent. Good luck to you!

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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

My 3 year old is newly potty trained, but we still go out and about as usual. I carry a ziploc bag in my purse with underwear and extra pants for her. She doesn't usually have accidents, but if she does we just go to the nearest bathroom to change. It's not as traumatic as it seems, just part of life, and she'll get the hang of it soon!

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L.L.

answers from Topeka on

I would have to say don't tell her to hold it in this may develop into a habit & UTIs in the future,for her poops if held in can cause issues in the future too.My son held his in he only poo's at home & it is no fun I have a story if you want to hear it.Let her do her own pace undies are fine at home & out.With both my kids I did fine taking them out in their undies & confindent that mommy will get to the bathroom in time for them we had no accidents in public.You will get to go out again,aggresion happens for so many reasons & it may happen to your daughter for some reason that you will never know don't fret easy to do I know but continue as normal.If your not wanting to go the pull ups route in publis stay home for a while longer & practice some kids get the hang of it sooner than others but there is also the night time potty training.I'm on my 3rd she is 27 months she will wear undies but refuses to sit on the potty chair don't know why she was starting to train herself when she was 18 months she peed & pooed on the potty chair now I can't make her sit down long enough to pee.So we go through undies & pull ups.She is also very stubborn

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H.D.

answers from Dallas on

I hate potty training, no, take that back, I LOATHE potty training. One tip I have for you that seemed to help me, especially since I had a schedule that kept us on the go... Put your child in underwear but put a pull-up over it. As soon as you enter a store go straight to the bathroom so she is aware there is one everywhere. If by chance you are out and about and she has an accident, at least it's contained still. Also, ALWAYS keep extra clothes with you. I made that mistake once and ended up having to go buy new clothes for my kid so I could finish my errands that were on the total opposite side of town.

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