Sleeping Through the Night - Walled Lake, MI

A.,
congrats on the new baby coming. What I noticed when I moved my soon to be three year old (at the time he was 2 1/2) into his new big boy room/bed, he was waking up crying once a night for about a week. If I went in the room to try to calm him it would take forever(he would just cry and hold on to me)but if my husband went in to calm him it took less than 5 minutes and Aaron would say goodnight to daddy and go to sleep. I don't know if you are married or have a significant other but it might be worth a try to have that person go in to calm him. You never know it may work. My husband now is the one to get up if Aaron is having any issues. Good luck! J.

Another possibility is having him sleep next to your bed, maybe on a pallet or his own pallet, or even in a corner in your room. (I realize you're probably trying to get him out of your room, but it can help.) Maybe even just outside your room near the door would make a difference.

We have 4, and for the 1st, we had to get him out of my bed when I was pregnant with #2, but anywhere else just didn't settle well with either one of us (Mom or baby) he was 2, nearing 3 then. So, we put him on a mattress on the floor next to Mama. After the baby came, he was still in the room, but not so close to the bed. He was 3. Within a few months, we moved him to his own room. We were still breastfeeding, so I would feed him there in his own room before going to bed, and everything worked out fine. #2 was also a boy, so when his turn came to remove him from Mama's bed to make room for #3, we moved him right into his own bed in brother's room, and he was happy with that (he was 2 nearing 3). #3 was a girl. When it was time for her to make room for #4, she went on the floor next to Mama's bed. After the baby was born, she (2) went just outside the door (not in the walkway) of Mama's room, and that (at 3 1/2) is still her sleeping space. (#4 is 1 and not yet having to make way, but the plan is for him to go in with his brothers when the time comes.)

Good luck!

HI there,
You have to leave the room when he wakes up. It's tough but the only way. You go in comfort him with hugs and kisses make sure he has his lovey, if he has one, and leave. Be very matter of fact with him, "It's sleeping time, I'll cuddle with you in the morning" "we need our sleep so we can do ___in the morning" You then continue to go in ever few minutes making the time span longer each time until he goes back to sleep, do not talk to him when you go back and only go back in if he's crying. You're going to have a fight but you have to be strong and not lay in his bed. If you do, He'll continue wanting you every night and the waking in the night will never stop. If he happens to get sick clean in up with no talking.
Being that it takes so long(you being in the room could be the reason it is taking him over an hour to get back to sleep, stimulation) you could play soft classical music or one of those side of the crib toys that plays music. I used a toy that had a remote so I could turn it back on from the hall if needed. It doesn't sound like he's had the habit for long so it should be easy to break(easy for me to say anyway :-) LOL)! You could even have daddy go in when he wakes, he may calm down faster for him. This was always a struggle for my kids at 2. My youngest is 3 1/2 and has been doing great for about a year. Good luck!

My middle child has always done the same thing, right about 2 a.m. every nite she would wake up screaming and I tried like you wouldn't believe to comfort her, but nothing worked. I've never really been sure why, but I did get some ideas. Now, this is going to sound really crazy, but the house we lived in did previously have two men killed in her room, so I thought maybe, just maybe we actually did have ghosts. So, I did some research and tried doing some blessings in the room and through the whole house, and it seemed to work for the longest time...till we moved in with my husband. His grandmother died in what is now her room, and the screaming at 2 a.m. started again. Again, I did the blessings and the screaming stopped. I know, I know, it sounds really crazy, but it did seem to work. Check out the past history of the house and see if anyone has died there. Other than that, I don't know what to tell you.

Can you have Dad help calm him down? I would totally recommend getting Dad into the bedtime routine before #2 gets here.

Where did you move him from? Was he in your room? He could be honestly frightened. Imagine in a little childs mind, a new baby is coming and he was thrown out of your room, I know sounds harsh but in his mind that could be what is going on. It took my daughter a good month before she wanted to sleep in her room, we played in it we could read stories in it but it was too far away from me. I then read about moving her slowly so that she was adjusted to it and that worked much better. Oddly enough she helped move her bed into her room when she was ready.

Night terrors are very specific, you will know if he is having one or not. They will seem awake, but not coherent, will have no memory of it, appear to be in their dream, to us it seems as if they are hallucinating. Unfortunately, there isn't much to do with them, they have to work them through, if that is what he is having. I wonder though, if that is it, or if he is just having trouble adjusting to his new bed and the prospect of having a baby brother/sister. It sounds as if he is developing a habit. Make sure he has a safe toy or blanket, one that is there to cuddle with him when Mommy is sleeping. I agree with the other responder that you have to be firm and consistent about not going in his bed. Expect a few sleepless/bad nights and work it into your schedule. When baby comes along, you must be able to get some sleep or you won't be good for anyone. Can Daddy help with nightime?

I appreciate your post. I have a four year old that still does this.
The only way it usually works it to take him potty and make him wake up out of his dream. If I just hold him and coddle him he screams, throws up and the works.
I make him wash his hands and then often we take a walk until he is awake and communicating. We read a nice calming book I tell him to dream about the character in it.
We did find he has an acid-like reflux problem and bladder issues. That is why I make him go potty. Anyway, if he eats after 5, I have to prop him up on a foam or pillows.
Maybe he could get a little kiddie cd player or something with some lullabies...that is how I helped my middle child get through the night.

Could he be teething? Maybe his molars are coming in. Has he been sick at all lately? There is so much going around. Do you have a little night light in his room? Maybe he is waking up scared of it being dark.

When we go thru on of these phases, I try consoling her, rub her back for a minute or two, tell her "it's night time and it's time to sleep", give hugs and kisses and I'd also tell her that "mommy will be back to check on you in a few minutes". And I do go back to check on her.

Children at this age can have nightmares. I think they call them night tremors or terrors.

Good luck.

You have to get him to work it out on his own. Go in, get him calmed down, but then leave. Tell him he's a big boy now, and big boy's don't need mommy to sleep with them. Enlist your husband's help if needed. It will be a rough few nights, but eventually he should figure it out and be just fine. Our youngest daughter used to wake up in the middle of the night and cry. I got her settled down, and most of the time she would stay in bed - but talk and play quietly. As long as she didn't wake her sister up (they share a room) or wake us back up we didn't worry about it. She took a slightly longer nap in in the morning, but that was okay. She also out grew that. If you can get him calmed down, I wouldn't worry about if he plays quietly until he falls back to sleep (and he eventually will).