To Early for Training Bra??

Updated on August 29, 2016
V.G. asks from Grand Rapids, MI
18 answers

My oldest daughter is 7.5 and my youngest just turned 6. For some insane reason they both have it in their minds that they need to start wearing a training bra. I know that my 6 year old is not ready, that's for sure. However, I don't remember real well how my parents knew it was time for me to start wearing them - I was told it was time, and I did. So, how do I know when it is time for my daughters to begin wearing a training bra? Is there any harm in letting the oldest start wearing them when really there doesn't seem to be a need. Both girls have lumps where her breasts will be, nipples are not any more formed then they have ever been. Any help would be appreciated.

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So What Happened?

Thank you all so much for your feedback. Talking with my husband last night he said it was my choice - he didn't want any part of the "female" decisions - either he's being "very male" (not normal for him) or he just doesn't want his daughters to grow up, I talked with some other friends. I've decided that I will pick up my oldest daughter a couple training bras this weekend, they're cheap enough at Target for a two pack. However, the youngest one is just going to need to stay young for a little while longer. I know that she's no where near being ready, and if either one are like me the oldest will be ready before I know it - so...

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J.P.

answers from Detroit on

Just my two cents, if they want to feel like a grown up what harm is in it? Sooner or later they'll need them. If they're too young the novelty will wear off, if not they;ll feel more comfortable. We mom's have to be the bad guy so often, this is one where you can be wonder woman. Again just my opinion, do what you feel is right. Good luck!

2 moms found this helpful

R.D.

answers from Richmond on

You could start off by buying cami's with the 'build in bra'... totally appropriate for that age (and you won't feel like they're growing up too fast!)

My BFFs daughter is overweight and desperately needs to wear a bra. She's 10. My girlfriend and I went out and bought her a few pretty training bra's... but her daughter hates them! She's always taking them off... I wish more young ladies WOULD wear training bras if they need them!

2 moms found this helpful

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T.F.

answers from Dallas on

What is the harm? You can get athletic type bras and if they want to start, why not? You are not talking a Victoria Secret push up or something like that.

A lot of little girls may not "need" the bra and may want to be like mom.

As a teacher, I have seen plenty of 1st graders who NEED a bra and it is sad that the parents just don't do it because of the age.

Be open and communicate with your girls and keep those lines of communication wide open. You'll be glad you did when they become teens, etc.

5 moms found this helpful
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S.H.

answers from St. Louis on

it's more a "fashion" thing...than a developmental thing for girls today.

No harm in it......

3 moms found this helpful
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J.P.

answers from Chicago on

This recently came up with my 6 year old as we were shopping in the girls dept. at kohls and she spotted a rack of really cute bras. She asked, Can I get one of these? And I just told her that she doesn't need one yet, but we will get her one when she's a little older. I plan to wait until closer to puberty when she starts to develop and actually needs one.

2 moms found this helpful
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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

When they need the extra layers to protect their budding modesty. Boys can be cruel when the girls nipples start poking and showing. If they want bras buy them some sports bra types and let them were them as if they were just layers under tee shirts or tanks. That way no snaps to snap open or straps to flop around.

2 moms found this helpful

P.M.

answers from Tampa on

Having your child become sexually mature before their body is ready is a dangerous game. Bras are for breasts, not barely noticeable lumps. When breast buds get large enough to notice thru a single t-shirt - allow them to wear the camisoles under the shirts until they get some actual breast tissue - THEN start them on training bras. Do you let them shave their legs and wear a full face of make-up - just because they are interested in it? Do you let them wear coochie shorts, mid-drifts or mini skirts - just because they said they want some? I would hope not!

1 mom found this helpful
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K.P.

answers from New York on

There's no need for your 3rd grader or your 1st grader to be wearing a training bra, unless you can see something when they're wearing a t-shirt. They think it's "cool and grown-up", but in all reality they will likely be teased for wearing one. I wouldn't go for this one b/c it really encourages them to grow up faster then they need to.

Maybe try a camisole on your older daughter if she needs something. Aside from that, I would ask your daughters what is bringing this up and talk about what a training bra is for... actually, I'm not even sure what they're for. What do we need to train?

I remember starting to wear a camisole under my uniform shirt in 5th grade and a training bra in 6th.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.D.

answers from Dallas on

I don't think it is to early if they are interested in wearing them. I had to fight with my daughter to wear them, and she did need them! The little training bras at Walmart or Target are inexpensive, and if it avoids an argument when they really do need them, I say go for it.

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K.C.

answers from Detroit on

if they want them get them, training bras are really just glorified tshirts, I got my first for Christmas when I was 4 (matching panties set, kinda like underoos) and thought I was IT, then the fad wore off and I didn't wear them again until I needed them. I have always remembered to "pick my battles" will it really matter if they wore training bras early? no, it is just a phase...now if they are wanting to wear the pants with their panites hanging out the top or shorts so short you can see the bottom of their butt that gets a different response ;-)

good luck, I know how hard it is to let them grow up, my 9yo has been asking to shave her legs, I'm not ready and tell her that once she starts she can't stop and for now she is ok with it but she stilll asks frequently and she has darker hair so I know I am going to have to let her before I am ready, course I won't be ready till she is 20 sooo....

1 mom found this helpful
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J.K.

answers from Phoenix on

My daughter was 9 when she started developing nubs and my now 10 year old has nothing but sometimes will wear a tank topish type "bra" under things to be more modest. My first daughter mentioned wanted a bra at that same age as your girls so I got her one of those sports ones for little kids. But she soon realized how hot they were and didn't wear them again and then when she needed to, I had trouble getting her to wear them...LOL

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J.J.

answers from Toledo on

I started making my (now) 10 year old wear them when I could see her "nubs" through her shirts. I think it was around age 8 or so. I just bought her the sports bras, and a couple of the regular cotton ones with adjustable straps to wear with clothes that the sports ones didn't work with. Another option is the tanks with the shelf bra. At this point for us, its still just an extra layer so she's not "poking" through her shirts.

1 mom found this helpful

K.M.

answers from Chicago on

I would hold off until their body shows they need it, you can see something thru her shirts as others have suggested. This is another thing showing that kids are growing up too fast.

1 mom found this helpful
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S.T.

answers from New York on

Breast buds do begin around 9 - 11 but a bra isn't needed until it looks like it's needed. Some girls do develope very early - as early as age 7 - 8 - but that's a very few. Most girls don't being to need a bra until 6th grade - and since they're usually in Middle school and changing for gym in a locker room with other girls you'd want her to be wearing a bra at that time to avoid the nasty miserable girl comments.

I do think it's too early at age 6 to start - she needs to understand that she"s not always going to get whatever her sister gets - she'll get it eventually. But perhaps for the 10 yr old it's getting to be time - if she doesn't need it she'll realize it's uncomfortable and won't want to wear it. You'll know when she NEEDS to wear it - and you'll have days when you'll have to tell her to wear it because she won't want to. funny how that happens. ;o)

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C.B.

answers from Detroit on

For real? A 6 and a 7.5 year old? What do they know about body maturing at that age to think they're 'ripe' enough for a training bra?

I would absolutely not give in on this one. It's just way too early. Maybe ask them why they think it's time and then give them a very responsible adult answer that they aren't formed enough and that it doesn't happen until they're several years older. I mean really; if this is any misguided indication, they'll be asking to go on the pill at 10. Do them the biggest favor and redirect them.

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V.B.

answers from Boston on

I am a mother of Triplets two are girls and this weekend I went out to buy my 7.5 year old girls training bra. Just to comment on the previous answers about this matter. The middle daughter is showing through her clothes maybe so a little to chubby however, I notice she is showing through her blouses and decided she can have the training cami bras, the last girl is not showing anything but for her not feel left out I also let her choose a few also. When you have girls in the same house they want to do similar things alike and not to feel left out or picked on I choose a cami bra that will fit her little body so their is no animosity in my home among sisters. I do not feel bad about it at the end of the day we are all happy. it is okay to start the 6 year old year one if she ask for one if she have not notice her sister is wearing those and ask that is another story but if she notice and she ask let her pick out something that she likes since she don't have anything pick out the padded ones so she does not look to flat in the chest and she will be fine and happy also. That is my take on this.

Mother out of Boston V. B.

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A.D.

answers from Minneapolis on

I'd be interested to know how they came to have the sudden desire for training bras. Are they just seeing them in stores? Other kids talking about them or having them already and feeling the desire to fit in or keep up with them? TV or media exposure aimed at slightly older girls, tweens? That's what I would find out. I might tell them it is a little too soon (unless they really do have breast buds that YOU can clearly see need covering) and this fall, go shopping at Justice for some layered outfits with the cami tops underneath another shirt before I'd go the official "training bra" step. It really depends on the kid's individual development.

M..

answers from St. Louis on

I think when they start growing boobs and you can see them through their clothes, its time. Anytime before that would be pointless. Why let them grow up too fast?

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