Daughter Just Started Being Scared of Everything

Wow, that must be really hard for both of you. Has anything traumatic happened to her lately? At school or at home? I would try to talk to her and tell her that it's ok for her to tell you anything. Maybe the move has been harder on her than it seems. Good luck and I hope you two can get past this!

I agree with some of the other posters that you might want to have her talk to a professional just to make sure that there is not something more serious behind her fears. However, I would be willing to bet that it is something another child has told her or done (even just as a joke) that has scared her. It certainly wouldn't hurt to have her sit down with someone who knows how to draw more information from a child just to make sure it isn't something serious. Good luck.

This behavior change would alarm me terribly. It may just be a phase but not a common one. Usually fear is a reaction of something that has happened. I would comfort her every second that she is expressing this behavior to make her feel secure and I would have a dr. check her from head to toe to make certain that no-one has harmed her in any way. I would strongly encourage you to pay attention to this behavior and consult her doctor immediately.

I don't know what u believe in spiritually, but as a Christian I can tell you that as I read this I recognized a spirit of fear. This is a very real demonic spirit that can attach to children at a very young age. I was around that age when I began experiencing the same thing. It wasn't until after I got saved that God began showing me that the spirit of fear had actually taken hold at that age. Get her in a Spirit-filled church (Living Word Fellowship is a good one) and teach her that with God there is no fear, but peace and rest. She needs to know that if she believes in God there is nothing to be afraid of because He protects us.

it sounds to me like she just needs some more mommy-time. nightmares increase drastiacally around ages 5-7 especially in young girls and with changes in the household, maybe a little mom-time would help her with the transition. and definitely don't scold her for night wakings, because of increased nightmares around this age she may really need you. i know it's tough, but with a little added security she should be fine.

It must be a phase common to 5 and 6 year old girls. My 6 year old has been going through the exact same thing for a few months now. Everything you wrote that your daughter does, she does too. Yes, it takes patience, but I think they'll grow out of it. My advice is... go along with it as much as you can to make her feel safe and learn to choose your battles.

Children are such awesome and explicitly honest creatures. If there is upset or unbalance in our lives, trust me that your child will begin to mirror those upsets or unbalances from our lives into theirs. The difference is, depending on the age of the child, depends on how well they can express their understanding of what is upsetting them, scaring them, or bothering them. Many times you will have to look deeper than the surface to find the answer for yourself...especially if the child is not comfortable talking about the problem or does not know how to express the problem.

Household cleaning can wait. If someone is coming over to see you and judge your home on dust levels or to check if the carpet was vacuumed today, then have them make an appointment. If they are coming over to see you, let them in and visit. What I'm saying is, right now, your daughter is having an issue that warrants more attention than the dust rag or the Windex. The dust bunnies will still be there after you have either solved your daughter's fears or begun to tackle them.

Here would be some questions to ask / look at / view as food for thought.

How does your daughter behave with other adults other than your boyfriend? Is she withdrawn, sullen, excited, anxious, happy, at ease?

How does she behave with your boyfriend? Is she withdrawn, sullen, excited, anxious, happy,at ease?

What is her relationship like with her father? How often does she see him, what is your relationship like with him?

Has there been any fights in your home between you and your boyfriend - for any reason?

Is there any stress in the home right now - finances, relationship, career, health, etc.?

What is playtime like between your daughter and your boyfriend's son?

What is her playtime like between your daughter and other children.

How is your daughter doing in school? Does she like school, is she having problems in school? Is there perhaps something that was discussed in school by another student or teacher that upset your daughter?

How is her bedroom set up? Try sitting in it after dark. Are shadows cast onto her walls from a window by a moving tree or something else from outside. Is something coming to her window to scare her when she's in bed at night such as a kid or an adult (see back to relationship questions.

Snacking too late before bedtime can also induce dreams - sometimes vivid or scary ones. How soon before bedtime is she eating and drinking...and what is it that she is eating and drinking. Certain foods tend to "play" if consumed to close to bedtime.

When my kids were little, there were different phases we went through. One was monsters. I tried all the generic things like looking through closets, under beds, reassuring that there was nothing there. Then I got inventive.

I would pick up the phone and pretend to call the Monster Hot line. I would have an imaginary conversation with no one on the other side of the phone and ask if there was anything that could hurt anyone in our area. Then I'd say something like, "Oh good!" I'd come up with some far off distant area if my kids asked where the monsters or bad people were. Otherwise I'd just reinforce that nothing was there. The fact a call was made seemed to reassure them all over again.

Bath time - our 9 yr old son went through this about a year ago. My husband and I could not do anything. Finally we figured this out. The arrangement of his room cast shadows which scared him. But in the meantime, with baths, we kept the bathroom door cracked and we'd work on folding laundry in our room which connected with the bathroom. This way, our son could hear us, and we could definitely hear him, yet we could get things done while he was bathing. Bedtime would come and we'd make sure things like a night light was in the room, we'd read him a story or tell him a funny story about either him, me, his dad, or one of his siblings when one of us were little. I would rub my finger gently down his nose and ask him to have good dreams for me tonight. He would respond, I'll get some for you! This became ritual. We would sit with him about 5 minutes in the beginning and weaned it down to the ritual and then leaving the room. He's past the fears now.

I hope the questions I've posed will help you look at everything to find what is best for your little girl and to help her, and maybe something I've said will help you as well.

Take care and God Bless,

L.

How's her relationship with your boyfriend?

The house isn't haunted is it? Or has something happened to her that now she's afraid to be left alone? Those are my only thoughts. I have a 5 year old not that she's afraid of doing these things by herself she's just lazy and enjoys her Mommy doing them for her. Maybe she's just looking for your attention since you just moved in with your boyfriend. That could be it. Like children do when theirs a new baby in the house, they become clingy.

One of the reasons Halloween is such a good idea is that it healthy to make fun of our fears. I suggest Disney movies, such as Haunted Mansion, and Casper the Friendly Ghost, and ever Scubby Do. Having a fear of getting hit by car when crossing the street needs to be faced and overcome so you can cross the street. Fear of things that you can't see have to be over come with comedy and laughter. Show your little lady that these things should be laughted at, not accomodated. Good luck. This is a chance for major growth for you young lady.

My son went through this, and it turns out that other kids were behind it...telling him monsters were real and such.

I don't know why but this post really concerned me. I read it yesterday and really couldn’t think of anything to say but now I really think you should seek the advice of a professional, like a counselor. A lot of larger churches have counselors available that are reasonable/free. The fear might be normal adjustment to a new situation but it could be something much more serious that you’d just hate yourself for not investigating further.