Weaning - Covina,CA

This is a rough one, and I wish you luck. Start offering her things other than the boob when she gets upset, or when she gets hungry. Offer her some of a favorite food, offer her a special toy or blankie when she wants to relax, so she can start associating these things in the same way she thinks of the boob as comfort. Also, I started preparing my kids for weaning by warning them a few weeks in advance that the "yummies" were almost empty, only a little bit left! Just a gradual reminder that it would eventually happen, that the milk was not there forever, helped.

It called extended breastfeeding. You can research it online.

I breastfed both my kids, and let them Self-Wean.
My daughter did so at about 2.5 years old. My son at about 1 year old.

You said you nurse "exclusively." Do you mean that your girl does not get any whole milk? Just breastmilk?
My both my kids, after 1 year old, drank organic whole milk as well. Even though I still had lots of breastmilk. It was a natural transition.

Now, if you want to wean your daughter... then perhaps transition her to whole milk, or what you think is appropriate per your Pediatrician.

For me, I only nursed on demand when my kids were younger... but after a time, I only nursed IF they asked. Not as a matter of routine. In time, the child naturally will "ask" less and less. And your breastmilk output will adjust. ie: supply and demand.

I chose to self-wean my kids. BUT... with my daughter since she was more attached... I talked with her about it. "One day you will not need to drink from Mommy.... you are a big girl.... etc." AND, I only nursed her IF she asked... AND only let her latch on for a short time... not using me as a pacifier and just hanging on my breasts for eternity.
Also, when she got older at about 1.5 years old, I taught her
"MANNERS" about it... ie: ask politely, do NOT just tug my shirt up and grab me... do NOT do that in public, ONLY at home is where you can nurse etc. Otherwise, a child just tends to "grab" and get bossy about it. So, I just in a comforting way, TAUGHT my daughter about how to be polite about it. AND... if she asked to nurse, I would sometimes say something like "Mommy is busy right now... in a minute, okay?" And then I would NOT sit down... but make like I am "busy" (which I was) and just stayed standing and doing stuff. THEN, if she still wanted/needed to nurse, then fine, I sat down and she would. But by that age, she did NOT stay attached to my breasts for very long. Just a couple of minutes... so this was HER way of "self-weaning." That is how a child self-weans... they gradually stay at the breast less and less, and the interval between nursings gets longer and longer as well.

At this age... you do NOT necessarily "have to" nurse "on demand." She is nearly 2 years old. But I know some Moms do. The rationale being that the child is ALSO getting whole milk/other dairy in their diet as well nutritionally, and other solid regular foods by 2 years old. Which is the case of how my kids were.

My friends, put Band-Aids on their nipples, to wean their kids. And they said it worked for them. They simply said to their toddler "Mommy has a boo-boo...." or, "Mommy doesn't have milk anymore..." etc.

Or, some Moms only "allow" nursing at night-time... by teaching their child that when the sun goes down, this is the time. Not during daytime.

Just some ideas, and how my kids self-weaned. For my kids and self-weaning, I did not 'force' them to do so or by a certain deadline... but in my daughter's case, I coaxed her and we would talk about it. And then when she was about 2.5 years old, just one day all on her own she told me "I don't drink from you anymore..." and she giggled like she couldn't believe she was still breastfeeding. And that was it. She stopped, completely. On her own. My son just stopped on his own right away and just did NOT want to nurse anymore either, when he was about 1 year old. Each child being different.

All the best,
Susan

My son doesn't drink any other form of milk other than mine as well. What I started doing was just removing one nursing session per day and doing the day time ones first because it's easier to distract. He will drink water and very diluted juices...or juices I make myself from our juicer. But nothing else... not even smoothies... surprisingly enough the only nursing sessions I still struggle with are the night ones and that's partly because I can't handle his crying at night. But like I said... go one nursing session at a time.

my daughter is almost the exact same age and we're down to the night time/before bed nusing session only. she'll ask sometimes during the day ("nurse?") and I reply that we only do that at bedtime but that we can snuggle instead and/or I give her the water sippy cup. if she asks at other times, it's usually a comfort thing and she's needing some extra TLC.
The night time crying was managed by the switch to my husband going in her room to help her settle instead of me and therefore no opportunity to nurse. it took awhile for it to take hold but it worked and I dropped the middle of the night feedings long ago (unless she was sick or we were travelling and she just wasn't sleeping in a hotel).
good luck to you!

Never in a million years would I have believed that I would nurse for as long as I did, I mean do! Ha ha! I nursed on demand for the first two years of my sons life. It was easy. It worked. We traveled extensively and it was the perfect solution for us. He began solids at eleven months, and LOVES food! He is now three and a half and at night for about two minuets he still nurses. It is coming to an end. It has to. Sometimes he will go for days without, but then ask if it's ok to nurse. He never used me as a pacifier and would say, "Mom, you're empty now." I must be drying up completely and that seems to be natural for the both of us.

As for HOW to ween, take it slowly, eliminating one feeding at a time. Try to suggest a snack when she asks to nurse. First ask her if she is hungry. She may just need a hug or some attention. I would suggest feeding her a snack to fill her up before bed too. Just make it a part of night time routine, along with sitting on the potty and brushing her teeth. I wouldn't go for the cold turkey approach myself, though both my sisters did and though it was h*** o* both mother and child, today the kids are all just fine. I chose to forgo the tears and yelling and let nature take it's course. This is NOT for everyone, I had a lot of pressure from all those loving folks around me to cut him off. But I have no regrets. Do what works for the BOTH of you!
Good Luck!

Well, we started by making "rules" on when my daughter could breastfeed. The first rule was "no breastfeeding out of the house or when people come over". If you follow that rule and have family coming for thanksgiving or are going somewhere for thanksgiving you automatically have the rule in place and she knows it. From there it is really just sticking to it.

Try cutting down the nursing over the next few weeks. When she is hungry/bored give her other snacks or find something else to distract her. When weaning my daughter she would wake up very early in the morning to nurse. So i started replacing that with rice cereal (she was 11 months). She did fine. I continued replacing breast times with other food or stimuli. It wasnt traumatic or dramatic. I nursed every 30 min or hour the whole time and she did great weaning. Good luck

I would get her down to one feeding a day. Stop nursing her before bed...if you do, and it should be pretty easy. If you stay busy playing, reading and what not...they forget. Good Luck! J.

GREAT job nursing so long and allowing your child to self wean. if you want to speed things up, only drop one feeding about every 2-3 weeks. Distract her w/different things during that usual nursing time. Le Leche League has several fantastic books on weaning and they include many other toddler issues, look at your library or on their web site.

Hi E.,

I'm still breastfeeding our almost-26-month old! I had no intention of being an extended breastfeeder and assumed she's self-wean way before now. But I didn't see any end in sight so I started to wean her 4 months ago... we're going very slowly, obviously. I just don't have the heart to cut her off cold turkey. She LOVES breastfeeding and I don't see any reason to rush her, or to introduce another battle with a toddler!

It might be tricky for you since you are with her all of the time. We cut out mornings first because she is in daycare then. And I think we started breastfeeding only at home a while ago, too.

Then, this summer we were traveling a lot and we cut out the naptime nursing because she would fall asleep in the car (we don't have a car here, but we did on vacation). Then when we got home I told her we weren't nursing before naptime anymore (since we hadn't been for several weeks). She complained at first, but I was calm and loving and sweet and gave her hugs and didn't get upset when she cried. I think she cried mostly because she was tired, not because she was so devastated about not breastfeeding. But it wasn't easy! But in a few days she was happy to just snuggle with me and have me tickle her feet and tell her stories as she fell asleep. So, we are still having a nice, close time together, but not breastfeeding.

After that it seemed like we were only breastfeeding at night. So, I told her this "rule" that we only breastfeed at night. Then if she'd ask to breastfeed during the day I'd say, "is it daytime?" and she'd say, "yes". And I'd ask her, "when do we breastfeed?", and she'd happily say, "nighttime!". We'd have this conversation almost every day, but she didn't get upset.

Now, nighttime weaning is another thing. When we came back from vacation this summer she wouldn't fall asleep on the breast anymore, which was actually very helpful because I had to come up with a different routine. During the night I've begun just saying "no" when I'm tired and don't feel like it. She fusses, but falls asleep by herself. It's hard because she's been sick a few times already this fall and it is really comforting to her, so we've actually been breastfeeding more at night. Otherwise I think we'd be further along in the weaning process. But we're making progress, slowly!

I think the trick is to follow natural changes that come. It's easy for us as mommies to be stuck in the pattern of breastfeeding as we always have. But if you take advantage of changes in your routine, or make some changes, like not being at home or having her fall asleep other ways, then some of the feedings will naturally disappear. If she's eating well (which our daughter is!) then you have to just remind yourself that she doesn't NEED it anymore and you are just both in the habit of breastfeeding.

Good luck! Let me know what works for you!

H.

Just explain to your daughter the new limits and keep increasing them. My first son, now 3, was very reasonable when it came to ending nursing. I just explained to him that we only nursed when the sun was up, because the truth was I needed some SLEEP! He did GREAT! A little complaining but no real crying or anything. Once we were down to the one morning feeding, it was easy enough to just finish the job and quit nursing altogether. He was done by 15 months.
His little brother screams and cries when I try the same technique. Also, we have been forced to move in with my husband's family due to this blasted economy, so I don't really feel like I can let him cry much at night. I really feel like I'm being held hostage by my 20 month old and came to your replies in the hopes of finding some cool solution. =(
I am finally now able to, after several failed attempts, get him to release me after a short nurse at night by saying "OK, enough. Now go to sleep, night-night.". I had become an all night pacifier before that. He still nurses a couple of times each night. Rarely during the day. If he asks to nurse during the day, I just feed him food.
Good luck! I'm sure if we have a third child, I will have a third and different tale to tell on the topic. :)

I nursed my son until he was almost exactly 2 years old. Like your daughter, he loved to breastfeed and mainly for comfort.

What worked for me was to keep him distracted. If he asked to nurse, I'd offer a snack or something else to drink or try to redirect him to another activity. He rarely forgot about his request, but my efforts would typically delay them at the very least. Also, I took note of the times when he was most likely to ask - e.g., when he saw me sitting down or in a traditional nursing spot - and I tried to avoid those cues.

The thing that actually ended it for us, though, was that he actually bit me about a week before his second birthday. I made a big deal about it (because it really did hurt) and even put a band-aid on my nipple. I told him that Mommy had an owie and he couldn't nurse until it got better. That made a big impression on him, and he didn't ask to nurse for a whole week. By the time he asked again, it was really easy just to direct him to something else. And that was basically it. It was a whole lot easier than I was expecting for as into it as he was.

Good luck!

My 24-month-old daughter just barely fully weaned. I'm pregnant and know I was drying up a few months ago (same thing happened with my son, he self-weaned at 19 months because there was nothing left around 4 months pregnant). In addition to me drying up, I suddenly was feeling repulsed and annoyed when she would nurse. For me, that was a sign (probably hormones) that we should start weaning.
She loved nursing, but as long as I distracted her with other activities before sleeping, she did well. If I ever lied down like we always did to nurse, she'd ask and get upset if she couldn't, but if I read to her in my lap or sat at the edge of her bed while singing or reading a story before sleep times it worked much better. Not sure how this would have worked for my son, as he was very high-needs, but it worked for my dd.

I also want to mention that at 2-years-old, kids are old enough to talk to about their nursing. Put stipulations or rules on it or explain to them what is going to be happening during the weaning process, so they don't feel like you're just neglecting them or not giving them what they want. I like the advice of telling the toddler (when feedings are only in the morning and night) "we now have nursies only when Mr. Sun comes up and Mr. Sun goes down.". Then you have to stick with whatever guidelines you place on breastfeeding or it can get complicated and difficult.

We took it slow, going from a couple nursings a day to eventually one a day (she didn't necessarily have a favorite feeding time), to her asking randomly every couple days. Finally, she asked a couple weeks apart. At that point, I told her that my milk was all gone. She'd ask "Milk all gone?" and I'd say "Yes." I still let her try to nurse for a few seconds just to prove it to her and she disattached quickly and didn't ask again.

One extra stipulation I put on the nursings toward the end (when it was clearly all for her and I was just enduring until the weaning was complete) was I would count her down when I was done and couldn't take it anymore. I would say, "Okay, you need to be done now. Mommy's all done." If she didn't come off within a couple seconds, I would warn her then count down from either 10 or 3. "You've got three more seconds. 3-2-1. All done" She almost never complained or tried to keep nursing. She understood and learned the rules quickly.

Your experience is going to be different than anyone else's, so just do your best. You'll do great. And I applaud you for breastfeeding this long!

Best of luck,
N.

I'm going through the same thing with my son...I gave up afternoon nursings first, got him sort of used to that, then gave up mornings...now I'm just doing evenings and nighttime and hoping to let him just naturally wean off himself. We'll see how that goes. Just do it gradually for both your comfort and for him.

Also, if he needs to "nurse" for comfort to sleep or something, I just put some milk in a bottle and give him that. He's not always thrilled with that since he'd rather have me, but it works...

Good luck.
-M