Interruption in Daily Rutine When Hubby Stays Home

Grrr.. I don't want to be insensitive to my husband. But yes. I run a daycare and I have a routine I follow as well. It's hard for me to have yet another person hanging out in the kitchen and coming through the lower level of the house in the middle of naptime and waking everyone up because he wanted to talk with one person. Then he wants to do the treadmill at the end of the day when the kids are going home and I'm trying to keep the house organized. Or he starts long conversations with daycare parents when I'm tired and want to move on.

We just went through 3 WEEKS with him home. Shudder.

No. I can't say that I do. My husband is very considerate when gets up in the mornings. Just as I am very considerate of him when I am the first one up. He works shift work. Some days he doesn't get home from work until 11:30 pm... and he is still sleeping when I get up to get the kids ready for school. Some days (like today) he is up at 4:15 a.m. and GONE by 5:00 a.m. and I don't get up until 6:30.

He does come kiss me bye, but I like that.

I also found that you can get used to just about anything if it isn't REALLY loud. We have one of those coffee pots that grinds the beans for you before it makes the coffee. The first week we had it, I thought I would lose my mind. Now, I barely even notice it. I wake up enough to dreamsleep a thought of "oh.. the coffee is made" and then I am back asleep. :)

Sorry I had to laugh when I read this!
I go through his every Friday. My husband works out of town M- Th. We have our routine that we do every day. The kids are very good during the day with our routine. On Fridays I don't even try anymore. It messes everything up him just being there and he wants to relax ( that's fine, I understand!) but he doesn't make the kids pick up or follow what they should be doing. I only work weekend and its crazy around the house. He does everything by the seat of his pants, he doesn't disapline, he doesn't clean up after them (very well) or make them clean up. Everyone just does what ever they want, when they want. Then mom comes home and kinda saves the day. The kids see Dad and they automatically think its play time and nothing else matters... well with 5 kids ( 2 home all the time) it can't work that way! But its 6 against 1 and I loose every time. So I just wait until Monday fix everything that needs to be cleaned and caught up on. And Monday morning when the two little ones wake up and ask where Daddy is I tell them working and they switch back over to "mommy" mode with thier day and attitudes. Wish I could give you some advice, instead of belly aching to ya, but I have none! Just do the best you can with him there. With him being home and waking you up early.. I would explain to him how you feel its rude and fusterating. If he doesn't change... start doing the same to him. I know with my hubby he doesnt get talking to him... but actions speak alot louder with words! :) Good luck (thanks for letting me gripe, as my day has begun its craziness lol)

Haha, yup! My hubby takes off about 3 weeks when I have a baby, and while I appreciate the gesture and his help, many times I am waiting for him to go back to work. Simply because we have a routine here, the kids are great with the routine, but when it is constantly interrupted, things go awry!

Yes, my husband can be really noisy in the mornings if he gets up before me (which is rare.) I honestly don't think he realizes how loud he is. I get up and quietly leave the room closing the door behind me, he gets up, turns on lights, leaves the bedroom door wide open so I can hear everything, etc. If he stays home my daily routine is thrown off. It just changes the flow and I feel like I'm not nearly as productive. All I know is that when he retires (and in this economy we're probably both going to be 90!) I'm buying him a really nice set of golf clubs! ; )

Me and hub are very conscious of the light thing and do not turn it on while the other is in bed unless we "feel" it's time for the other to get the heck up, and even then we do warn first so you have the chance to put your pillow over your head if need be.
I remember when I was a sahm and if dad was off or home sick it definitely changes your entire day. Don't resent it tho, it's just one day out of your normal routine. Try to embrace it and make him feel special that he got to spend the day with you :)

why would he turn on the bedroom light while you're sleeping? This sounds very inconsiderate to me. My husband puts his clothes in our master bath at night so he can just turn the light on in there.

It does throw my routine off when he stays home, we both work but he leaves at 5:30 and I leave at 7:15. I dont hear his alarm anymore, and most days I sleep through him kissing me goodbye. If he stays home, it does throw me off because he's a light sleeper and I'm afraid of waking him up.

When hubby is home it does through off our routine, we just try to adjust best we can and enjoy having him there.

In regards to getting ready, hubby is very considerate in that manner and would never make those type of disturbances, let alone turn on the light. Maybe try talking to him and let him know that when he is getting ready it is keeping you awake therefore leaving you tired and short on patience for your day. Help him with a way to do his morning routine with out so much disturbance. For example have his clothes he needs placed in another room/bathroom thae night before so he doesn't need your bedroom light on.

Yes it does cause a stir in the daily routine, but my hubby isn't home on sick day or vacation days or just because it usually occurs when there is no loads to deliver or comes home early because his deliveries are done on Monday we had snow so bad the boss wasn't able to drive into work since she lives else where & commutes so as he went on his morning to go to work he was home 45 min. later that day he did help with the kids he even took them sleding they enjoyed it so much they love it when dad is home on a day he should of been at work.
As disturbing as hubbies can be getting ready for the days work don't you think that it disturbs them that we get to stay in & sleep a little while longer lounge in jammies do what we want with the kids or just go shopping.
I read that he is an emotional person that this will upset him if you tell him to be quiet while he is getting ready for work I hate the alarm going off he never hears it unless I nudge him then it keeps going off it it continues i'll tell him to turn it off usually when I have been up with a child who was sick restless had a bad dream & crying in their sleep I get so annoyed that he can sleep past this most of the time & not realize I have been up just last night I woke up at 3 he was snoring I wanted to put a pillow over him to muffle the sound but instead got up took my bedding down stairs & tried to fall asleep on the couch this morning I just let him make sure our son was up ready for school I heard my daughter say shhh mommy is sleeping on the couch why is she there then hubby relpies I don't know why she is there.HMMMM really you can't figure that I can't sleep through yor snooring.I set out his clothes the night before it's the same thing so all he needs to do is get up get dressed & do what he needs to in the bathroom downstairs if he turns the light on it isn't the bedroom light it is the hall way light on for a brief moment.Are you only walking on eggshells in the morning while he is getting ready for work & that is disturbing or is this all teh time while he is home & trying to approach any matter he feels insulted & breaks down maybe ther is more issues than he has told you about his ex wife

My hubby works 8 days on 6 days off which means he is off every other week. It was a big adjustment for our family and continues to be. On his week on he is sleeping all day so when he is home he does't know how our routine works. He doesn't have any patience when it comes to our youngest so I am constantly reminding him how I do things in his absense. You need to sit down with your hubby and tell him what bothers you and to be more considerate. Hopefully he will make some adjustment to his behavior.

Sounds like my hubby. I go to bed later then he does and it only takes a few times of going in and turning on the light and making noise for him to realize that being woken up isn't so fun. Getting something with white noise might help you shut out some of the sounds and a little light that isn't bright might help with not having to deal with the bright lights.

My husband (married 28 years) was never made to do anything he didn't want to just by pouting. He was complaining about one of our granddaughters who is like that and I said "well, that is how you are. You pout to get your own way and if that doesn't work, you are cranky and impossible. I blame it on your parents for not making you go to and do family things just because you pouted and it made it easier on them not to make you" When he gets emotional he is doing so to win the argument and to keep you from complaining and it is working. Stop letting it work! Tell him and ignore his emotional tantrum.

I personally don't. But my Mom does. My Dad is notorious for being loud when he wakes up. There is a floor furnace in the hallway. He always has to step on it and it squeaks loudly. He paces the floor and his houseshoes swishes across the floor. He makes coffee, pops the bathroom door lock, turns on the TV. Granted, this is a very small two bedroom house they live in. I have had to endure all of this for 20 years until I got married. I once told him to be quiet I was trying to sleep... LOL! Which hurt his feelings because I am sure in my sleep-enuced stupor, I was rather ugly about it (whoops). To this day, he still does it. My Mom just endures it and gets on up. It's actually kind of comical these days to think he still does it and it still aggrivates my Mom just as much ;)

I would find a quiet moment to talk to him. Pick the things that bug you the MOST and work on those. For example, if turning the light on really interrupts your morning, ask him to use a different light (maybe a nightlight). That seems like a no-brainer to me. My DH will use just the residual light from the bathroom in the morning, or open a curtain a bit. But I'm also a heavier sleeper than you might be. I even sleep through his alarm, but will wake up to my own or my daughter's voice.

I don't know if he's the type to be oblivious, but maybe you have to point out that your routine is to be up at x time and if he's going to be up before that, could he please be quiet? Or if he wakes the kids, HE can deal with them? He can get up whenever, but if he's going to be home, could he be mindful of x or y? I try to be mindful of who is home. I don't keep our toddler silent when her older sibs are sleeping in, but I do keep the noise down til after 10. In return, I ask them to be mindful of her when she's napping.

On your end, if a white noise machine or even earplugs would help, consider investing in them on days you know the schedule will be different.

I totally relate. It drove me nuts to have him here saying oh don't mind me, do your thing--- I can't when the kids are coming to him every 2 minutes wanting to play and he wants to SLEEP! must be nice.... lol Anyways, when he was laid off, it was definitely an adjustment! We had a hard time getting everyone back on the schedule since he just hung around while I did all my normal things with the kids!

My husband works in the evening and he is home one night a week with us... tuesday. I love seeing him but it is a nightmare. He wants dinner much later than we usually have it, messes up bath time, reads too many stories etc. By the time we are done my DD is in bed an hour late after having a complete melt down and then I have a screaming baby too and a hyper 5 yr old. So funny. I am always saying "stop messing up our routine". But it is the only night we can all sit down and eat together. lol They all do it.

Sorry, I don't have any advice. I just want to let you know that yes, having hubby home messes up the routine alot of times. I learned to go with the flow and try to enjoy the day(s) he's home. Just be thankful it's just him! We moved in with my inlaws for "a couple months." That was almost a year ago. We now have no routine. Alas, it is another day....

Do the exact same thing to him when he is trying to sleep - so how he likes it!!!