My daughter is 4 months old and has been sleeping through the night since about 6 weeks. She typically goes to bed between 8 and 9 and stays asleep until 6-7 in the morning. The problem is that she doesn't nap well during the day. She will usually need a nap around 9 in the morning and sleeps for maybe 30-40 minutes then wakes up crying. She is usually still tired and unless I pick her up and rock her back asleep she will not go to sleep. She takes a pacifier for naps and at naptime. If I hold her or lie/sleep next to her, she will sleep for 2 hours or so. But she doesn't like to be alone, at least that is what I think her problem is. Any suggestions would be great, as I would like her to get at least one good nap in during the day.
I think this could also be because of the cereal issue...She may be needing something else in her belly to help her sleep better....Try feeding before nap time....
You've already identified the problem -- she does not want to soothe herself to sleep. She depends upon you. This is not a big problem with a newborn...but healthy sleep requires the child to learn to soothe herself back to sleep on her own as the child gets older.
If you haven't yet, start to establish a very specific, consistent naptime and bedtime routine. Use this routine at every single sleeping session -- and to not vary it. She will learn that this is her cue to settle herself and prepare to sleep. Our Pediatrician always advised us to put our babies down drowsy, but awake, so that they aren't shocked when they wake-up and don't find you there. As for breaking her habit of needing you to rock her to sleep and soothing her when she wakes, you will have to stop picking her up and holding her once you put her in the crib. This may require a few nights of cry-it-out, or a week or two of you offering "gradual extinction" soothing (going in, rubbing her back and assuring her that you are still there -- but not giving-in and picking her up.)
For excellent information about children's sleep needs (and for a lot of great methods on helping your baby through these problems) take a look at "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Marc Weissbluth, MD. He gives specific directions on how to do the cry-it-out or gradual extinction.
If she needs your presence in order to sleep better, I would suggest placing one of your well-worn, dirty shirts in the crib (something that has your smell). I did that with my son, and it helped a lot.
Scroll down and re-read Mom LK's advice.
Then, go out and buy or borrow "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" by Dr. Marc Weissbluth. He is a Chicago-area pediatrician who specializes in infant/child sleep issues with over 30 years of research with thousands of patients.
Your daughter's sleeping will improve in mere days. We didn't start these techniques until our son was 6 months old, and I wish we would have started sooner. He was super fussy and an unhappy baby...until we learned more about how to help him sleep better. It was like he was a changed baby overnight!
I have a six month old who is the same way sleeps 10-12 hours at night but is a horrible napper. I try and lay down with her for one nap a day so she will get at least an hour and a half. I just take that as my me time. I lay down for an hour grab a good book and remember that I won't get this time back. After an hour if she is still sleeping I will sneak away to do something for myself and I just put the monitor on her and come running if she wakes up since she;s on my bed. Good luck
sleep begets sleep, put her down for the first nap earlier, say within an hour and a half of waking.
Get "Healthy Sleep Habits, Healthy Child", by Marc Weissbluth, MD - he's out of northwestern. This book became like a bible for us with our two daughters. We were so sleep deprived with the first one, my mom read it and highlighted the guidelines for the 16 month mark - it was a lifesaver! They're now 5 and 7 and GREAT sleepers!
good luck.
Mine is the same way. She's 13 mos. now but has never been a napper. I'm as attentive as I can be. If I have the time to let her sleep on or near me I do, but if she wakes up after 30 minutes and is done, that's just how it is. The rest of my life kind of suffers for it, but this is what they call "high-need" I think. There will probably be months where she naps more, and then some where she naps less, and we've just gotta roll with it!
If yours is like mine, then the good part about this kind of baby is that they are very vocal about their needs, and have a special kind of determination that I'm hoping will serve her well later in life. It IS a blessing in disguise.
So you still swaddle her? My 5 month olds still need to be swaddled for nap and bedtime.
Good luck.
Christy - I agree with "Mom LK"'s response. My son is now almost 9 months old and we had the same problem as you started around 3 months. Nothing seemed to work until around 6 months when the naps finally started getting longer. He NEEDED the longer naps and grew a BIG sleep deficit... I ended up needing to put him to sleep every 45 min for 2 weeks until he caught up. Definitely don't wait to correct this.... it will be worse later. I'm sure you don't want to make her cry it out but if nothing else works, I recommend it. We did it as a last resort and it is now finally working at 9 months. People will say to put her to sleep on her stomach but don't do that - wait until she can put herself on her stomach because it can be unsafe before then. It does help once they are old enough to sleep that way. If cry it out doesn't work, give it up for awhile and try again... it doesn't always work the first week and she may not be ready for it but it's worth trying again a few weeks later. Good luck!
try putting her down earlier for nap, probably by 8:15 or 8:30.
when she wakes up wait 10 minutes before you go to get her, this will give her time to learn to go back to sleep on her own.
Since laying next to her works, you can gradually reduce that need. Spend a week laying with her as she naps and make sure that you get a schedule down pat. After the nap times are set and she is used to taking 2 hours at each nap time (get books to read or listen to your ipod, or sleep while she naps), then let her still nap in your bed but you aren't right next to her. After a few days of this, gradually move farther away from her.
N.
You can't spend her every waking moment with her. You're spoiling her. Make sure she is warm, dry and not hungry. You could start her day a little earlier on some days doing the morning routine at that time and then putting her back down for a nap. Give her time to be tired from being changed, feed and bathed, then nap. You have to make your schedule around hers while she's a baby. That does not include holding her at her every whim...they get the hang of that right away. When she's sick, that's different. Be hands on with the holding, loving, and comforting.
My daughter did the same thing. What I eventually did (somewhere between 4-5 months), is to set the rule (mostly for myself) that a nap had to last 1 hour. If she woke up early, I wouldn't go into to get her until the hour had passed. I generally planned some cleaning project to keep myself busy during that time, so that I could bear her crying. The first day I shovelled the sidewalk down our entire block! It worked really well - by the second day she was sleeping longer, and could even put herself back to sleep. A friend of mine had the same problem and started putting her son to sleep on his stomach (once he could hold his upper body up with his arms) and that fixed it for him. Hope you find something that works!
Christy, Where does your little one take her naps? in the crib in her room or a playpen in the main part of the house? could be she needs to be in her regular sleeping place. It is normal for the nap times to decrease a little bit as they get bigger. At 4 months she should be taking a nap in both morning and afternoon. although yours is getting a good full nights sleep. maybe a nap of 40 minutes is enough for the morning nap. does she sleep in the swing? or a bouncy chair? my daughter would only sleep in the swing. my mom said her first word was wheeeee lol. maybe she is hungry? are you bottle or breast feeding? if its the breast that goes thru their system a whole lot faster. Is she too bit to swaddle up with a receiving blanket? if not then try that before you lay her down. it will keep her feeling held securely. might help. good luck
Unless you nip it in the bud now, it'll just get worse. My 12 month old went from where your daughter is to not even napping at all. I rock and nurse him to sleep, but as soon as I stand up, or get him in the crib, he wakes up and won't go back to sleep without assistance. You don't necessarily need to make her cry it out, but do something, or you will be where I am now.
