My Daughter Wants a Sleepover Party for Her 7Th Birthday

What would "I" do?

I would make it a sleepover for all of them; or
I would make it a sleepover for none of them; or
I would reduce the party guest list to only those whom I felt comfortable having over for a sleepover.

Yeah, I'm in the NONE stay over camp. Pick a different night for the sleepover. Include everyone or no one.

We started allowing sleep over parties in 2nd grade. I allow them to invite 5-6 kids. I would never invite only 2-3 out of 7 to stay over. If 7 is too many for you for a sleep over then I would either invite only 1 to stay the night or invite less kids from the start and invite them all to stay.

Do a "Mock" Sleepover....after the party have all the girls change into their PJs - make sure they bring their pillows and a blanket. Have popcorn/movie snacks and a couple of movies for them to watch to wind down the day - then have parents pick them up at a set time.

My friend recently told me about something similar happening to her daughter. She attended a birthday party and noticed many of the other girls had overnight bags, sleeping bags and pillow with them. Then, throughout the party the girls talked about how much fun they were going to have sleeping over, what movies they would watch and so on. It turned out all but a few of the girls had been invited to stay over. Anyway, her daughter was really sad and unable to enjoy the party at all. I would either have the sleepover with the "inner circle" on another day, limit the entire party to only close friends, or make an effort to meet the other girls before you invite them to the sleepover.

I think 7 kids is perfectly manageable for a sleepover.

Stipulate on the invitiation: We'll be having a costume party, crafts, games and pizza. Pickup will be 9pm. If your daughter will be staying for the sleepover afterwards, please RSVP. Morning pickup time is 8:30am.

ETA: It's likely that half of the parents won't allow their kids to sleep over anyhow. They'll say 7 is too young. So you might end up with 3-5 regardless. ;-)

ETA2: I don't recommend late night parties. Parents hate picking up kids at 11pm.

You can't invite some and not others to stay. Feelings will be hurt. Invite all or none.

Just do the evening party and save the small sleepover for another time. This is a delicate situation and I can say that when parents go to pick up and hear that their kid wasn't invited to the sleepover but other kids are staying-- that's just not cool.

I'm not usually about the 'invite all or none', but in this case, it would be pretty tacky. You ARE making it too hard! Tell your girl that she can have a sleepover another time and that the party is what you'll focus on for now. Better to be a little disappointed in your own household than have parents going home from a party with disappointed little girls who weren't invited feeling badly about themselves-- and possibly you.

Oh please don't do this. The girls who don't get to stay WILL be hurt, and they are very young, too young to really handle it gracefully.
I think slumber parties are better suited to groups of kids who are a little older, old enough to go to camp, so around 9 or 10. I was a long time scout leader and I can tell you it works out better all around at that age.
Time to put on your mom hat and make the call, either none of the girls stay overnight, or your daughter has a smaller party where they all stay. That's what I would do.

You either have a sleepover party or you don't.

If you choose to hide and invite a select few for sleepover, it will not be a secret and the children not invited for sleepover will find out as will the parents and then there are possible hurt feelings and damaged friendships with the children and parents.

Have the sleepover option open for ALL those invited. Some may choose to take you up on it, others may not but in any case ALL are invited.

My sleepover hosting days are over but we routinely had children at our house every weekend. Sleepovers were a lot of fun!

From the looks of other responses, I must be the odd man out because we participated in sleepovers (as well as most everyone else we knew) from about Kinder throughout high school. Just make sure they are supervised properly, know that there will be little sleep and make it fun.. The children will love it and have good memories.

I've supervised many sleepovers and I think the most girls we ever had was about 14. They had a blast with mani/Pedi's, facials, movies, food, wii and fun.

It's tough. I just had 2 sleepovers for my daughter's bday. The 11/12 year olds were ok. They bearly talk. They come out for food then back in the room they go. The 8/9 year olds have drama. Each had 3 spend the night. The younger's ones played well for awhile. Then it started, she doesn't like me, she called me ugly, she lives in a small house, etc. Also I made sure each parent knew of the party outside school. Well the day of the party a mom calls to see about her daughter coming. I had to tell her, her child was not invited and I'm sorry the ones invited made it known. I never met the mom and don't know her child. Then the mom asked if another child was invited and I said no, never heard of them. So I had that drama too. We used to go away for a weekend and celebrate our anniversary and birthday's together. No drama and cost less. Good luck if you decide to do it. The day after the party I went to school and the girls were talking about the party and the child that wasn't invited had to hear it. I had to keep changing the subject. More sleepovers this weekend where my child goes to their house instead of mine.

I personally don't thing 7 is too young for a sleep over, my son is 6 now and he he has been having sleep overs now for over a year. I think you should ask your daughter what she wants to do first but i think for a birthday 7 is a good sleep over number. Hope she has a great birthday.

I did a sleepover for my daughter's 8th b'day. 6 girls including my daughter. Movie, then sleepover.

THE.BIGGEST.NIGHTMARE.EVER...for me, that is.

I will never go through that again.

Aside from that, if you're uncomfortable, then it's a bad idea. Maybe just one girl, your daughter's best friend. Or just nix the sleepover altogether. After the afternoon you describe (which sounds awesome and fun), it's highly likely the girls will be overtired and/or overstimulate. To continue it onto a sleepover where they'll stay up late, keep each other up, certainly keep YOU up might end up being a NIGHTMARE. It will *certainly* ruin any plans for the next day as those girls will be exhausted.

I'd wait 'til next year, then do JUST a sleepover party without all the afternoon activities beforehand.

I wouldn't do that because it would definitely make the other girls that are not sleeping over feel bad. If you want to have 2-3 girls spend the night then I would make it a separate night or just have it open for all to sleep over. Just know that you might end up with 7 girls overnight which could be a lot of work. Or you can just make it a sleepover and only invite the 2-3 girls you want spending the night. I personally think 7 is a little young for sleepovers. We just had a first sleepover for my son when he turned 9 this year and we only had 3 boys sleep over and that was a lot of work.

Invite all or none to stay over. Seven is a manageable number and not all will stay over anyway so I would invite them all to stay over.

If you are not 100% comfortable with the idea of all of them sleepover, I would not do a slumber party. It really should be all or none and I would not sign on for more than I knew I was comfortable with.
I am finding that most of the parents in our area at least have a "no sleepovers" policy anyway.
We have done sleepovers in the past and I have decided I am done with them. They are NEVER smooth for me. There is always a problem...one kids cannot sleep unless the tv is on, or a kid barfs, or one kid starts crying at bedtime because she misses her dad, or my other children are upset because they don't have friends sleeping over and end up being super pesty. Or a kids mom wants her kid home at 6 am the next day for soccer practice and meanwhile another kids mom won't answer her phone and her kid is stuck at our house till 1 pm the next day... I need my sleep and having all these kids over really puts a kink in our family routine.
Your party plan sounds really fun anyway without the sleepover.

Not a good idea. It will appear that you're playing favorites. The children will be hurt, and the parents will be offended.

Better just to have the party. It sounds as if it will be a lot of fun. Let your daughter that she can start sleepovers later.. starting with just one guest.

I would do an "almost" sleepover, where the girls do their party stuff and then change into pjs and camp on the floor to watch a movie and have popcorn. After the movie ends (at 8:30 or 9pm) everyone goes home.

Let you daughter have a sleepover with just a couple of friends another time.

I would absolutely not do this - it will cause hurt feelings among the girls that some stay and some don't. You can't expect the girls that stay to not say anything to those that don't stay!!

Are you uncomfortable with the sleepover because it is so many or just because it is a sleepover. If the first, then limit the party to 1 or 3 girls and let them all stay all night. If the latter, then don't have a sleepover party till she is older and you are more comfortable.

7 is too young for a sleepover, but that's not what you are asking...

No, it's tacky to play favorites and if it's a 'secret' it's even worse because the girls will giggle and whisper about what they will do later in the night when the lesser pals leave. Then on next year, none of the slighted girls' parents will allow them to come.

I never let my daughter sleep over anyone's house until she was in middle school and even then it was only if I knew the family VERY well. And even then there were a few friend's whose house she was never allowed to sleep over. (if there were older brothers, boyfriends of older sisters, etc.)

I would go with having a regular party with the 7 girls and then a sleepover another day with 2 or three girls. Remember to always / only have an even number with a small group. 3 girls total or 4. Somehow one kid is alway sthe odd many out if there are 3 or 5 girls.

Then - finally - go into it knowing there will be very little sleep. HAve a lot of DVD's handy so when they're getting tired and one girl wants to keep them up later then a DVD goes in and they all get hypnotized and hopefully fall asleep...

Please invite all. As you said, some will not stay. And if they all do, what a fun party!

Do the sleep over for all or none. However I would not let my kiddo stay the night anywhere that I was not a good friend with that person. If I'd had been in their home numerous times, spent time with them with and without the kids, knew this person very well, know how they handle themselves when they're tired and it's the middle of the night and there are 7 girls bouncing off the walls...etc...

So even if you invited kiddo I would say no most likely.

I totally get that you're uncomfortable - I was too at first when my daughter started having sleepovers. BUT, I knew it was something that she would really enjoy so I just kept telling myself this is for my daughter and made the sleepovers as fun as possible with whomever she wanted to invite!!

I would invite them all and let them decide if they want to stay or not. Then when they were dropped off at my house, I would talk to the parent(s) and get phone numbers and any information I needed to know.

Additionally, just try and keep it simple. Have them bring a sleeping bag and pillow so you don't have to worry about coming up with enough blankets, etc. You might not even need the crafts - maybe have stuff on hand as back-up if needed. Usually, my daughter and her friends (at that age) just fixed each others' hair and/or did their nails and just played around with girly stuff. Played music, danced and just had a good time being together and being silly.

Good luck and have fun!!

We have decided, in place of sleepovers, to allow our kids to have late night parties. Pajamas, snacks, sleepover type games, but everyone has to go home at 10 or 11 pm. You could even get out lots of pillows and blankets and let them watch a movie. The point is you are always supervising, and everyone is less crabby the next day.

Just having one (best ) friend over is good for that age. I would not let my child attend a sleepover with a schoolmate who is ot very close to me. Any rational parent would do the same. Only an UNRATIONAL parent would expect otherwise, and you wouldn't want to get involved with those kinds of people anyways! You are worrying way too much. Why do you care so much about other peoples feelings over your own feelings and welfare?

the costume party is enough no reason for the sleepover. save that for another bday

I would do either a sleepover or a costume party. It would be a very LONG party to do both!

Sometimes my daughter would have a party and only ONE friend would sleep over. They would arrive early so no one saw the sleeping bag and they wouldn't mention it to anyone else.

In this case, I would keep the costume party and save the sleepover for next year.

Hello,
With just 4 to 5 more girls, shouldn't be too big of a deal. You just set the time to be picked up by earlier then the ones you are close to, in case you moms want to sit down & chat a while.

Just having 7 is nothing compared to my daughters 1st sleepover. I use to have those fun parties at an indoor amusement park, where you are paying for a minimum of kids, whether they show up or not. So, I over invited for her sleepover (19), figuring that only half would show, boy was I wrong. Every single girl came & only 1 went home (too afraid to stay the night).

Your daughter will have a great time & her friends will remember what a fun time they had.

Enjoy & Happy Birthday to your daughter,
C.

I would not do a sleepover. 10 years old would be the youngest I would allow.

I don't care what anybody else says, 7 is too young for a full-blown sleepover party. You're gonna have problems at that age with that many little girls "sleeping" at your house. I have two daughters and parties like that were always a nightmare. Just my .02. I would just end the party at a decent hour. And, no, I would not invite some and not others. Hurt feelings will result for sure. If your daughter wants a smaller sleepover party, have it on another day. I think a couple girls staying over at that age would be fine. But no way would I do 7.

Do a "mock" sleepover as one poster suggested or just do a regular party then have a sleepover w/her close friends on another date.

I wouldn't choose only the closest 3 friends to sleep over. It will cause
hur feelings & can poss alienate your child.

Don't count on some people saying no... My friend did that and ended up with way too many 8 year olds. She said it was horrible. It seems fairly common for the bday child around us to have just one friend sleep over. The friend could always leave and come back later or usually in the chaos of pickup, no one notices that one child hasn't left. Or there's a "reason" the child is staying over. She doesn't live locally, the parents "wanted to go out of town" etc. We did sleepovers that young and they've been fine when it's 1:1. I'm not sure I'll ever host a real sleepover party. I dread it. But there's no obligation at only 7 so don't let your daughter guilt you into it yet. :)

I guess I would invite them all to sleepover and leave it to the parents to decide if they want them to stay for that part. If you only invite a few, then you are going to have problems. Kids are not good at keeping secrets.

Or I would leave the party the way it is and have the kids your daughter is close to another weekend when things are less chaotic.

I agree that 7 is too young for a sleepover. I think I was in 3rd or 4th grade before I went to sleepover parties. My 8 year old daughter hasn't ever been to or had a sleepover yet.

I like the "almost sleepover" party idea, and a costume party sounds fun, but if it were me, I would allow my child to invite 2-3 friends MAX for a sleepover. Key there is invite ONLY 2-3 friends to the entire party, or don't do the sleepover and invite more. Not both...

Girls are very sensitive at this age (when are they not), and someone will find out and get her feelings hurt if they were not invited (coming from a grown up "girl" raising 2 boys ;).

I'd give your daughter the options and let her choose.

You could let her have a friend sleep over another weekend close to her bday, and have the party as planned. Or just have the party and tell her maybe she can have a sleepover for another birthday.