Potty Trained 3 1/2 Year Old Having Toilet Issues at School, Etc

There could be many reasons for the accidents at school.. Could be he is having too much fun to want to stop.He gets distracted or just plain does not want to deal with it. .

Could be you are more in tune to when he needs to go at home and tend to send him signals or make suggestions of potty time.. At school there is a classroom of kids, so teachers are not focused on any one child all of the time.. You just need to remind him to go when he needs to go. He will not miss out on fun, but he will if he has to stop and have all of his clothing changed.

Also 3 year olds are way more emotional than 2 year olds.. They are like little balls of raw emotions.. They have some of the words, but they are now beginning to have sympathy, empathy and still be self centered (not in a bad way).. all of this is like a year of PMS for some of them..

Try to have some extra patience with him. He is changing into more of an independent child, but he is still a "baby child" in many ways and still needs to be cuddled and guided sometimes.. Especially when changes in schedules, changes in locations and when tired..

Take him out of that school, and bring him home.
Look at his diet- NO SUGAR, really I mean it-little bodies cannot handle it, and it ruins behaviour.
Check Feingold for diet- this guy knew what he was talking about way before those diagnoses of ADD, etc- handle his diet, and get him to a better environment- he is giving you a big cry for help- pay attention.
best, k

I had this problem with my son for awhile, found out in my case, they had hired a girl back that used to be great and I had not thought there was a problem with her cause my son loved her before she had left. well, when she came back, she made it clear she didn't want to do potty training, but because she was last one in, she got whatever shifts the other girls didn't want. So, my son was telling her but she kept saying ok in a minute & then he would have an accident. He was just 18mths-2yrs, so he couldn't really tell me what was going on. I figured he was just getting involved & playing etc....Well, I stopped in about 40 minutes early to pick him up & they were coming in from outside & he ran straight to me & said poo, so I took him in the bathroom to find that he had already gone & it was so dried out it had to have been hours before. The pull up was so heavy, it was hanging down to his knees & all that had rubbed his inner thighs raw to point of bleeding, just a little bleeding but still! I opened that door and called that girl over & I got in her face & told her to look what she had done & I made her stand there the entire time I cleaned him, so she could hear him crying from the pain. It took every ounce in my body to not beat her to a bloody pulp!! I've never had such rage, but I controlled myself & I told her to explain to me what my 2yr old son had done to deserve such treatment? I had the owner, manager, & police notified. I took pictures and made it abundantly clear this was not going to occurt to any child ever again!! She resigned a week later and went into office work. The other girls told me later that they didn't think I was going to be able to control myself & that they had seen parents mad, but nothing like me. I told them when they have their own child, they will understand. So, hope nothing like that is going on, but I sure wish I had checked in on him more often unexpectantly.

Is this his first year of school? If so, the changes could be catching up with him and that might be making him moody. With the going in his pants that sounds like he is very into what he is doing at that moment and does not want to stop and go to the bathroom. Try talking to the teacher and see if she can tell him to go every so often. Tell-not ask ;0)-because asking opens up him saying no. Even when told they will still say no, but they just need to do it.

Him being moody could also be an age thing. I've heard from some people that when a child reaches the half point in their age (your son being 3 1/2) they tend to become more difficult. My son is weeks away from turning five. Ohmygoodness! You would think he was a teenager with the sometimes attitude. But thinking back this is how he always is before an age change. Nice to look forward to ;0).

Something in the bathroom at school might be scaring him. The loud flush or the echo. He may be developing sensory issues. Check with an occupational therapist who is well versed in SPD. He may need extra sensory input to calm down his central nervous system.