Another Sleep Question - Maple Lake,MN

Updated on January 31, 2008
K.W. asks from Maple Lake, MN
11 answers

I know someone recently asked a sleep question but mine is a little different. My 2 1/2 year old daughter will not go to bed the last few weeks and it is getting worse. She use to be so good about it but lately it has been screaming and crying. We put her down and as soon as you turn your back she starts whining. You leave the room and it is screaming. She will get out of bed and pound on the door screaming. We ask her what's wrong and we just get a "yes." At one point she said her lamp was scary so we bought a new one and that seams to be over with. I have tryed going in there and talking to her but she doesn't answer me. Is something wrong - yes. Can you tell me what it is - yes. what it is - nothing. I will have her close her eyes and she starts getting upset and cryes. I asked her about bad dreams and she said yes. But she says that to everything so I don't know if it is true. I have tryed to reasure her she is safe, they can't hurt her, mommy and daddy will protect her and she seams ok, and then I leave and it is the crying all over again. We have tryed egnoring her and it is the same reaction. Is this just a battle of wills or is there something really wrong? I thought about bringing her to the Dr but am afraid he will say there is nothing wrong.

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T.L.

answers from Minneapolis on

Do you have a night light for her? When my oldest one was around 2 she started to act up and the first night it was so bad she slept with us. We kept the hallway light for awhile and then we told her that we got her a nightlight and she needed to sleep in her room to have it. It was a pretty fun one and that did the trick. Also, I found out that what she was watching on tv was giving her nightmares so we bought some movies special for her and that seemed to help. Good luck! My second one is at that stage now but she is just stubborn.

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

We've been having sleep problems with our 2 1/2 year old as well. Putting him to bed is getting tougher. He's been waking up in the middle of the night and just screaming for mommy. He acts scared to death, but can not tell us what is wrong. The only thing that seems to help is if one of us sleeps in the room with him...something I said I would not do. But no one is getting sleep and he truly acts terrified. We've also had the challenge that he is waking up for the day really early. It seems like around this age I'm hearing of lots of sleep challenges. I don't know what it is all about, or what to do about it. I wish I had a magical way to help. We already have his light on dimmed to low, favorite things in bed with him.

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L.M.

answers from Minneapolis on

She might be having some new found seperation issues or fears of the dark. Try talking to her during the day. If it is a fear of the dark it will be easier for her to talk about when it isn't dark. If it is a fear make sure you don't dismiss it, talk it over and see if you can pinpoint what about it is scary to her.
I see that you have a realtively new little one in the house. Congrats! This could all have something to do with that as well.
Is there anything else that has changed for her recently (a move, a new bed, a new room, etc.). Something like this could be impacting her and it comes out when it is dark and quiet. My son went through a similar patch when we first moved him to his big bed and when his little brother was born shortly after that. I used to lay down on his floor for 5 minutes so his eyes would adjust to the dark. I would say "mommy will be in here for 5 more minutes" and I would kind of just count down. Now I just have to tell him that if he "REALLY needs me I will come" (he's 4 now).
Good Luck!

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C.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

I am going through the same thing, only my 2 1/2 year old falls asleep with me, then I move her to her bed and in the middle of the night she wakes up crying and sometimes it takes her 1-3 hours to fall back asleep. If you get any good advise please let me know!

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M.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

We used the Sleep Fairy book with our children and it worked wonders. It is a cute story about two little girls that couldn't stay in bed once put there. In a nut shell, when the children stayed in bed without crying, asking for more water, hugs, kisses, etc, the sleep fairy would visit and leave a small token/present under their pillow. We read the book each evening before bed, rewarded them when they acted in accordance with the sleep fairy "rules" and then weaned them down to 3X per week and then 2x per week, etc after they got comfortable going down.

Good Luck.

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S.N.

answers from Minneapolis on

When my oldest was 3 1/2, he had been sleeping just fine if we put him in bed and left the door open. All of a sudden he had issues going to sleep at night. I had to sit in a rocker next to his bed until he fell asleep or he would throw a fit. Finally I got him to tell me enough that I figured out he had had some bad dreams and was afraid to go to sleep. I tried to convince him that one side of his pillow was a "good dream side" and one was "bad dreams". Being the literal little guy that he is he asked how he would know the difference. I took his pillow case off his pillow and drew a smiley face on the corner of one side, and a sad face on the corner of the other side. I told him the smiley side was for good dreams,and sad was for bad. He checked his pillow every night to make sure it was on the "good dreams" side, and eventually would go to sleep without me staying in the room.
Good luck with your little one.

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L.K.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi K.- I have twin girls and they both at one time were afraid like your daughter. I pray with them every night at bed time and ask God to bless them with a good night sleep and that they have peaceful dreams. I let them know that he watches over us and protects us. We leave there doors open a little and have a night light in the hall on. I did this for 2 weeks in a row and still do. And they sleep through the night. Hope this helps.
L.

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K.C.

answers from Minneapolis on

Here's something that worked for us when my eldest daughter was 3 and doing the same thing: Have her pick a "special" stuffed animal (doesn't need to be a new one, could be one she already has); then conduct a special ceremony to empower the animal with "power" to bring her good dreams and keep her safe at night. We had an adult friend of ours conduct the ceremony because she is someone my daughter looks up to. She sprikled sparkly fairy dust on the animal who was placed prominently on a tall rock, said a official sounding speech about the dust bringing the power to the stuffed animal, and then we celebrated with a tea party. It worked for us and my daughter sleeps with that animal to this day (she's now 7 yrs.old).

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B.H.

answers from Minneapolis on

Cabin Fever may be setting in. Is she getting enough time during the day to burn off that energy?

Try really really wearing her out like a hour or two before bed, then have quiet time to relax watch a movie, read a book then try bedtime and see if that helps.

With being cooped up in the house with this nasty weather lately she may be restless or just not ready for bed but doesn't have the words to explain it.

I would definately try letting her run around the house, play hide-n-seek, jump on a mini trampoline, have a pillow fight, do summersaults anything to get that energy out this time of year.

I use to work in a homedaycare and once January hit the kids were horrible nap takers. So we would have them burn that energy and they were ALOT better.

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R.R.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi~

I dont have much advice and I have seen you have had alot of responses allready. I am going throught the same issues with my 2 1/2 year old daughter so please let me know if you have anything that works. I hate the crying out thing and I have tried it but how long is too long? My child is very stubborn and will go on for hours if I let her. Good luck

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J.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

Hi K.,

I don't really have advice for you, but will tell you that my son (born 4-24-05) has been doing the exact same thing, and has been a great sleeper/"bed go-er" since he was about a year. It is extremely frustrating. He has also been totally resisting nap time the past week or two as well. My husband and I have just been ignoring him. He screams about 1/2 hour, but does go to sleep. Really there is nothing else I can think to do, and I am usually totally opposed to the "cry it out" thing. But I know there is nothing wrong with him (he's had a drink, snack, is dry, etc.) and he IS tired... I would be totally willing to rock him to sleep, but he won't let me do that even, he just does not want to go to bed, and is pushing his limits and trying to see what he can get away with I think.

Good luck! I know I haven't been much help, but you are not the only one going through this incredibly frustrating phase.

J.

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