Help Needed with Weaning

There is no "time for her to get off the boob". Your daughter will wean when she is ready. To wean her before this time is traumatic. If you can live with that, then by all means, wean her by following the suggestions of the others but if you're concerned about what's best for your child, do not wean.

I have a 28 month old boy and sometimes I do want to wean him because it does take a lot out of you, but then I remember how important it is to allow the child to self-wean. It is recommended by la leche league. Do some research on that. Great book is by Dr. Linda Palmer called Baby Matters. Most comprehensive, scientifically-based, referenced book on baby care.

Totally understand. My first was 26mos old and my second just over 3 years old. I was in the same boat for the most part. With my first, I was 5 mos pregnant so I didn't have any milk and that made it a little easier. With my second, I slowly took away nursing sessions. I started with no more nursing when Mr. Moon is out (that eventually stopped the night nursing) then no more nursing when Mr. Sun is up. It was very slow and gradual. Both of my kids loved nursing, they still talk about it (they are 6 and 3.5) and both were weaned very gently. Silly as it may sound to someone that hasn't been "there". With my son, I'd say, "ok, you can nurse but when Mommy counts to 10 (I'd count slowly) we'll switch sides, count to 10 again and then we are all done. This totally worked for him. It shortened the nursing session, got him what he wanted (a little milk) and helped to slowly wean him. He was also at this point only nursing every 5-6 days. So he was pretty much done, I think he just wanted to make sure it wasn't going away for good! LOL!

Best wishes to you and your daughter,
M.

Your daughter IS already weaning. She doesn't nurse much right now.

My daughter was the same way, and I let her self-wean...and she did at about 2.5 years old. On her own. And yes, like your boys, my son "weaned" quicker and earlier than my daughter, and my son also used a pacifier and could self-soothe better, versus my daughter.

Just nurse her IF she asks perhaps... that is still "child led" weaning. That is what I did, versus just nursing out of "habit" or routine. My daughter also did not use a pacifier or lovey...although I tried. She was just not into the self-soothing with anything except with using "me." But, once she did wean, it was fine, and she could in fact sleep on her own. Albeit it took patience after nursing her for all that time. But I do not regret any of it. I just believed in self-weaning.

Just wait and see... like I said, your daughter is weaning in fact. For me, I was also soooo ready to wean...but I let my daughter self-wean. And looking back, even my Hubby was proud of the extended breastfeeding I did for our kids.

Your girl will stop. For my daughter it just popped up one day and she "announced" that she did not need to breastfeed anymore and she was a "big girl", and in fact she thought it was "silly" she was doing it. So there came a "natural" inclination within her....that her little voice inside her was letting her know that she was all done and perfectly fine and didn't need to anymore.

Each child is indeed different. It will end, and it will be a milestone and a bittersweet fond memory for Mommy.

All the best,
Susan

Hi J.,

I'm sure you have a million responses on this but I didn't check them so sorry if I'm repeating! I also nursed my 3rd until she was 28 months. I was really ready to wean and she was not. The holidays might be in your favor!! If you are around lots of other people and kids sometimes you can distract her.

I started with putting her off. Like if she'd ask I'd say I am doing the dishes right now in a minute. The goal with that was simple boundaries. Giving her a new message of "you have to wait" plus then I'd try and get her invovlved in something else. Then I started saying there is no more milk its all gone. Our biggy was the in the middle of the night. I finally told her there is no more its all gone go back to sleep and for three nights in a row she did. She would still ask during the day and I'd say its all gone and get her a drink which was not at all what she wanted but she dealt with it pretty good. Hang in there and do what works best for you!!

Smiles,
S.

I'm going through this right now with my little boy who just turned two. I TOTALLY understand your feelings, and how you don't want to break her little heart. I've been talking to my son, and just gently explaining that he's getting to be a bigger boy now, and how we're not going to "do as much mama's milk" anymore. I've also told him a few times that eventually we won't do mama's milk anymore, just to kind of give him a headsup. I pointed out to him that his dad doesn't have his mama's milk (eeeew, but he's very interested in what daddy does and doesn't do), and also some of his older friends and how they don't have their mama's milk anymore. (Without shaming him in any way, just pointing it out). And for the last two weeks I've been really consistent about only nursing in his room, that this is the only place we're going to have milk anymore. (That way, during the day when you're out, it's easier to deflect). Also, I told him no more milk at night, that he can have milk before bedtime, and in the morning. So pretty much, we're down to twice a day. There have been a couple of times in the evening when he's asked and I haven't been able to offer him something else that will satisfy him and we've had an extra session, but I've really tried to keep those to a minimum, and very short in duration. Anyway, I'm probably not offering anything you don't already know, but I did want to offer some moral support. They're such loves, and little for such a short time. And I think some kids might self-wean (I've read it often doesn't happen until they're between 4-6!), but I think some, like my little guy, probably need a little help easing off the boob. By the way, three nights a week I leave at 8pm to teach a yoga class and my husband puts him to bed with a story, no sippy cup or bottle or anything, so clearly he doesn't need to nurse, it's just a comfort and a preference. Anyway, hope this helps a little :)

Is there a place or something that she usally nurses on? Sometimes taking that away so not rocking her there when tired works. You could also offer her something that she really likes to drink in place of you. My oldest refused to wean until she got a cold at 21 months. She also had a pacifier so she just took that a little more. My second was even more in to nursing and I thought I would never get him weaned but at 21 months he got a hair cut and went to bed two nights straight with out nursing and that was it. The next night he tried to nurse and I simply said no. It was a little hard but after two more nights he got it. No matter what he tried it was not go to happen. There were still times that he would ask and I would just say no you are a big boy now. I think that when they have something else like a pacifier it helps but even with out it can be done. Good luck and enjoy all of your little ones.

Hi J.,
Throught your sharing, it seems that your worry of "break her heart" is very strong. If your daughter is 26 months she can learn very fast how to use a bottle or a sippy cup. In addition, she has teeth already, trying new food would help keep her occupied the sucking needs (unlike infant who has no teeth). I think it's important that each child gets a trainning time to learn how to fall asleep on their own. So if she still rely on your nursing to fall asleep, she will not have an opportunity to learn this important skill. When you wean her, she may cry, but it doesn't mean she feel dejected or has a broken heart. It means a new way of doing thing that she not used to for now but she will adapt. This new stage is healthy for both her and you. She will learn a life-long important skill. When you focus on this positive view, you will be confident to go through the training with her. Both of my daughters were weaning off around 6-10mons. My older one (now is 4) weaned herself off at 6 mos old and I transfered her straight to bottle and sippy cup. My younger one (now is 13mos) got weaned off at 10 mos while I was going through a surgery in the hospital. It took her only 1 day to get used to the bottle (especially when she was hungry) even though she did not like bottle and pacifier before that. Hope this help!

Replace boob with sippy cup on your lap. Worked for me....although I did this at 14 months. Time for her to get off the boob!
Good luck

When I was ready to wean, I rubbed lime on my nipple. She went to drink, stopped, looked at me and said "Ucky". The next time we'd normally nurse, she pointed to my chest and said "ucky". It's worth a try. Have a sippy cup on hand, and give her a drink in that.

Oh, my daughter was 20 mos at the time. Good Luck,
J.

My daughter was about 26 months old when I tried to wean her. It worked, without even a tear! For the first week, I counted to 10 (at any pace you want) while she nursed, then switched sides and counted again. Keep switching sides until she's done. After 5-7 days, count to 9 each side and so on. My daughter stopped by the time we counted to 5, about 5 weeks into the weaning process. I guess she was bored with the switching! It worked perfectly for us, but it usually takes 5-10 weeks.