I Need Serious Advise on a Sleep Issue with My 4 Month Old Son

Hi K., First of all, I am glad you stopped the co-sleep, I never undersdtood this, no wonder husbands feel left out once the baby is born, the marriage bed in my opinion should never be used except for husband and wife, have ing a child in the bed must really put a damper on intamacy and romance. I don't not think your baby is under fed, also you need to understand that your baby did not revert back to new born cycle, a baby can not do anything that you do not allow them to do. You created a bad habit/pattern with your son by getting up putting the pacifire in his mouth, feeding him, so of course he is going to wake up, it's like a built in alarm clock for him right now. I am 51 years old I have raised 3 kids, and unless my babies were sick or not feeling well I did not get up with them through the night, I had a 10 gallon aquarrium in there room, and it had a blue light, so I was able to peek in on them each time I or my husband got up to go to the bathroom we always looked in on our kids, now my daughter is 19 and I still look in on her when i get up to go to the bathroom. But here is the hard part, and I have probably given this advice to any where from 50 to 70 new moms STOP GETTING UP WITH THEM ALL THROUGH THE NIGHT thy are not going to starve if you wait and feed them in the morning, there were times when I would go in my babies room and sit in the rocking chair but never got them up until morning, I was a stay at home mom, but I still didn't want to create bad habits for them, as babies grow their eating and sleeping patterns do change, and as that is hapening it is our job to make sure that good habits are being formed. I understand the crying out method, which I have never heard of til reading about it in the mamasource e-mails, no mom can stand to hear their baby cry, but if you stop getting him up eventually they crying will stop and better habits will be being formed. What good are you to your son and your husband if you are up all through the night, then go to work the next, just to come home to do the same thing all over again that night. Hope this helps, if you would like to talk furthur, send me a message or e-mail me at ____@____.com I was one of the moms who could not stand to hear my babies cry, so I do understand. J.

Oh my goodness. Don't you wish they came with specific instructions? You mentioned that you are trying ceral ... maybe jump on that and try him with cereal every night in addition to the bottle to hold him over more. My daughter was a huge spitter, but adding the cereal helped hold her and lessoned the spitting a bit so she could have more formula.

Hopefully it is a phase where he is growing and needing some cereal and maybe after a few days it will pass. Unfortunately, you have to survive those days. Try the cereal and see how it works. But ... don't forget that if he has any trouble pooping or doesn't go very often, oatmeal would be the better choice as it is not binding like rice. Good luck. I hope it helps.
k

maybe try rice cereal before bed. it does take them a while before they dont push it out with their tongues. also try some in his formula to thicken it up. he could also be going through a growth spurt and that alone can mess a babies schedual up badly (i know it did for my daughter about that age). i dont think your doing anything wrong at all. good luck!

You are doing right what you are doing, however, you can try to soothe your baby by giving him babies magic tea. It did great work for my baby and I always prefer the same due to it's organic ingredients.

Hi K.:
Woww 8:30pm to 3:30am? Thats seven hours without food or a diaper change. I don't think I know any grown adults that can handle that. lol Your baby is growing and 7 ozs. may hold him for that long,but unless he has a bladder the size of Texas,he is going to wet himself more than a few times during the night.When you stick the pacifier back in his mouth,it helps him slip back to sleep,forgetting he is wet and uncomfortable.If he keeps waking after that,he needs to be changed.That pacifier is only going to take his mind off the diaper for so long.Thats why he keeps waking. I'd suggest changing him in a dim room and then soothe him back to sleep,or then give him his pacifier.I think,you know, that while he likes his crib,he also felt safer,when he was sleeping with you.It will take some time for him to adapt to the change from waking and feeling your presence. He will soon be old enough to properly digest cerial.That will help him sleep longer hours for you.Crying it out,won't provide a more restful night for you or him,Regardless of what some believe, all that will do is make your baby feel abandoned.They cry for a reason.Your baby doesn't know what spoiled means,he is communicating,the only way he knows how right now.I guess the question should be,Would you turn your back,and ignore him if he could speak,and ask you to hold him? I've been a mother for 38 years and a Grandmother for 15 years. I realize this doesn't make me an expert,merely experienced. I wish you and your baby boy the very best.

You've gotten some good advice, but I just wanted to add another suggestion. You may want to try cutting out the pacifier now. After 3 months of age, it can develop into a habit of him needing it to help him fall asleep. If he wakes up and it's not in his mouth, he'll cry because he doesn't know how to sleep without it. It may take a couple of weeks (hopefully less), but eventually he'll get used to not having it. I waited until my son was 9 months old and wished I had held my ground and stopped earlier. Once he learned how to fall asleep on his own, I didn't have to keep going back in there to pop the pacifier back in his mouth. Another good thing about not having the pacifier is once he learns how to fall asleep on his own, it will help you to better understand his needs when he cries and to know if something else is going on (teething, growth spurt, diaper change, sick, etc.). In the transition of getting rid of the pacifier, you'll probably have to do some extra soothing. He is a little young, but if you notice that he has any type of comfort object (a tiny blanket or something), try giving him that instead. Or try developing one (which can take weeks of constantly giving him the object). Target sells these mini blankets that are specifically for that and are supposedly SIDS safe. Good luck!

I just got done with the same thing. My DD is 41/2, She has always been a good slepper but when she hit 4months she was up at least two times a night and would not take naps or go to bes without me putting her to slepp. It was about two weeks with this and now she is back to normal. I go on a nother site called babycenter.com and I love it. We did cereal but it did not work foe us. Every one I talked to about this they saidjust about every baby does it and it is about a two week time period. Good luck

Hi K.,

I am sorry to hear about the struggles, it's so hard with babies.. from my experience with my daughter, I was doing 4-6oz every 2.5 hours or so. She was a good eater.. I gave her rice cereal as well at 3 months and this really helped her sleep at night. She was full and happy. Sometimes it's just a matter of time while they transition.. make sure the milk is ok for him.. and check his gums as well.. it might be teething time.. some babies have swollen gums early on.. stages or teething and will not be able to thrust to well either. Hope this helps a little.

Hi K.,
first of all your not doing anything wrong. my son(now 7yrs) was not a sleeper and my daughter (almost 7 months) is. remember, all kids are different. i think that around 4 months my daughter was learning to sooth herself. she wasnt sleeping with us, but in order for her to sleep through the night we had her in her own bed, but in our room. i dont think that they have developed their memory yet, so when we are out of their sights, we are out of mind. and being so little and dependent, this is probably a little scary for them. around 5 1/2 months i started having her nap in her crib to get used to waking up by herself. we did this for about two weeks, then one night i decided to put her to sleep in her crib. she has slept there ever since.

if you are thinking he is not getting enough before bed, try to put a scoop or 2 of his cereal in with his formula. you may have to make one of the nipples bigger, but if he's teething and having a hard time grasping eating from a spoon, this might help. i think it took my daughter about a month and a half to grasp the whole eating thing.

also, at this age i think the pacifier helps them learn to sooth themselves. my daughter isnt much of a pacifier person unless she wants to fall asleep and she cant. she doesnt use it all the time but she likes knowing its there if she wants it. oh also having a favorite blanket helps too. when she's tired and she reaches for it, she'll fall asleep right away. it all depends on her mood...hahaha they have their days just like us ;D
hope this helps...good luck to you :D