Advice on Potty Training Constipation

The ONLY thing that worked with my daughter was 2 tsp of mineral oil a day (mixed with some sorbet). I could never force/bribe/convince her to go poop, but at least the mineral oil kept it soft until she went on her own (sometimes waiting 5 days!). After I decided just to "ignore" the problem, she slowly got less anxious about it and is doing fine now. Good luck though, I know how much this sucks! :)

Well,I have a boy that is 8 now and is still having trouble
going. He has to be told because he holds it too.
It got really bad when he was 4-5 years old. We had to take
him to the Dr. and was so backed up he had to go through
lots of enemas and before stool softeners. Why!! I asked the
Dr. and he said it is common because their affraid and because
it hurts and is not as easy as going pee. Boys take longer to
train anyways and he is my second child. It took lots of
patience and prayer. I still have to remind him to go and it
will hurt sometimes but it is worse if you wait and is
reminded of the enemas. It is a control thing for him.
I don't mean to scare you but you will get through it and
hope it's before I did.
D.

After reading all the other contributions, the only thing I can think to add is possibly watching "Potty Time with Bear," one of the Bear in the Big Blue House videos. Whenever potty training issues pop up for us we pop it in the VCR and it helps the one being potty trained to remember they are normal and it is just a normal part of life and growing up.

Just hang in there. It is a process of learning that it is ok to poo in the toilet. He is still young. I wouldn't worry about it.

Good job.

it will happen, i work at a pre-school and we get a lot of kids that fill uncomfortable going at school when they first start using the potty, but it just takes time and they get more comfortable with the process. they just need to feel relaxed.

My son is doing the same thing. It didn't start until he learned to stand up and pee. I know it is the problem, but I don't think it is fear. He runs into the bathroom, pees and runs out. It takes way to long for him to undress, sit and go. He wants to play with his train track, and now!

When my 2 year old was constipated, usually a long, hot bath did the trick. It relaxes the muscles and lets the stool pass easier.

Good luck!

My son went through the same thing about the same time, at two and a half. Have you tried asking your pediatrician? I finally did, and his wonderful pediatrician gave us a number of choices. According to our pediatrician, juices and raisins do not soft the stool. Only pears, peaches and plums will. Cut back on rice, apples and bananas. In any case, that didn't work for our son. We tried the Metamucil crackers plus a plethora of over-the-counter and one prescription supplements to soften his stool. Again, failing there. What finally worked was actually a mental process. Even though he knew instinctually, we went through the whole ingestion, digestion and excretion process, necessity, how it works on a two year old level. He knew we all did it. We asked him if he wanted to do it in his potty (the toddler one) or ours. He wanted our toilet, so we took him to pick out his own seat (the ones that goes on our normal toilet seat to make it smaller for them). And, in our house, my husband and I started to announce our #2 business, letting our son know how good it feels after, and almost making it into a fun game sort of thing, asking each other if it's time or compare when and well, I'll leave the rest to your imagination instead of totally grossing you out. I know. Not exactly class, but it worked. It took about a month, which is fast compared to all the other stuff we tried. The whole took about 6 months. Seemed forever. Our pediatrician said that every kid is different though this problem is common, the solutions are not. He did mention that for some, it's a psychological block, and as parents, we have to try to relax so they don't pick up on our stress over this issue. We took it a step further and made it fun. He's six now, and has not had any more pooping issues. Good luck.

This happened with both of my kids. My daughter would wait until we put on a diaper, then go and eventually graduated to the toilet. My son would hold it, just like yours, even if we put a diaper/pull up on. It got so bad -- 3 days sometimes -- that his stomach would hurt. He too would run to the potty but he'd hold it and get off almost immediately. So what I finally did was go with him and as soon as he sat down on the toilet, I put my hands on his butt cheeks and gently pulled so those muscles were forced to relax. It sounds a little gross but it was the only thing that helped. I then rewarded him, praised him, reinforced it by asking if he felt better. It took several times but then he was fine.

This can be very serious if not dealt with now. My 5 year old just got over chronic constipation (started around 18 mos). She is now on Miralax, a non habit forming laxative to keep her stools soft as to not get impacted again. (Note, when the child has been holding it for awhile and it becomes impacted, the spinchter muscles get stretched and they can't poop w/out some help). She gets half a scoop of Miralax in a drink daily. You might want to check with your Dr. first. Two days of holding isn't bad, but it can get worse, we went 14 days back in Dec. when we had to go to Children's, etc.. long story but catch it now! He is most likely scared because his poops have hurt in the past. Definetly get them soft. If this becomes more serious, you may email me directly and I can tell you specifically what happened and what we had to do, but if you get on something asap you should be OK. This is all assuming he is already drinking plenty of water and eating plenty of whole grains, fruits and veggies. Ground flax seed or oil is great to add to diet constipated or not. Also, if he is more comfortable pooping in a diaper then let him do that, he might need to until he realizes they don't hurt anymore. Best of luck to you!
M.
____@____.com

Previous respondent Michelle is correct... my daughter had the same problem, constipation during potty training...and we went to a Pediatric Gastroenterologist, per our Pediatricians recommendation. As noted, "constipation" like this is called "with-holding" and the more they with-hold (going #2), the more impacted it gets. It's a vicious cycle.... on top of that, the more impacted it gets, the more constipation, and thus the more "fear" of going potty because it hurts, and thus they "with-hold" more, and it gets more impacted and backed-up, and the cycle goes on and on. I don't want to "prescribe" what to take, as I am not a doctor and I don't know your child. But we had a certain "regime" and sequence of treatment to do with our girl. But, "whole" juices...not refined juices, such as pear or apple are recommended. Also, mineral oil... but again, I can't say how much to take, as it may be different for each child. But... it has to be "unplugged" so to speak... and the child has to get back onto a "normal" cycle of BM. That is the key. It took time, as directed by the doctor... and over a span of a month or so, my daughter got better. The stool has to get softened...and normalized. Yes, as Michelle said, fiber and the types of food ingested makes a difference. But, for some children, it is "emotional" as well....and they "with-hold" for these reasons. Perhaps check with your Pediatrician. It is not an uncommon ailment though. But it will take time and gentle encouragement. I hope this helps...good luck.
~Susan
www.cafepress.com/littlegoogo

My friend had a similar problem. My daughter was about the same age as her daughter. When she came over they played for a while and then when my daughter pooped we made a big deal about how wonderful it was, said good bye and sent it down the water slide. We had fun and she seemed to think it was ok after that.

My daughter would scream every time I put her in the bath tub. I took her to a friend's house, she watched the kids take a bath, play and have fun. After that she would beg to take a bath and once a day wasn't ever enough.

Just giving him a new perspective might help.

Two of my three children went through the same thing. Our oldest was constipated for almost 6 months! The best advice I can give you -- continue with the juice, raisins, anything that will make him go. The longer it lasts, the more afraid he might get. Good luck!!