Life After a Miscarriage

I just had a miscarriage about 3 weeks ago. We were not trying and I did not know I was pregnant. This would've been baby number #3 as well. Its saddens me when I think about when I took the pregnancy test I was more scared than happy. I wasnt ready for #3, and I had recently decided to quit my job and stay at home so I had tons on my plate. When I went to the dr she couldnt find a heart-beat and even then I wasnt so upset. Yet after my dnc, I think it finally hit me and I was absolutely crushed. Not by the miscarriage, because I believe that everything happens for a reason, but my actions I couldnt help but think what did I do wrong or what could I have done differently. I'm okay now I just want number #3 now....right now, and I didnt feel that way before.

I got pregnant on a form of bc, and told me doc he said it was a fluck (sp?) that i couldnt be! I knew I was, but it was nothing like my first 2 and I felt off... I knew something wasnt right! I miscarried the weekend (2 days after telling my doc) and I held it... (sorry if thats tmi) I screamed and my husband held me all night! I didnt want another so soon, but we are glad to have any God gives us bc we were told my husband was infertile and couldnt have kids (2 kids later... lol) I knew it wasnt right from the start and I know I was about 6-8 weeks. I miscarried natural and had to have the doc do a little work...anyways I was upset about it for about 2 weeks blamed my doc for not listening and myself for ever getting on the bc... I "got over it" and felt better... unlike my SIL who miscarried last year and still morns the baby even when it was 8 weeks. I try to understand and she tries to me, but she thinks I am heartless! I know I wasnt trying but we just wanted to space the kids out bc I had a c section. I would have loved to have another baby bc we are going to try in like Jan is our finances are right, but I was hurt at first like you, but something got better. I still think of the baby from time to time, but it doesnt make me sad or cry anymore (about 4 months ago). I know things work the way they do for a reason and maybe I felt better bc I have a strong christian family and supprtive friends... I will always think about it (its also not the first one I have had...) my family has a history of them. I have had 3 and the first was the hardest bc it was right when me and my husband got engaged and then about 6 months later they told us there was something wrong with him... I cried for 2 weeks and never told anyone! I dont think this is wrong and I pray that when you do end up pregnant again its a happy healthy baby!

I miscarried my first pregnancy - in my second trimester. I was so devastated. But I did move on - I got pregnant a few months later - and have 3 beautiful children now. While I mourn that loss - I do realize that if I had carried that child to term - I wouldn't have my oldest child - and she is amazing. There are times now (15 years later - I still have moments of sadness - I know I cried a lot in Marley and Me the movie when they had a similar experience... it is part of who you are)

There is nothing wrong with not being sad - there are stages of grief - and acceptance is healthy place to be - and moving forward!

Blessings to you! I wish you luck in getting pregnant and a healty full term pregnancy.

It's ok. You have nothing to feel guilty about. Wasn't meant to be.
Some people have a little bit of that "sixth sense" sometimes, and that is what this sounds like to me...some part of you felt that this "wasn't it" yet.

I went through something similar... miscarried at 6.5 weeks, had a "not right" feeling since I had found out. Was sad at first, but got "over it" within a few weeks. I got pregnant again two weeks later (we were surprised by that) and now I'm 15 weeks. I don't think there is anything wrong with how you feel about it. The fact is that miscarriage is often a part of life, especially so early on. It's completely ok to be sad and mourn the loss, but pretty much everyone moves on at some point... some take longer than others. There is no timeline.

My SIl miscarried after 5 or 6 wks and my advice is it was a blessing in disguise-MY PHILOSOPHY IS THINGS HAPPEN FOR A REASON!!!!!!!!!!! And we may never know the reason, but we have to move on!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOVE TO YOU !!!!!!!!! L.:)

To tired to type a long answer, but have been thru the exact situation. When it doesn't feel right, you just know it's not...and a blessing that it ended the way it did (sorry). Eager to get prego again with another is a great sign. You have moved on from your loss and looking to the future :) Much Love and Prayers to you and your family for you next blessing :)

Sorry about your loss. You must have figured out right away that you were pregnant. I miscarried twice, our doctor explained to me that most women that have many children have all experienced miscarriages. Also, most women experience early miscarriages and never even knew they were pregnant. Those facts seem to make miscarriage an understandable thing, and therefore it doesn't seem like a big deal that you are ok with the loss. And try again- we didn't necessarily try again but my cycles were off and we got pregnant when we didn't think we could. Best of luck to you.

I think its okay. With my first miscarriage I was actually relived within 2 days because we hadn't been trying and my first was still so young. With my second miscarriage It was harder because we had been trying. But to be okay with knowing that something must have gone wrong and move on is fine.

I've miscarried twice and one of the first things I wondered both times was when we'd be able to try again. We were told 2 cycles. We waited 2 cycles and I now have two beautiful girls. Miscarriage sucks for sure, but I encourage you to be prepared for when your due date comes and there's no baby. That was nearly as hard for me as the initial shock that we were miscarrying.