Not Invited to a Party

Uggghhh, this stuff isn't supposed to happen in kindergarten!!! That's sad. I know in our school, the teachers help by trying to encourage the parents to invite all same-sex kids to a birthday party so that others aren't excluded. Because your child is young, maybe it is an oversight by the parent. I would definitely tell the teacher to make them aware of this. Especially since your daughter is being teased. That's just mean. Unfortunately, it gets even worse by 2nd and 3rd grade.

Also, it is one of those life lessons that you teach your daughter - all life-lessons aren't always pleasant. Say something like ...."Wow, I'm sorry that you weren't invited to the party. It sounds like she could only have so many (a few friends...?) people there. That just isn't nice that they are teasing you about this. I hope that you would NEVER do that to any of the other girls in your class when you get invited and they don't." Maybe tell her of an incident that happened to you at a young age that she can relate to this story. It's hard as a parent to see this happen too. Been there, done that. It will have a positive outcome if you handle it well and nonchalently. Good luck.

I hope it worked out. My older daughter went to the circus with her friend's family but the little one wasn't included so I told her we'd have our own little party at home that night and she was so excited. She got to pick pizza for dinner and rent a movie of her choice. She was really happy to get to make all the decisions for that one night that she didn't even miss going to the circus. www.LeslieVasquez.net.

Hi Tricia,
I am so sorry for your daughter I know that she is feeling sad and left out, this has happened to my daughterr before, I would tell your daughter that maybe the girl was only able to invite small # of girls. Then on the day of the party make it a special day for your daughter maybe had a friend over that also wasn't invited and make cookies or some crafts together. This way she won't think about the party.

hope this helps
L.

This is really heartbreaking. I would want to believe it was an oversight on the part of the parents. I would speak to the principal about this- there is a rule at our school that there can be no party invitations issued without all the class / or all the girls/all the boys invited.
Does your child like the little girl who had the party? Maybe you can have her invite the girl over for a special day together. Other than that just encourage her to keep ignoring the teasing- and have the teacher be aware of what is going on too.

Hi Tricia,

My daughter is in kindergarten right now and i know what you mean.
I would suggest you taking your daughter out to do something special and fun the day of the party, so when the girls are all talking about the party the next day, your daughter will have something fun and exciting to share and not feel too left out. Maybe take her to an arts and crafts store and out to a movie...or somethinkg like that!
Hope that helps :-D

Most definitely tell the teacher! The teacher needs to explain to the little girls who are being mean that this is not acceptable. Oh, and welcome to the world of girls. It only gets harder as they get older!

that's horrible. my daughter is now in 1st grade and she had a similar incident when she was in kindergarten. just explain to her that not everyone can get invited cuz there just isn't enough money and room for it. also tell the teacher so that he/she can help with the teasing. and i agree with the other moms to do something fun on the day of the party so that she doesn't feel too bad when she goes to school and they talk about it. maybe have a little slumber party with some cousins or just the family.

My daughter is 13 now,but I still remember when she was in kindergarten.I have explained to her early on,that sometimes you are just not invited and that is ok.I believe it is ok not to be invited.They shouldn't tease and be mean about it ,I do blame the parents for not raising children to be more sensitive to each other.
I never had my children invite all the kids,even the ones they don't like, just to hurt nobody.
I just told them,be discret about it,not to obvious,give the teacher the invitations,etc.
My daughter never felt bad,when she wasn't invited.
Kids can be so mean,and as the other moms told you already, it will just get worse.
I always believed in preparation of a situation,talk about it,
and it's ok to be sad about it ,too.

I am so sorry for you and your daughter. That was truly ignorant of the parents to exclude some children. Can you explain to your daughter that sometimes parents make their children only invite a few other kids to parties. It really isn't the child's fault unless she is teasing your daughter too. I agree that you should talk to the teacher to let her know what's been going on.Maybe you could treat your daughter and a friend who wasn't at the party to a fun outing to take her mind off it.Hang in there:)