For Moms with Little Girls at What Age Do You...

Updated on June 09, 2011
B.C. asks from Valley Cottage, NY
36 answers

This past weekend I hosted a sleep over with a set of 7yr old twins and my two daughters ages 4 and 7. Both of the twins each had these little sports bra's. They have not developed yet but it did get me to wonder at what age would I start asking my daughter to wear a training bra or sports bra? The twins also had under-arm deodorant and they applied it before bed time and in the morning before they got dressed. It got me wondering and I wanted to hear from you at what age do you think little girls should start wearing deodorant?

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So What Happened?

Thank you all for your valuable input, I thought 7 was way too young but I figured let me get your thoughts. I will wait until there is a need for deodorant which right now thankfully there is none. The sports bra I will wait until September to speak to her and see how she feels. There is really no development at all so no need to rush, I want to keep my little girl for as long as I can.

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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

I didn't start this stuff until I saw signs of them needing it or right before. My daughter was 9 when I saw she needed to start wearing a bra. I started her right before it was a "need."

2 moms found this helpful

M..

answers from St. Louis on

When they start stinking. This worries me, I have a 6 year old. Im not ready for all of this! I do have to layer her tank tops though, not so much ready for a sports bra, hoping we wont be for a long time!

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M.B.

answers from New York on

I think girls should start wearing a training bra when they start to develop. It's not even necessary then, but it's practice, and might provide some modesty under some shirts.

Deodorant should be used when it's NEEDED. Also, you might want to think about using just deodorant without antiperspirant. There are potential health concerns about antiperspirant. Many of them contain aluminum and some other chemicals that aren't good for anyone, much less little children.

1 mom found this helpful

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L.B.

answers from San Francisco on

Okay, I don't have a "little" girl anymore, she's 13 now. But I started having her wear a sports bra when she got buds. Deoderant? Wow, 7 seems awfully young for deoderant but if those twins are developing early then maybe they need it? My daughter started using deoderant around 11. The most disappointing thing about my daughter maturing? Trying to find a bra that wasn't underwire or padded like crazy. I mean really, they are young girls wearing AA or A, they don't need it. That said, if your daughter starts asking for a bra because her friends all wear them, go for it. Just buy her a few sports bras and she'll think she's all that and a bag of chips!

4 moms found this helpful

M.H.

answers from Raleigh on

The training bra doesn't need to come out until your daughter has little buds, but if she wanted one sooner, I wouldn't say no. There isn't any harm in having her wear one before she needs it (as long as it isn't some lacy, sexy thing!).

As for deodorant, I think whenever you start to notice a smell, but again, if she really wanted to start wearing it, there isn't any harm in having her wear one that is made for young girls.

3 moms found this helpful

T.S.

answers from San Francisco on

7 seems pretty young but there's no set age. Buy your daughter a bra and deodorant when she needs it, when her breasts begin to bud and when the BO kicks in!

3 moms found this helpful

P.M.

answers from Tampa on

I think girls should start wearing sports bras when they are obviously showing budding - budding that cannot be streamlined/hidden by camisoles, etc.

Deodorant should only be used once the child starts having a smell after sweating or stress. This usually occurs about a full year before the menstrual cycle starts. If they aren't smelly, they should not be wearing it!

I have major issues with Mothers who want to hurry their children along into adult hood or who allow the sexualization of their children by wearing skanky clothes, bras without reasons, etc.

2 moms found this helpful

A.W.

answers from Kalamazoo on

I think with this stuff it will be when I notice they need it (start developing or stinking) or when she notices and tells me. My daughter will be 7 this July and she doesn't need one for sure. Maybe these girls wore them for the sleepover so they felt more comfortable changing clothes together??

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K.M.

answers from Denver on

I would agree that if your 7 year old wants to wear something bra like now that is okay so long as it is not designed to look more mature than her age. I have seen 7 year olds in my sons class who could use something. I would also agree that it seems to do not harm to wear deodorant so if she wants to wear that let her. If you feel you should not do that until she "needs it" stay on top of the issue. That is my experience too like another mom posted here, that stinky sweat starts about a year before menstruation. If you believed my mom as I was growing up the stork delivered me and she used the bathroom just to wash face and hands so needless to say private discussions were just not had at all. I remember a particularly horrifying day in 7th grade when I realized how bad I stunk from sweat. Please spare your daughter that humiliation even if it is a few years.

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M.R.

answers from Phoenix on

7 seems a tad too young, but maybe their mother knows something we do not.

I just hope they are wearing a NATURAL deodorant at such a young age. Introducing those toxins and chemicals onto such young skin could have potential cancer risks....just sayin'.

My daughter was very athletic and played a lot of basketball and soccer, so she needed a 'training' or sports bra to keep her nipples from being chaffed. I don't know if she wore them to sleepovers though. That started in the 5th grade, but there was also buds developing.

1 mom found this helpful

T.F.

answers from Dallas on

I have a 16 yr old daughter.

When she was 7 ish she was wearing a sports bra type namely because she wanted to because it mimicked mom but also it was more comfortable for her. She did not have "buds" but it was also for comfort from some types of materials directly on her.

As a teacher, I notice some first graders that could use a sports bra.

Deoderant.... as soon as you notice any odor.

There is no right or wrong age or answer. You just do what is best for your family and don't worry about what others are doing.

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N.H.

answers from Austin on

I wouldn't worry about it til she actually has something to put in the bra. So what if the other little girls do that, perhaps their parents are either trying to rush the little girls into womanhood or maybe the little girls asked for them. I'd wait til she starts budding or asks for one then you can talk about it. As far as deodorant, she doesn't need it til she starts 'smelling' bad. Maybe the twins just see the mom do it & think they hafta do it too. Kids often mimic what they see the parents do. I wouldn't worry about it til those things are actually needed & that's usually starting around maybe age 11-13 in most cases. If your daughters ask about it, just explain that those things are actually for when they're necessary & for them they're not necessary yet. Good luck.

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C.P.

answers from Provo on

My daughter told me when she needed these things. I am sure that if I noticed that she needed them before she mentioned it then I would have said something. Girls are pretty up on hygiene and that type of thing. To my surprise, my son is pretty good about this kind of stuff also. I used to ask him why we need to buy so much deodorant and then I got on the bus with a group of stinky boys and I decided that I didn't care about that kind of thing anymore. LOL

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M.J.

answers from Dover on

I feel like you will know when your daughter actually needs these things because she will stink & have little buds!! My daughter started using deoderant, the Teen Spirit kind, when she was 8 because, well, she was getting a little stinky. We bought her first training bra right around 9 years old, but really, all kids are different.

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C.N.

answers from Baton Rouge on

No set age - some girls develop faster than others. My daughter had her first periood at the ripe old age of 9.

1 mom found this helpful

B.C.

answers from Norfolk on

Training bra when the breasts start swelling.
Deodorant when they start stinking.
And this will vary a lot with age, activity level and onset of puberty.
There's no one right age for everyone.
My period began when I was 11 and that was when I started with training bras and deodorant - I wasn't smelly before then and I was pretty flat right up through 7th grade.
And I HATED getting use to wearing a bra.
(Deodorant twice a day seems kind of excessive unless they really have a serious sweating problem. I think for most people right after shower or bath is enough.)

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T.C.

answers from Colorado Springs on

We don't use these things until they are needed. The training bra, no big deal. But, the deoderant, I would definitely hold off! Unless you use a non-aluminum brand of deoderant, this will be putting heavy metals in their system way too early. Aluminum is linked to alzheimer's, and I would think that the added 5 years or so of use on their developing body would be very bad for them.
Blessings!

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L.C.

answers from Washington DC on

My daughter is 16.
I went with her wants for this sort of thing. When she asked for a bra, we went and got one. In 6th grade they change for PE. I made sure she had deodorant at school and at home.
I think she asked for a bra in 4th or 5th grade -- she didn't really need one, but if it made her comfortable, then I was fine with it. :-)

YMMV
LBC

1 mom found this helpful

S.A.

answers from Chicago on

I'm responding late, but I agree that 7 is way too young. This is becoming more of a trend. I don't like it. These girls are in such a hurry to grow up. My daughter is 9. I make her wear an cami undershirt for now. She's not budding yet, but if she doesn't wear one, her nipples show through the shirt. If she's like me, she'll start budding at 10 and then get a training bra. I won't let her wear deodorant until she needs it.

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C.D.

answers from New York on

way to grown up i could see deodorant if they sweaty or smell but at night and then in am to much parents pushing little ones to grow up to soon dont need bra till they have something there everyon different at least not till 5 th grade

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S.S.

answers from Binghamton on

At age 7!?! Good grief. My kids got a training bra when they began to develop, around 5th grade as I recall. And deodorant once the hormone changes made it necessary. Your nose will tell you when.
Girls struggle enough with body image, why start earlier than you absolutely have to?

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C.B.

answers from Boston on

In our school system the girls and boys are separated in 5th grade (age 11) and told the facts of life and the girls get a sample of a pad/tampon/deodorant. I have 11 and 14 year old daughters, and both started wearing little sports bras (basically short tank tops) in gym on 5th grade because of showing little buds if they just wear t shirts. That is also about the age that they begin to smell when sweaty. Before that my girls would get wet under their hair on a hot day and sometimes their backs if it is humid, but they would still smell sweet. If they want to feel like big girls you could always get them a deodorant (not anti perspirant) to get used to the idea, as well as tank top bras. My 14 year old still only wears sports bras (champion brand) and has never yet had a "real" bra that adjusts and has a clasp in the back. She just pulls them over her head. I must state that I am small breasted and can get away with the same, so the story may be very different if girls have big boobs at a young age. Good luck.
PS: Walmart and Target sell flat sport bras for young girls in 2 packs for about $6 in lots of fun colors. We buy the Champion ones at Kohl's online.

B.S.

answers from Lansing on

Re: Bra - Whenever they have interest in wearing one, outside of needing to wear one.

Re: Deodorant: When I notice they need to start wearing it.

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A.T.

answers from New York on

As mom's we will notice when it is absolutely necessary to introduce deodorants and training bras. Usually, when the breast begins to bud and you can see it through the material. Sometimes you can see it in their demeanor, they feel awkward and cross their arms in front of their chest. As for deodorant, usually when puberty sets in and hormones change the body odor. In my girls, I have 2, I introduced deoderant and training bras at the age of 9. Sometimes though, your little girl may be introduced to these things earlier for a variety of reasons....she may have older sisters and want to be just like them, she may be very girly and watches her mommy do it and will immitate you or mommy is very girly and introduces her daughter at a young age to these things. I think 7 is just fine, it's an age where you begin to teach them about femininity and the type of hygiene that includes, to prepare them for the time they will really need it.

H.G.

answers from Dallas on

My neice is 10 but she is a little chubby and she's had a little sports bra since about 8 yrs old. She has no hair under her arms but that child smells bad if she doesn't put deodorant on! Not sure why but she needs it! I don't think 7 is too young. Learing good hygiene is always a plus!

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N.M.

answers from New York on

My dtrs wore little sports bras in 4th and 5th grade. They were only slightly developed but their friends were wearing them so they didn't want to be left out. It helpd them get used to the feel of them too. They got "real" bras when they needed them, both in 6th grade. Mine needed deodorant around the end of 5th grade. Once they needed that we had the bodies changing talk... or should I say began it, it's not a talk that is ever really over since they are ever changing!

M.H.

answers from New York on

My duaugher is 8 yrs old and does not wear any bra or deodorant. She does not smell and maybe a T under her cloths if something starts to show. I think this is way to early. I say maybe about 10 years old for me.

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N.B.

answers from Jamestown on

First off anyone using that much deodorant is not a good idea..at night and in the morning? Not a good idea. It could cause problems with the sweat glands.

Personally..when my daughter starts to stink then she will be introduced to deodorant. As far as the sports bra goes...when I notice her chest getting "bumps" then she will wear one.

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K.M.

answers from New York on

I think you need to discuss it with your daughter. If she feels that she needs a bra, then that's the time you begin. As for deodorant.... does she stink? When she begins to produce odor (usually puberty) then you get the items needed.

A.G.

answers from Houston on

i got my daughter a little bra for fun----shes 8. But i guess my answer would be get them a bra when the "fluffy nipples" occur and deodorant when a smell occurs.

I would never get her deodorant/antiperspirant for fun though, they are potentially hazardous and should be used when only in need. Most of the year i dont even need deodorant.

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P.K.

answers from New York on

Seven is way too young. You will know when they need a training bra
and deodorant. Moms know those things!!

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M.T.

answers from New York on

Little girls shouldn't wear deodorant. Some moms really push things. Perhaps the bralettes were for modesty. My daughter started using deodorant at 9 because she truly needed it. She started wearing a bra when she was 10 and starting fifth grade because while she was only starting to develop, that's middle school and involves changing for gym, so everyone wears one. People don't put on deodorant before bed, it sounds like they are "playing" with grownup products that they don't really need to have but were given by an indulgent parent. Maybe they are emulating an older sibling?

L.U.

answers from Seattle on

Training bras or sports bras at 7? Did they need them? My daughter will start wearing them when the need hits. If they are starting to develop than yes, I think it's fine to get them...I just think 7 sound so young!!
Deodorant? hmm...even I don't put it on twice a day! My son is almost 9 and he isn't wearing any yet. Boys are usually funkier than girls, right? lol If they are funky then I guess deodorant would be okay....
So, there you go...bras when you notice that they are needed. Same with deodorant!
L.

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K.F.

answers from Salinas on

Seven seems really young. I never "introduced" my 12 year old to bras, deoderant, shaving etc. She expressed interest first we talked and then got her what she needed. I think in most cases girls should express interest in these things on their own and beleive most will, it isn't our job as Moms to tell them it's time unless you have a little girl whose developing really early and is too immature to realize she needs these things. I also have an eight year old daughter and I cannot imagine her wanting a bra or deoderant at her age. She's too busy playing with her Barbies, snuggling stuffed animals, playing softball and thinking boys are gross to worry about turning in a woman. Let them be kids!

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K.C.

answers from Philadelphia on

Deodorant when they start smelling and bras when they can't wear a thin t-shirt without their little breast buds poking out and they're self-conscious about it. My middle daughter started wearing deodorant at around 7. She started wearing the sports bras around 9. This year, at 10, she has bigger breasts and is actually starting to grow out of the sports bras. She has also just started her period in the last week. A bit early, but not unusual for our family - when I met my SIL for the first time, she was 11 and FULLY developed physically (maturity came later, actually, she's 29 and still working on the maturity part).

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L.L.

answers from Orlando on

My daughter started wearing a sports bra around age 7 and same time for deoderant - when they start getting stinky armpits (and you will know!) that is the time for deoderant.

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