Adoption - Reston,VA

Updated on October 18, 2010
K.B. asks from Reston, VA
10 answers

We have had the little guy since he was 9 weeks . He is going to be 3 . We have known his father since 2nd grade. The mothers rights have been terminated and the father relinquished his rights. What kind of party can we throw for the adoption. We want to invite friends and family.
thank you for your suggestions. Anymore suggestions on how to annouce the adoption - one I like is Forever Home party

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answers from Boise on

You can throw any kind of party that you want. It is a celebration! I would just make it a family/friend party. It doesn't need gift bags, or decorations, or anything, and it should be for the whole family to celebrate the new "addition".

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answers from Washington DC on

Your child is young as are those of other responders, and you seem to be saying you have just technically finalized the adoption process, so a small very close friends-and-family get-together would be nice to commemorate this big accomplishment....which it is, but at this stage for the parents, not the child. It will be like a happy announcement---a celebration of emotion, but with no gifts. As an adoptive parent of two children we felt too many adoptive parents harped year after year about the status of their children and actually made them feel 'different' by hosting adoption as well as birthday parties. These parties began to be more for the parents than the child, who often looked uncomfortable. In fact, when our children got a little older we asked them if they wanted to celebrate their 'adoption date' and they looked at us like we were nuts!! They have always been comfortable with their status, which we announced as you would a birth by sending cards but without a party, and they know their "stories", but also know it is their personal private information to share or not with others. Thus I would suggest that after this party you are planning for your 3 year old, there are no others specifically hosted around an adoption theme, and you simply celebrate his birthday and all of you just being a wonderful, lucky family each year!
And congratulations--any adoption is a long and complex process---you have all been rewarded. Time to celebrate!

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answers from Richmond on

i would simply tell him that sometimes the stork gets the wrong address the first time. i like the forever home theme. my mother was adopted
K. h

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answers from Denver on

I agree with Workinmom - whatever you want. We do seperate "Homecoming" and birthday parties for our adopted son. You don't want to lump those 2 together. If you are celebrating him turning 3, celebrate that. If you are celebrating the adoption, maybe a "Forever Home" party.


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answers from Dallas on

Is it too late to have a family portrait made and use that as an announcement and invitation? That would be nice to have a picture of everybody together. "The _____ Family is overjoyed to anounce the adoption of ______. Please join us for a Forever Home Celebration to welcome our newest memeber."

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Cumberland on

How about-Our son is turning three!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I stay with the birthday theme-it's like a birth-a new beginning-God bless you!

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answers from Sharon on

well invite friends of your family and invite some of your family members

1 mom found this helpful


answers from Washington DC on

We have "Gotcha Day" at our house. We celebrate on the day Judge Finifter signed the papers with family and VERY close friends (not a big shindig) to make it something different than birthdays and holiday parties where there is a crush of people - the idea is to celebrate our FAMILY and our ADOPTION STORY. So we tell our adoption story to our girls (in simple language), have cake and ice cream, and make it our own holiday. Our girls are 4 and 5 now - BTW, and we have had them since they were 5 mos and 15 mos. Oh, and no presents. Family is its own present on that day...

You may choose a huge party, and your tradition may evolve over time. How your family was made is such a personal thing to all of you, you should celebrate however you want. I just wanted to let you know our tradition.

Enjoy your son. God Bless.



answers from Norfolk on

I like your Forever Home party idea. I, too, was adopted. We didn't celebrate my adoption every year and personally, I'm glad. By not having something to distinguish that I was any different really made me feel like I was with my family. I love my parents soooooo much and have had such a wonderful life with them I've never felt adopted and never had any desire to meet my birth parents. I feel like my mother gave birth to me. I'm 34 and sometimes forget that I'm not biologically related to my family :) I just wanted to tell you what a wonderful thing it is that you're doing by having adopted that little boy. I hope that as he grows he'll feel about you the way I feel about my parents. It's a wonderfully giving, caring thing to do adopting a child and it makes me so happy every time I hear an adoption story. :) Congratulations!



answers from Washington DC on

I'm sure finalizing the legality of your son's adoption is important to you--but is completely beyond the comprehension of the typical three year-old. I think celebrating a "Forever Family Homecoming" seems to negate the past 147 weeks that he's been with you. Annual celebration of a "Gotcha Day" (or similar) again will simply highlight his status as an adopted child. Are you aware that these sorts of "celebrations" are widely perceived by adoptees as offensive?

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