Child Freaking Out When You Sing "Happy Bday" to Him

I had a cousin sort of like that growing up, he didn't like loud sounds, and this one party place for kids had a horn, he would always cry and when I was little I would say he would "ruin" my birthday, just too young to really understand. It could be a couple of things, the attention he's getting, or he could have a sensory disorder that loud noises affect him.
Ask him if everyone just says "Happy Birthday" if that bother's him, then everyone could say it and he could blow out his candles...
Happy Early Birthday to Him...

My daughter was the same way. Only she didn't like anyone singing to her. She still hates it, but tolerates it. When she was younger, I would ask her if we could sing to her, and if the answer was no, we didn't. Eventually she did let us sing to her because she knew it was important to us.

So skip the song and bring on the cake and ice cream!

Blessings....

My daughter hated it because she didn't like being the center of attention, even on her birthday. My inlaws were so rude about it and insisted that we do it anyway. 'Scuse me, but it's HER birthday. Why would you want to make a child unhappy on their birthday??? As you can see, I disagree with the previous posts that say do it anyway.

Yeah, it was strange, and sure, my daughter did outgrow it, but what we did was to choose to respect her wishes on her birthday and say as we were bringing out the cake:

"Let's say Happy Birthday and clap!" Then we'd say "Happy Birthday!" and clap. Then chow down on cake and icecream. We didn't really care about WHY it bothered her, we just figured it was her day, let her be happy.

If he doesn't want you to sing, don't do it. Hope you all have fun on his birthday!

No rhyme or reason. When he was really little, my son used to burst into tears when I would sing ANY song with "moon" in it, especially Moon River.
Don't sing it to him. You could substitute "For He's a Jolly Good Fellow". Do you do the "cha-cha-cha's" in between lines when you do Happy Birthday? It might distract him and crack him up. Do you think the four of you sound a little slow-boring-down-tempo? LOL
Anyway, I just wouldn't sing the song--allow him to make his wish, blow out his candles and he'll be fine!

Oh god, you've just described my niece. Ever since her 1st b-day, she has burst out screaming hysterically when we sing to her (or anyone else, for that matter).

At this point (she turned 5 this past spring) we just make a joke about how bad our family sings.
No idea why it happens. And it's just that song. But we do it anyway. She's getting better as she gets older. But it IS weird.

ask if you can wisper the song. Maybe the loadness of everyone scares him. If not then skips the song and go straight to the cake. Singing Happy birthday is fun, but not if it tortures the child. Its about celebrating them that day, do what is best for him.

That is sooo my nephew he freaks out and will cry and really just go hide in his room for the rest of the party so they just count his age and he can blow out the candles. So he just turned five and everyone counted out loud to 5 and then he blew them all out seemed to work for him just fine.

Really funny, could make a great funniest home video, except you hate to uspset him so much on purpose.

Maybe it embarrasses him to have the people he loves the most sing to him?. He becomes overwhelmed. Maybe it is too loud.

Ask him before his birthday what you all could sing to him instead. Would it be ok if you all hummed or if you all used kazoos or does he want you to all count to 5?

If he does not like it, do not do it. Don't try to figure out why, you will just
make yourself nuts.

My 2 kids hate a song, a different one each one. My older was a music from one music box I had, and my toddler when we sing opera style.
I will confess, I did it again to film them because I thought it was funny. But I stop after that. They were about 4 months both of them when this happen.
Maybe Denise is right and you guys sound bad when sign together. Have you ever went to Disney in Halloween at night, we went once and the had the same music that they play at day but they make it very slow and it sounded soo creepy!! LOL.
At 5 year old I wouldn't sing any more, I hope one day he can figure out why it bothers him and can tell you why.
Maybe you can get just a cd of the ship-monks singing instead.
I always laught with them. Or make your own happy birthday family song and ask him to help you guys.

Never heard of it, but he will appreciate it as a funny story one day.

Is is just "Happy Birthday" he cries at, or is it the fact of a bunch of people singing at him?

If he doesn't like it, then don't sing it -- it's his birthday. As a cute alternative, you can look up Las Mananitas on YouTube, it's the Spanish birthday song, but it's not the same tune or words (kind of strange birthday words, actually). You could sing that to him instead, if you are able to sing Spanish at all. You only have to sing the first verse. "Estas son las mananitas que cantaba el rey David, etc."

(On the other hand, per Laurie A, it WOULD make a really funny home video -- I have been known to scare my kid on purpose a couple of times and then tape it...it's really funny 10 years later.)

DON'T SING IT TO HIM! It's like the old Groucho Marx joke - man walks into the doctor's, sez, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." Doc sez, "Don't do that!"

Sing a different song, or better yet, tell him that he deserves a special song of his own and have him and anyone else he wants to have participate write a special birthday song just for him.

UNLESS...it is just the idea of a birthday freaking him out. Do you guys say things like, "When you grow up you will have a house of your own..." or anything that starts him thinking about getting older and having his life situation change in ways he just might not like? Honestly you would be surprised what can freak a kid. If that is the case then just downplay the birthday thing and just say "It's Joey Day!" or whatever and remind him he is still your little boy.

Something is going on there, but, let's face it, kid psychology can be pretty tough to figure out.

yep! my son always teared up at that one,very very normal. :>) lol

I was EXACTLY like this when I was younger. I grew out of it when I was maybe 8 or 9. I don't have any mental disability. But I remember clearly that I HATED it when people sang happy birthday to me and would always burst into tears. I don't know the reason why though.
I remember one birthday I had at a park with school friends. Mom came over and told me that it was time to cut the cake and I remember my heart pounding and freaking out inside. Mum who knew I freaked out had to get one of the other mums to sit on the other side of me and the kids crowd around me so I wouldn't run away!
I think maybe it was because I hated being the centre of attention, but not sure.
My parents never understood why and my mom would get slightly angry at me and ask me why I cried and I had no idea.
As I got older I trained myself to stop crying. I noticed no one else would cry at their birthdays so I was embarrassed and made sure at my next birthday I would tone it down a bit. When I started "weaning" myself off crying I would still cry, like my eyes would water, but I wouldn't make any sounds.
I think parents should do what they think's best for their child, whether singing it or something else. One way I wish they didn't get everyone to sing it because it was embarrassing for me to cry and know I was different, but then again I'm glad they did because it forced me to get over it myself and deal with it.
Still to this day (I'm 18) I get butterflies and nervous when mom says we're going to cut the cake. I get really embarrassed too when cousins and friends sing it to me and feel really uncomfortable.

Around that age my daughter told me "Mom you can't sing", and after that " mom you can't dance". I think it is an age thing.

For no reason what-so-ever, my daughter HATED the happy birthday song. So we allowed her to pick whatever song she wanted us to sing instead (she always chose Twinkle Twinkle Little Star). Every year we tried Happy Birthday first, but she would immediately begin screaming and crying and cover her ears until her 5th birthday (which was also when she had a party with friends). So I am guessing #6 will be okay next month as well.
I am sure your son will out grow it. Get whatever song you do sing on video tape because one day you will all look back on this and laugh together as you share this memory.

don't sing to him! he has made it clear that it makes him uncomfortable and scared. Maybe right before he goes to bed sing it to him softly as he is going to sleep if you just can't get through his birthday without singing! lol
L.