8 Month Old Won't Sleep in Own Room.

Good morning M., my son is now 18 months old. I had the same problem with my son. What we may want to try is giving her a bath/wipe down before bed. He then picks a story book from our library in our office. We then head to his room he climbs in the bed, we read a story then say our prayer. The night light then turns on, and we say mommy/daddy will be right back. I check in on him every 3 minutes or so. Some days he's crying but by the second check in he's sound a sleep until the morning. No don't move the crib back into your room. You may also want to try this on a Friday night till Sunday that way you';; have the weekend for this challenge.

I would avoid the lights at night thing...as it messes up melatonin.
sadly, our culture loves to send babies away at night...and expects them to adapt to this isolation. I am sure you are aware that stranger anxiety comes and goes in babies and children as they mature. You can expect the same for sleep patters. Fear of being and waking up alone can and will probably will come and go...which is why all those sleep trainer books are not a sure fix. Parents have to retrain the "sleep alone thing" because it is not something kids naturally do at a young age, like learn to walk or eat.

I would try spending as much time during the day in the room with her, doing fun, happy, and comforting things, to help get her comfortable in there. Also, does she have a lovey? You can encourage her to attach to a comfort object by holding it with her when she's nursing, wearing it inside your shirt so it gets your smell, etc. Good luck!

It could be just a developmental stage also. I would just keep putting her in there asleep, slowly working towards having her fall asleep on her own, if you see value in that. It most likely is just a stage that she will go through quickly if you deal gently with her. Hang in there!

I would say count yourself lucky that your daughter was putting herself to sleep by herself at 8 months old at all! My two boys didn't start that until amost two years old. The younger one a few months sooner than the older one, but not nearly as young as your daughter. I always just took the time to rock them to sleep before putting them in their cribs, my thought was that if they ended up crying themselves to sleep, they might be start to think of going to bed as a punishment. Both of my boys moved out of our room at around 6 months, and I kept a monitor on them in their room so I could run in there immediately if they needed something. I kept that up until they had toddler beds that they could get out of by themselves, and I never closed their doors.
Now they're 4 and 2, and bedtime is a happy cakewalk!

Hey M.,

I was reading through all of the responses and I know that people do things differently, but I strenuously disagree with the notion that if you help your child to fall asleep, you will never "be free" of that routine. I also think withholding eye-contact and ignoring your child in this instance is unnecessary and kinda mean. I have never agreed with the notion that children need to be taught to "soothe themselves." Secure children learn to do that themselves naturally-it doesn't have to be a forced thing. I think that notion has gained popularity because it excuses a parent from having to respond to a child's needs when the parent just doesn't feel like it anymore. Just my opinion, but I believe it strongly. Okay, stepping down from my soapbox now...
I don't think that if you rock your daughter to sleep for the time being you'll ruin her sleep habits or yours. She wants to be rocked and held-what's wrong with that? Give your baby what she wants right now. She deserves it, and what is it really taking away from you to do it-a little extra sleep, an extra half an hour of t.v, alone time with your hubby? I know that all of those things are important and that being a parent is as draining as it is rewarding. but this time of your life is so short and the impact you have on your daughter will last forever. Children are taught empathy by receiving it. Babies are sensitive, sentient beings, and they don't like to be ignored or denied any more than any person does. I think it's counterintuitive to do these things to a baby, the most open little being there is, and expect to produce any positive result. She will learn to go to sleep again on her own soon and you'll look back on the time you spent holding her with longing. My kids are 2 and 4 and I co-slept with both of them. They sleep perfectly fine without me now, all through the night, give or take a random night or two. I'm not suggesting you co-sleep (although we loved it), but I do want you to know that kids who are nurtured to sleep grow into independent "self-soothers" too.
Shew! Here endeth the gospel according to Al. Seriously, though, follow your heart, not your intellect. The heart is the right counselor when it comes to your daughter!

Take care,

Al

Sounds like your child is going through a sleep regression.
They happen at around 9 months, is she 8 1/2 months or close to 9 months?
If so, ride this out without bringing her crib into your bedroom and she will go back to normal soon. I’ve listed a couple of suggestions below of how to do this.

Or she may be rattled by the new surroundings. Children are far more sensitive to other people’s energy than adults are. Does your new place still feel like the old owners? If so you may want to think about how to deal with that.

Suggestions for putting her to sleep:
1. Try using Gerber Lavender Bath in her bath to calm her and make falling asleep easier.

2. You can also add a 1/4-cup of regular table salt to the bath. This will relax her muscles just like Epsom salt does, just no drinking the water when you put salt in there. She may be tense knowing that bedtime and separation are coming. This sounds weird but really works for children of all ages, it gets the squiggles out before bed!

3. Put on some soothing music on very low each night as your putting her in her pj's and as you do your routine for sleep and keep the music going until she's sound asleep. You can also turn the music on again if she wakes during the middle of the night; it becomes a transition helper for her. That's why they use it in daycare.
A music transition sends her clues that it is safe and time for bed. This works for a lot of children and can really help. It should be very soft quiet music; classical is best.

4. Each night you'll be putting her in her crib just a tiny bit sooner than you did the night before, so she will be sort of awake and need to help herself go to sleep. Yes, she will wake right up, that's okay.
Put her in her crib, mostly sleep-sort of awake, and if she’s really upset, lay down on the floor beside the crib and be silent, say nothing and no eye contact. Calm her if needed by laying her down and patting her on the back. Then you lay back down on the floor, basically ignoring her.
Being there will make her feel safe, yet still send the message I am ignoring you go to sleep, and allows her to find her own way to self-soothe and fall asleep by herself.
If she uses your presence to keep herself awake, say nothing and leave the room, then go back •10 seconds• later and lay down and say one thing, "go to sleep", then say nothing again and ignore her. You may need to leave the room and come right back several times in a row until she gets that mom is here, but not paying attention-I guess I should go to sleep.
Do this as many nights as needed until she has the habit of going to sleep and feeling safe.

5. Now begin leaving earlier and earlier each night and letting her cry a tiny bit until she gets used to you leaving.
If she gets sick, say nothing, and clean it up, calm her, and repeat the process of laying down then leaving.
She will get the message and you haven't abandoned her. Every parent goes through this at one time or another and it's no fun.

If you wait until she is sound asleep each night before you put her in the crib you are setting yourself up to do this again and again each night. She needs to find her own way to sooth herself into sleep, without you or you will always need to be part of the routine.

My suggestion begins as if you're going to stay with her every night but has the goal of you leaving and a plan to make that happen.

Good Luck-The Mommie Mentor