Need Advice My 20 Month Old Drags Around His Blanket and Bottle

Updated on December 31, 2009
B.L. asks from Cottage Grove, WI
12 answers

My son has always loved his bottle of milk since I can remember. He never had a Nuk (or I should I say we tried but he didn't like it very much) and after he turned one we switched over to a sippy cup during the day and he got a bottle at nap and bed time. He's very energetic and it seemed the only thing during the day that would allow him some down time would be his bottle and blanket. Now for the last month or two all he wants to do is suck on his bottle and drag around his blanket all day long! When we take it away he cries, when he realizes he doesn't have them he asks, if we say no and give him his sippy cup then he cries really hard and yells "please" which how can a mom say no to that. I don't see any harm in this, in fact I feel like it's a phase that he's going thru, so I'm reaching out to other moms to see if your kids did this. I find it really annoying because he is too old to be sucking on a bottle, however it's the only thing that makes him really happy so what is a mom to do?

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

B.,

I'd let him have the blanket, but take away the bottle. He doesn't need to carry it around all day. He'll be saying please to lots of stuff you'll need to say no to as he gets bigger :)

Jessica

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M.H.

answers from Appleton on

It seems that Catie and I are in the minority here, but it's really not that big of a deal if he keeps his bottle and blankie. I, like you, used to stress over the whole bottle issue because it's looked down upon by other mothers who's kids aren't so attached to the bottle and can get them away right at that magical age of one. But honestly, as long as you're keeping his teeth brushed and don't let him suck on it ALL day...don't stress it. He will eventually give it up on his own. My daughter had it until she was well over 2 and one day was just ready to say goodbye to it and really didn't fight me much as she got closer to 3. I know it can be embarrising because of the stigma attached to it...like you're some horrible mother cuz your kid has a bottle. So I made the rule that we did not take the bottle out in public, she had to have a big girl cup when we were out and she could only have the bottle at bedtime and nap. This helped slowly wheen my daughter, but she was EXTREMELY strong willed and her bottle was her main source of comfort. I guess you just have to pick your battles. If this is one of them, go for it and don't give in. but if it's not...I say don't sweat the small stuff. If it gives you that 3 minutes of quiet time you need and let's him cool down...enjoy the downtime for both of you!

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E.T.

answers from Rochester on

Personally I wouldn't worry about the blanket. Our daughter has 3 special blankies and there is always at least one of them within her reach. She uses them in her imaginative play as well as uses them for comfort. We do set some limits: it can go with us in the car but not into the store or restaurant because it might get lost or dirty, if it goes to daycare she has to keep it in her backpack until nap time, etc.

I can see where the bottle is more of an issue, mainly for dental reasons. Have you tried giving him the opportunity to shop for a "big boy cup"? Maybe if he has the opportunity to go to the store and choose his own sippy cup (or a cup with a straw) that will help him break the bottle habit. We are now starting to try and get our daughter away from sippy cups. It has helped that we have let her buy a few cups that she has chosen. Good luck!

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E.M.

answers from Des Moines on

i hope you dont take this the wrong way but you are the one in control of taking it away. you said you don't mind it then you said it was annoying. will he cry if you take it away yes he will but you have to deal with some of that if you dont want to deal with the bottle. i am all for parents making the decision for their own kids so i will not tell you to take it away or to let him have it. my son is 21 months he was never on the bottle but switched to sippy cup at 12 months at 16 months we went right to the cup with a lid and straw. and was told firmly that it was not to leave the kitchen it took a few months but now he knows that when he wants a drink he can just go and ask. as far as the blanket pick the battles. my son has a monkey that is suppose to stay in his room. but when i can tell he is feeling crummy i let him take monkey down stairs to play. Has your son gotten any of his molars yet? he maybe working on them and as they are painful he likes to suck.IF you do want to give up the bottle go for it full force. get some fancy sippy cups that he can pick out on his own and remove all bottles from the cupboards. My son gave up his pacifier around 16 months by my choice for his safety and it was very hard to listen to him beg for it but after a few days it was like it never existed.IF he is attached to his blankie that should be enough comfort but keep an eye out for those teeth if he hasn't gotten them yet and give him Popsicles and crackers whatever it is that he thinks feel good on his gums. My son is working on his 2nd molars right now and he has been asking for stuffed animals and Popsicles :) good luck

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H.P.

answers from Milwaukee on

I just wanted to let you know that my 5 year old daughter still carries around her blankie. In fact she has a couple. Sometimes it's annoying when she drags it all around the house but overall it is a big source of comfort for her that I would not remove. Still, we set limits when she leaves it lying around or when we are going places, it just gets in the way. I'm sure shell grow out of it but I see no reason to take it from her when it fills a need she has.

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T.M.

answers from Des Moines on

I have twins, and one son instantly gave up the bottle completely at 12 months, but the other one still needed it when he was really tired until he was about two in half. Only when he insisted, and wouldn't be distracted did I give it to him after he turned one, and shortly after he turned two he had finally weened off of it. When he had it I was holding him so he never slept with it in his mouth so it never affected his teeth. Your fine with what your doing.

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C.D.

answers from La Crosse on

If it makes him feel good and it's not hurting anyone, let him keep his blanket and his bottle. As long as you continue to practice good oral hygiene (i.e., flossing/brushing/trips to the dentist) he isn't in any danger.

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C.L.

answers from Duluth on

Yep, ditch the bottle and let him keep the blanket. He's a bit too old for the bottle. But the blanket, let him have it. My daughter is six and still has her special blanket that she's had since she was born. Yes, it's in bad shape, but she's to the point where she only sleeps with it at night. But I let her take it to daycare for naps and even to kindergarten a couple times for rest time. He'll outgrow it and it makes him feel secure. We took the bottle away at 16 months and that was that. She didn't care. Maybe you could find something to replace the attachment like a special animal or something?

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C.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

I agree with the other posters that you've got to get rid of the bottle. It's not good for his teeth or diet to be sucking on a bottle off and on all day. You could try putting water in it or have you heard about the "bottle fairy" method? Worked for us, although our son was a little older and only had the bottle at bedtime. The bottle may be a phase, but I wouldn't count on it. In my experience, sometimes the longer you wait the harder it gets. I don't understand why others have suggested limits and restrictions on the blanket though. Blankets seem like innocent comfort devices to me and my 2nd son had one. If you do decide to put restrictions on it, I wouldn't do it at the same time you limit or take away the bottle. I think that would be too much for him all at once. Just deal with one thing at a time. Good luck.

B.W.

answers from Minneapolis on

I agree with Jess, let him keep the blanket, but ditch the bottle. He's too big for it, its bad for his teeth, and he doesn't need to be drinking milk like that, especially out of a bottle.

The blanket... well my boys are 7 and 4 and both still have their special blankets. Of course they don't drag them around anymore, but they do still sleep with them adn they are only allowed out of the house for overnights.

Put rules on the blanket. ITs only allowed out of bed to the couch, but not around the rest of the house. Its not allowed in the car, not allowed in stores, etc. Its only allowed out of the house when going for an overnight, but then it has to stay in the bag until you get there.

But yeah, get rid of the bottle, he doesn't need it. He will continue to whine as long as he knows you will give in every time. But he can kee pthe blankie....

D.K.

answers from Sioux City on

I think the bigger harm is that he understands that when you say no, you don't mean it. Don't be afraid that he is capable of making a bunch of noise. The bottle really should go. He is able to drink from a sippy and it isn't good for his teeth or his diet to have a bottle all day long. I don't allow my kids to travel around the house with any drink. I don't want the mess, and sippys and bottle leak. The drink has to stay at the table. Fill his bottle with water for awhile, he will give it up. Even better, just take it away cold turkey. The whining will last about two days, and then you will be done. Think of the freedom you will have. You can leave the house without it and you won't panic each time you go someplace and leave it. Blankets are harmless. Let him have his blanket for as long as he wants. Just don't be affraid to tell that little guy "NO." It's good for them to have limits and if you don't show him that "NO" means no when he's 20 months, it won't get any easier to tell him "NO" when he's 2, 5, or 16 and their demands grow as they do.

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E.S.

answers from Madison on

I kind of agree that the bottle should go, blankie should stay. What we did with my daughter was to make sure we held her whenever she had a bottle (they can't get up and take the breast with them, why should the bottle be different?) so as a toddler the desire to get up and go was stronger than the desire for the bottle. I also agree that you shouldn't tell him anything you aren't willing to back up. He will learn that no doesn't really mean no. He is just going to be testing you more in the next couple years, not to mention when he is a teenager. :)

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