My daughter started off potty training so well. Now she poops in her panties. Even when I stay hot on her trail reminding her to poop in potty. And also putting her potty close by so it's easy access. She used to poop in pot all the time and she just quit. I have tried everything. From making her stay inside until the deed is done. To making her clean up her mess. Help Im at my wits end
Just put her in pull ups until she's older.
This is something she can control - and you can't - and she's rebelling.
Put her in a pullup and ignore it as much as possible.
Change her quietly - very little interaction.
She's getting attention from the power struggle - ignoring it takes the 'fun' out of it for her.
Your wit's end is not her wit's end. Making her stay inside until the deed is done? You're just asking for non-compliance.
What you're engaging in is a battle of wills. Little kids control so little of their lives - eating and toileting are pretty much it. And control that she WILL, if you don't stop fighting with her about it.
Go talk to the ped about it. There could be an actual physical reason for it. Even if there isn't, your method is destructive to your purpose and the ped can help you with that.
As Doris Day said, you can't make her poop in the potty. The more you try, the more obstinate the child becomes. I'd back off. I'd put her in a diaper and calmly tell her she'll have to wear a diaper so her clothes stay clean until she's able to poop in the potty. Be matter of fact and non-judgemental. Tell her she has a choice. Be sure to give her choices whenever possible in the rest of her life. Try giving her a hug and warmly tell her you know she can figure this out. You're there to help her. Increase giving her positive attention. Decrease negative attention, especially about potty issues.
I would be concerned about why this has happened. Has anything in her life changed? What is her mood like? What is the texture of her feces? Has that changed? We usually poop close to the same time everyday. Has her frequency and time of day changed?
You could watch to see her pattern and take her to the potty on a flexible schedule. You could try using the same way you trained her. Spend time having fun with her. Make using the potty fun. Perhaps it's time for her to use the big potty. Play up how using the big potty is for big girls.
I suggest that if you can't think of why she's changed and manage that and/or if anything else about her poop has changed you take her to the pediatrician. There could be something physically wrong.
An added thought. How long had she been using the potty? Sometimes a kid is not consistent in the way they poop. Is it possible she had an accident (s) and you were upset so now it is a power struggle.
Kids regress all the time. The novelty of using a fun new potty wears off quickly, and they get sick of doing it all the time. Kind of like the first few days of preschool that are fun and exciting, and then the reality kicks in and the kid says, "Wait, you mean I have to do this every day?"
Put her back in diapers or pull ups and wait it out. She will not go to kindergarten in diapers, I promise you.
Making a 3 year old clean up a mess she may not be capable of preventing is just asking for trouble and way more frustration. And way more mess. This is becoming a battle of wills, and I'm sorry Mom, but you will lose this because the child has the ultimate decision on when she is old enough or developmentally ready to use a potty. You don't make her stay inside until her molars come in or her hair grows longer, so don't make her stay in to use the potty. Let things develop more naturally.
I found my little ones weren't interested in using the potty - in that they never got excited about it past the initial trying it out because it was new. After that, I had to just make sure it was near to them (same as you), and I had them in easy to pull down pants or just their undies if it was warm enough. And I just praised them, but not overboard, when they went. But if they didn't make it - I never chastised them for it. Opposite. That's the one thing you are definitely not supposed to do. No matter how gross it is for you to clean up or how tired you are of it all.
If you make potty training into a negative - for you and for her - it's just going to be something she avoids. You are associating mommy being grumpy, her getting punished, her having to clean up poop - with using the potty.
Make it pleasant again. Back off. No pressure. Go back to having the only thing you associate with potty is praise. I'd take a break for now.
Making her clean her own mess seems a bit harsh.
It's common for kids to regress with potty training. I'd be patient and reintroduce the idea later. I've done this with my kids and eventually they catch on. I'd say this type of thing is best done with maximum patience.
if you were hot on my trail, i'd be resistant to poop too.
she's only 3. back off and stop harping on her.
khairete
S.
The solution is to chill out and stop stressing yourself and her. Nothing you said is abnormal for a 3 year old. Push less, stop punishing, and don't make a federal case out of it. Calmly deal with messes/accidents; a toddler shouldn't handle body waste cleanup.
Set a cheerful example. Announce when you're going to use the potty, and go. Don't drag her in with you, but let her follow if she wants. When she uses it again, show you're proud.
sticker charts with a toy reward for going on the pot. encouragement and patience. a trip to the pedi to make sure theres noting medically going on that is causing her to not want to poo on the pot might help too.
How old is she? 3? Then she's supposed to have accidents and not make it all the time. When she's 4 or 5 she should be over this. I'd put a pull up on her and let her continue working on it.
Last Halloween I took my sons candy to bribe him to go poop on the potty. If he went, he got candy. It worked right away but he may have just been ready to use the toilet.
He started to poop on the toilet before peeing when he was 2 and then stopped completely. I believe kids wake up one day and it just clicks and they are ready to be out of diapers.
Make sure she isn't constipated, which is common. Have her drink plenty of water. Lighten up because pressuring her is only going to make her fight you on this. There are books on the subject like Everyone Poops that she might enjoy and show it's normal for her.
