Help! Mommies Who Has an 9 Month Old

N.,

Every baby is different and there are no rules just guidelines of what many babies tend to do around a certain age. My daughter did not start sleeping through the night until about 12 months which was also when she stopped requiring a nighttime feeding (even my pediatrician suggested that she should not get any more milk at night past 9 months and to let her cry it out). I am not a fan of the cry it out method and so just went by her cues...

Also, 9-10 pm is very late for a baby that young to be going to bed. What is her nap schedule? I assume she is taking at least 2 maybe 3 naps a day. The last nap should not be any later than 4pm if you want her to go down anytime before 8.

Hang in there - she will start sleeping longer eventually.

--I second the mom below who noted that 9:00 was way too late... tired babies bodies' begin to produce stress chemicals that make it harder for them to sleep. Try 7:00. Look for yawning, rubbing eyes, that is about the right time. If the little one is cranky, she has been up too long.

--And... don't worry about the eating. It sounds fine to me. Let her stop eating when she wants to. This is really important. My husband's parents told me that they consistently "fed him until he was full, and then one third more." Today my husband is pushing 300 pounds. He has had a weight problem his whole adult life. He exercises vigorously, but he eats and eats... his appetite has no off switch. He was taught as a baby to disregard his body's signals about when he was full, and now he's still doing it. Disaster.

Sounds like she is going to bed way too late and is waking because she is overtired. I would move her bedtime up to 7-730 and feed her earlier. Healthy sleep habits book really helped me understand their sleep schedules.

Hi,
I have an 18 month old who JUST started sleeping straight through the night. my I suggest putting into place RIGHT now a sleep program...I went online and found a really great one...Sleep Sense by Dana Obelman...if you want a copy of it I have one in my files...and will email it to you FREE...I have shared it with tons of my friends. my daughter now goes to sleep at 7pm and sleeps till 7am. however in the early days...5 months and up we implemented this program and STUCK to it. Today it has paid off! with the food thing well...just wait. all children are different...one will feed hourly one will feed just like the books say! we are all individuals! ain't life grand! ? so contact me directly through mamasource and I will hook you up with that file on the program...it's literally a lifesaver! 12 hours sleep now just rocks my world! I feel your pain! keep up the GREAT work! you are doing everything you can! ps. my first child is now 17 and of course he slept through the night at 3 weeks! ha!

She is a baby...she is NOT necessarily supposed to sleep all night. Every baby is different and there is no hard and fast rule about how they sleep. I know I wake up during the night at times, why shouldn't a baby?

I have a 7 month old (totally breastfed, which can change things) and he wakes up 2-3 times a night...I expect this, as it is normal. They are tiny little beings, they cannot just put themselves back to sleep...they want comfort from their mom, the person who carried them around for nine months..

Just try to relax and realize it will pass. Frankly, while it can be tiring, I enjoy these quiet moments at night with my son. He is only young once and it makes me happy to give him what he needs, whether nourishment or just comfort.

A couple things: First, not all kids sleep through the night that early. I know we seem to think it's normal, but it's really not. Also, it sounds like you're putting he down WAAAY too late. If they go to sleep very tired, it's harder for them to stay asleep. not sure why, I think it has something to do with brain chemistry. Anyways, my 1 yr old gets dinner at 6, bath by 6:30, snuggle/book/calm play around 7, and is usually asleep by 7:30. He still wakes to nurse, but I mainly blame co-sleeping and habit for that. He stays asleep until 7-8 in the morning. However, if something else is going on and he doesn't get to sleep until closer to 9, his sleep is much more broken, and he's usually up closer to 6. I used to try the 9-10 pm thing because I thought he'd sleep later in the morning, then I read several books telling me why I was wrong, and it's really true. Try moving up her bedtime.

Your baby is going to bed far too late , she needs to be going to bed by 7.30 at the latest so her evening meal she would need to be given around 5pm , bath her around 6.30/6.45 ready for bedtime , also at 9 months baby foods may not be enough for her , try giving her things that she can pick up and feed herself with , pasta , carrots , broccoli , potatoes. You need to change her routine and stick to it , babies love a routine & they are happier for it.

I have 3 kids & they have all had the same bath/bedtime routine from a very young age & they were all sleeping through the night by 4 months old(my youngest is 14 weeks and has just started going through).

Good luck.

My son didn't sleep through the night until he was 13 months old. I don't think it has anything to do with food, because he ate lots...
I would suggest the book: Healthy Sleep Habits- Happy Child and I would try to put her down earlier. 9PM is super late for a baby, or am I old fashioned?

I am experiencing the same problem with my 9mo old son. He would wake up every two hours and i became very sleep deprived. He now sleeps about 3-4 nights a week. We ended up putting a radio in his room which we turn on at night for him to listen to. It has worked well so far. I was desperate for help and information I found on the internet said some kids do not sleep through the night until 2yrs old. I don't know if i can make it that long!

My daughter was a horrible sleeper and we tried everything. She would wake almost every hour or two. At about 5/6 mos she rolled on her tummy to sleep and has been a good sleeper ever since. She would still wake at least once a night for a bottle until about 12 mos and sometimes twice a night but for us that was way better than the 5/6/7 times a night. But she definitely tossed and turned and woke up a lot before we put her on her tummy. Her pediatrician said it was ok as long as she could roll over. I'm a tummy sleeper too so it looks like she takes after mommy!

Hi N.- there could be a few things going on here. First- at 9 months she's probably teething, which can wreak havoc on every part of her day (eating, mood, sleeping). Have you checked her teeth? SHe isn't eating very much- that is a cause for concern- check with her pediatrician about her weight gain. if she is "thriving" (gaining the correct amount of weight at the right times) she's probably fine and just doesn't need as much food. Are you formula feeding her? maybe she doesn't like the formula? Maybe try some juice or water to get some other fluids in her system. She is also probably ready for table foods, and might be bored with jar foods. my daughter stopped eating jar foods (would totally refuse the cereal too) at about 9 months. try pasta, well-steamed veggies, applesauce, etc.
Another thing is her schedule- 7/7:30 is pretty late for a 9 month old - can you feed her dinner and start her bedtime routine earlier? She still needs about 12-14 hours of sleep each night, and going to bed between 9 and 10 is way, way too late for her. If she is overtired, she will continue to wake up. At her age she has got to learn to sleep through the night on her own, but an overtired baby cannot do that. Unlike adults, babies need to be taught to go to sleep when they are tired, so it's your job to recognize tired signs (fussiness, crankiness, hyperactivity, rubbing eyes or pulling ears, yawning) and get her to bed asap. When my daughter was 9 months, she ate dinner at 5, bath at 5:30, bed by 6:30pm, and she sleeps until 6 or 7am without waking up.(i started this schedule when she was 6 months, it took about a week for her to adjust to it) A 9 month old should also have two naps a day for about an hour/two hours each. Good luck! And def check with her doctor about her food intake, but it could be as simple as teething and being too tired to eat.

Try introducing her to table food...oatmeal, mashed potatoes, chicken...applesauce. See if that helps. Good Luck.

My daughter was 12 months before she stopped getting up 2-3 times a night. It's a waiting game...I know how you feel. nothing you can do will change the way she stays asleep, sorry!

Hi N.,

I'm not sure that I can offer you any advice, but I can offer you my sympathy. My son is now 20 months old, and is basically sleeping through the night, but he occassionally still wakes up for milk especially if he hasn't had a lot to eat during the day. When he was 9 months old, he was still nursing at least one time during the night and would nurse for a very long time in the morning. I had it easier in the sense that we were co-sleeping with him (and still do), so it was easy for me to roll over to take care of him and then go back to sleep. I don't think there was anything I could do to change his drinking habits at that time, and I don't think that you are doing anything wrong right now. It sounds like your little girl just needs more feedings than the average baby. Maybe she's looking for more time with you too. Could this be an attempt at spending more time with mommy? I know that it may seem like this is going to last forever, but as I'm sure you know, it all changes rather quickly when you look back on it.

Good luck and I wish you well,

V.

Is your baby napping during the day on a regular basis? At least 2 naps a day during the day will help with sleep. I, too, have a 9 month old that does not sleep through the night. The doctor told me that she is now in the age of separation anxiety and that if she wakes during the night, it is because she is alone and wants someone near. I'm still nursing, so she still wants a "snack" in there as well. You should probably contact your doctor about her eating issues, if you feel she is not getting enough food. A lot of babies do not like rice cereal or oatmeal. At 9 months, if your baby has been "pinching" items like cheerios and is able to get them to her mouth, then she is ready for table food and you can back off the baby food. It maybe your baby would rather feed herself. Try cereals, green peas, cooked carrots, corn, and little pieces of other foods. You may be surprised to find that she will do a better job with eating when she's in control of putting the food in her mouth. Also, you can give her water from a sippy cup at this age. I usually do water with meals, but I nurse either just before or just after solid meals, so you should maybe try a bottle before or after a solid meal. Again, I think your doctor would have the best suggestions where food is concerned. Good Luck and my son started sleeping through the night at 10 months, so it could be that a full night of sleep is just around the corner! Hang in there! And remember that you need to take care of yourself, so when you can get a chance for some pampering, please take the opportunity and enjoy it! Happy mommies make for happy babies!

I would try giving her a bit more formula in her bottle when making it. OR make oatmeal or rice nad use the water from one of those in making her bottle, and give her some rice creal to go with, fresh air is always good after a warm bath some qualitry time, it ALL together for a good night sleep!!

My 3 boys are older now but 2 of the 3 woke in the night until they were 2 years old. They also startled easily and were difficult to move without waking. What matters is that you are getting as much rest as possible. Many babies do not eat a lot of solids until they are older. You can tell if she is ready by watching for swallowing. If she is spitting out most of the food or thrusting her tongue out of her mouth or gagging, she might not be ready for solids. Food should be fun and for trying new things. Formula will provide what she needs.

My boys needed a lot of human contact. For us, letting them sleep with us worked well. They woke up, I nursed but you could give a bottle, and then went back to sleep. As they got older, they would just reach out to make sure I was there and then go back to sleep without eating.

Hang in there! Now that they are so much older, I miss them as cuddly little babies. And I still get up at night to tell the teenagers to turn off the lights and music and go to sleep.

I have been having the same problem with my 9 month old. At five months she just stopped sleeping the night. Doc said that she is just an active child that does not want to miss anything. THAT did NOT help me at all. We tried "cry it out," from Ferber, to teach her how to fall asleep in her crib. All it taught her was to be afraid of her crib. We did "pick up, put down" from the Baby Whisperer. It worked for a while but my husband and I just did not have the energy to continue it. It IS a great book and it will help you with this new little one. But she still was not sleeping, she was not even napping.

The Problem: not enough sleep is sleep deprived. With a full house, your daughter might not be getting enough naps during the day. So, when she wakes up crying, she is actually just asking "Mommy, please help me get back to sleep, I am so tired!" The fact that she falls asleep when she has a bottle does not mean that she is hungry, (I have the exact problem but I breastfeed), the act of sucking the bottle is a rhythmic motion that gives her a focus that allows her to fall asleep. Kind of like turning out the lights and lighting a candle to focus on for us.

I just purchased a book "The 90 Minute Sleep Program" http://www.pollymoore.com/ It seems to be the only sleep book on the market that is geared for the first YEAR (not just the first months) of a child's life. It is written by a neurologist who specializes in sleep!!! I am almost through with the book, and yesterday was the first day I actually followed the program. It is 7:10 and she is STILL ASLEEP. Yes, she did wake up 3x once I fed her but the other two times, I just patted her back till she fell back asleep. The website alone has good advice and will give you the basics, but this quick read book is giving me great advice.

Good luck and NAP NAP NAP.

Hi, N.. Not sure if anyone has brought this up, but have you considered that she may be teething? Feel her gums. This could also explain her not wanting to eat. Another thing to consider is she may not like the baby food. Have you considered giving her some table food? If she can eat more, she will sleep more. Also, keep her busy during the day, and take one of her naps away, especially if it's the one closest to dinnertime. Maybe acid reflux also. I have 5 kids, and they have all been different. You just have to think of everything! Hope that helps! M.

We all develop sleep patterns. We are creatures of habit. If your daughter is in the habit of waking at night, she will need to break that habit. This may take time. Try not to reward her waking up times. Give her a love pat and tuck her back in. Continually tell her this is sleep time. I would allow her to fuss it out by herself if she is not a screamer. Good luck! AF

I'd try putting her to bed earlier. Around 7 - at the latest. You have to have a schedule that works for your family but getting her to bed earlier mey make her sleep longer. As for the food try some different things. She may definitely ready for some table food by now. My 9 month old LOVES pasta.

All children are different. Several of mine did not sleep through the night until after they were 1. Is she really hungry when she wakes up or is she waking up out of habit. You could try feeding her once more before bed, since dinner was an hour and a half or more before she goes to bed. You could also replace one bottle during the night with water if she isn't really hungry. But you also said that she doesn't eat large amounts, so she may just have a small stomach and need to eat more often. If that is the case, I would suggest talking to your doctor about it. Good luck.

Hi there!
As a mom of five, a nine month old who doesn't eat that much and wakes up twice in the night is a perfectly typical nine month old baby. Have you ever tasted rice cereal? My kids have never eaten it. Nothing to worry about. Putting her to bed so late could be exacerbating the problem, however. Overly tired kids tend to sleep less than others. Just a thought.

Good luck!

I don't really have any good advice for you except that it will eventually pass. Unfortunately you can't make her eat more than she wants to, but maybe you can try to feed her a little more food before you put her into bed so she hits the sack with a full tummy. My son didn't sleep through the night until he was almost two years old. This will probably sound bad to a lot of people but he woke up in the middle of the night, every night, for a bottle of milk. I know it was just sort of a comfort thing and maybe thats what it is for your daughter. You could try to get her back to sleep without feeding so she gets out of the habit, but most peeople will probably say if she is hungry then to feed her a bottle. I know its hard because when you constantly wake up during the night, you feel like you didn't get any sleep. I am still there.

Hey there! I am sorry your little one his having sleep issues. My only advice is to go get the book Secrets of the Baby Whisperer. It helped me set things in my house up when my now 3 year old was born. She has some great practical advice. Both my daugher (now 3) and son (4 months) slept through the night by the time they were 6 weeks. Emma was younger and Cole slept through the night right at 6 weeks old. Before that he only woke up once at night to eat and go right back to bed.

Here is a link to the book. I was looking at the reviews and one person claims that she is against breastfeeding. That is not the case, she advices moms to choose what works best for them and their family. and not to be h*** o* yourself if you cannot breastfeed. She even says several time breastmilk is best, and that some is better than none, ect.

http://search.barnesandnoble.com/Secrets-of-the-Baby-Whis...

Good Luck!

S.

Have you ever had concerns about her stomach functions? Have your Dr check things like kidney function or intestinal blockage. Does her tummy appear to be "swollen" (even a little)? This could be a sign that an organ is swollen (like the kidney, or spleen) and the swelling is pushing the tummy- making your daughter think she is full and not being able to hold any more food.
I say this because our daughter, who is wonderfully healthy now,was the same way and our pediatrician always told me she was fine- her tummy just "looks that way".
Turned out- I took her to another Dr- he said her spleen and kidney were swollen so much that there was no room for her stomach cavity. She had been born with a blockage in her kidney and for 4 yrs we were told she was "just petite" and her tummy just "looks that way".
Well, she had her non-functioning kidney removed in Feb. and is growing like a sunflower!
Main Point: Mama, if you think your baby is having trouble and your Dr says you're wrong; then take that child to another Dr. (and another if you have to). Don't wait 4 yrs until they start getting every virus and every little germ going around.

Take good care,
T.