Sleepovers! - Tempe,AZ

Mine all started around 3-4 when they started having sleepovers, both at my house and away at other's houses. My 3 year old (almost 4) is actually having someone stay over tonight.

My husband doesn't understand it - he thinks they are too young and it should start around 8 or 9. But sleepovers were a very big part of my childhood from early on (age 4) through high school. And they are very fond memories.

My daughter started with her friends that we knew well around 4 or 5. To this day, she is now 18, there is someone at my house at least 1 weekend night.

It has been a special part of her growing up for us. Most sleepovers have been at my house because I have the larger house, they have the entire upstairs with 3 bedrooms library and game room for themselves, everyone has a private bed, most other children have siblings at home, and I know what is going on at my house.

A lot of the children who stay here tell me they like stepping away from their own homes, and families for a nice break. I always make a special breakfast on the mornings of sleepovers.

We never had any trouble. I have picked my daughter up a couple of times from other places when she has notified me that something was not right and she wanted to come home. No biggie.

The way I see it ..... you can't keep them under a rock or wrapped up in bubble wrap until they are of age to let go. Letting go is in baby steps which helps you as a parent and helps the children be more independent as they grow older.

I have college age and upper high school age boys. We never had sleepovers and I didn't let my kids go on sleepovers. My college son is totally independent (except for the part of his college expenses we pay), including getting himself summer jobs. My high schooler wakes himself in the morning and gets himself to school, and asks for very little help - I'm usually the one bugging him to let me help him with anything.

So... my kids are pretty well adjusted and self sufficient. Not attending sleepovers never hurt them.

If you aren't comfortable having them, don't have them. If you do have them, don't be one of those moms who just leaves the kids to their own devices. Kids get into too much trouble like that. I'd listen to my friends go through their tales of woe or hear them fuss about other moms' parties and be glad at least that I wouldn't have to put up with any of it.

Just my two cents...

My kids started around four, when they started making friends at nursery school. My boys are both pretty good sleepers, were both comfortable with sleeping away from home, and I was familiar with the families of their friends. Now that they are almost 8 and 11 they do lots of sleepovers. We seem to have at least one extra kid sleep over every weekend around here!

3 I think. But I was pretty much watching a friends kids and they all slept over back and forth so we could have date nights and stuff.

My daughter is 5 and she's only had 1 so far - but it was at a trusted friend's house with her daughter and they were only 8 houses away - and she did great. She would love to do more with other friends from school but I told her we need to know the parents better and they have to be okay with having her over as well as their child staying at our house so we can return the favor, and that might not happen for a while. She also has a good friend across the street from us and I know the parents very well, so I wouldn't have an issue with them - but our daughter is pretty independent and thinks sleepovers are really exciting.

Age 7. Have someone come to your house first.

Between second and third grade to have one friend over. However, a few slumber parties my dd has went to have been disasters. The last one - about half the kids called their parents in the middle of the night to go home (fortunately my dd wasn't one of them). I'm doing my best to avoid hosting a slumber party. I need my sleep.

My son slept over our neighbor/friends house when he was 4 :) We started early but ONLY with people that I trust and know...

Family friends and cousins, 3 or 4, school friends, 7 or 8.

Age 5 or 6? with good friends of ours, close to home. She's been enjoying sleepovers ever since! She's never had a problem being away from home for a night or two.

My son has only had two sleepovers, and they have been 'in care' sleepovers with beloved adults, not 'social' sleepovers with friends. I'll be waiting until he is at least 9 or so before we start/allow those, and only if I see that he's mature enough.

Really depends. I remember 3rd grade she got invited to a sleep over and i was like know you can stay to 10 then I pick you up. But then I realized I knew the father from worksituation and he'd be stupid to ruin his whole carreer. So she had a sleep over and enjoyed it. I've had kids at my house as well. I'd say limited in elementary school but usually by 5th grade its ok.

Second grade, she was 7.

A classmate invited her. We knew the girl since 1st grade. He mother is a lovely gracious woman. The girl would come over and play, she was always very polite and the girls got along very well.

I did not worry at all, I knew they would have a great time and she would be safe.

My daughters

Family:3
Friends:9

Well I assume you're talking with non family members?? For family, my kids started before a year. It was awesome.

My oldest is 5.5 and not in K until the fall. She hasn't had a non family sleepover yet, although I wouldn't necessarily be opposed to it. It would depend on the situation but for our super close friends, I'd do it. For other kids that she meets at school, etc. I think I'd probably be okay with it starting soon, but I wouldn't necessarily think a parent was weird if they didn't' want their K or even 1st grader spending the night somewhere. After that though, I kind of think they are old enough unless there is a kid who is just super scared or whatever. If your daughter is begging for it I'd say she's probably old enough. Maybe you could have someone sleep at your house first just so you can ease into it?!

She had friends sleepover about age 8 and she went to sleepover parties at age 9 but it was too early and the girls ended up fighting and getting into trouble (and crying, and calling their parents in the middle of the night).

Most of the parents have stopped having sleepover parties and I think they will probably all resume around age 12.

Having a friend sleep over or going to a friend's house is okay, but I never count on her getting much sleep and she's usually crabby the next day so we don't do it too often.

I probably won't ever allow sleepovers with random classmates. I will only allow sleepovers where I know the family and parents extremely well and have hung out with the parents and got to know them well. Basically only family and long-time family friends. For me it's too risky, and kids can hang out until late. They don't need to necessarily be together while they sleep to have a good time. Fortunately for me, my kids are best friends with their cousins, so I'm hoping it won't be too much of an issue.

To answer your question, starting at age 6 my kids have had sleepovers with people I've known since high school. They have kids my kids' age and we've been friends for 20 years and the husbands were roommates in college and so we know them well.

I come from an extremely large family and my children are lucky to have grown up with cousins their own age. Their first sleepovers were with relatives when they were about 2 years old. This gave all the parents a chance at a 'night off', and we were all used to having multiple kids around anyway.
I also had did sleepovers with a few of the moms from my mommy and me group (same moms in the group since our children were +/- 1 years old) at about 21/2 - 3 years old.
The most important thing was that I felt comfortable with the other moms and their families as well as having their children stay with me. I know the children would be watched and cared for the way I would.
I always knew the parents and children for sometime and my children spent time on play dates with the other kids (as well as them being at my house).