2 Year Old's First Overnight with Grandma

Updated on April 11, 2012
R.P. asks from San Francisco, CA
10 answers

I'm a first-time Grandma with a 2 year old grandson who I see every weekend. I'm planning on having him stay at my house over a 4-day weekend so my son and DIL can go out of town. Of course he has visited my house, but he's never stayed overnight. He's still pretty close to his mama (only chld so far) and daddy. Is this an OK age for this first time experience? We're going to do a one-night dry run before the long weekend. Any tips? You'd think I'd remember more from when my kids were that age! I'm going to plan alot of activities to keep him busy, and get out of the house if weather permits. Kind of worried about the nighttime when he's likely to miss his parents the most. He does get out to solcialize with other kids, but hasn't started any preschool yet and really hasn't had a babysitter as far as I know. Thanks for your insight. RP

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So What Happened?

Thank you everyone, what a great response and most helpful and reassuring information. I will get back when we've had our weekend; but for now I feel much better about it.

Postscript: Both the trial-run overnight and the 4 day weekend went fine..much to my relief. It turns out dealing with a toddler is like riding a bike; you never forget. There were a couple of tearful patches, but for the most part we had fun, and he slept through the night. He was pretty glad to see Mommy and Daddy when they picked him up after the 4 days, but until then he hadn't had any anxiety. Of course, the following weekend when I visited them at his house and wanted to take him out in my car, just for a couple of hours, he'd have none of it. We went for a walk instead.
Altogether, a wonderful success and really good time spent with my grandson.
-R

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M.P.

answers from Raleigh on

My kids started staying with the grandmas at about 6 mos old. They live close by and it's so wonderful to get a break every now and then. My mom and MIL handle them like pros! Grandmas rule! :)
Just plan on wearing him out so that he goes down easy at night. He will be fine and you two will have so much fun! It's so important that kids get to bond with their grandmas!

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R.R.

answers from Dallas on

When my 3 year old grandson visits, I have to remind myself to be in charge and it makes the visit much easier. He's been spending the night with me since he was 3 months old (his momma has health issues and is often hospitalized). He loves me like crazy, and it's the most special feeling in the world!

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G.B.

answers from Oklahoma City on

Get him really tired before bedtime, like at McDonalds playground. Then when you are coming home he may just fall asleep in the vehicle. That way it's just off to bed once his clothes are changed.

I started at just a few months old with my grandkids. My daughter needed the sleep. It was always easy after that, they even had their own space for clothes and toys.

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C.P.

answers from Columbia on

Everything will be just fine. I'm actually surprised that he hasn't stayed over sooner! I spent the night at Grandma's even when I was an infant. So did my boys.

Regardless, ensure that he has his favorite night time things with him...and ask his mom what his routine is. Try to keep it similar so he doesn't get upset.

When I stayed and Grandma and Grandpa's, I'd always get up early in the morning and climb into bed with Grandma. I was never allowed to do this at home, but remember it as a very fond memory...even into my teen years. She also sat me on her lap until I was too big to be there. :-)

I miss her terribly and envy you for being at the very start of your relationship with your grandson. Enjoy it!

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K.S.

answers from Minneapolis on

My son did his first sleep over at grandparents home at that age. He had a blast! Enjoy!

C.T.

answers from Santa Fe on

My daughter stayed w grandma and grandpa for the first time right before she turned 2. It was for 5 nights. I was SO NERVOUS about this. She did have her big brother there which helped. The first night was the worst but grandma just cuddled in bed with her a lot. The other nights she went right to sleep without all the crying. Grandma took the kids to do something fun and exciting every day and kept them really busy (which my 2 year old loves) and around other kids. She seemed to have a great time and really bonded with Grandpa - he is now one of her all time favorite people and she talks about him all the time. :) She really charmed Grandpa - he is known for being really really frugal with money and he saw her watching her brother ride his bike. He took her out the next morning right after breakfast and bought her her own tiny bike! Of course she is too small to ride a bike but he would hold her on it. The fact that he did this kind of blew away Grandma, haha! Anyway, it all seemed to go very well except for that first night. We did not video chat with her while we were gone because we knew that would make her miss us.

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H.M.

answers from Dallas on

That is a great age I think. I don't remeber when my youngest spent the night for the first time with my parents. We lived with them when I had my oldest. But I agree wth the others that said to make sure you now if rutine for night time. And that you have his favorite animal and blanket and maybe even pillow. Or if he's like my youngest several favroite animals. You will have a blast.

Good luck and God Bless!!!

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A.H.

answers from San Francisco on

Good for you. What an awesome grandma!
I've left my children with grandma and then both grandmas for a few nights at a time. What I observed was this: when I return, the kids are fine. Grandmas are beyond exhausted.
Pace yourself! Yes, plan other activities, but don't plan something for every single second of the waking hours of the day. It's okay to expect some down time from the toddler. He can probably begin to play by himself a bit and this will be good for both of you. So don't overdo it.
Good idea to do a trial run before the 4-day weekend.
You'll both be fine and feel much closer to him at the end, which is the best part.

R.H.

answers from Austin on

Wow, maybe this is a racial/cultural divide. I am black and my son (and all of his cousins) first began staying with my mother overnight after about 8 months old.

S.T.

answers from Washington DC on

how wonderful for both of you! and very wise of you to do an acclimating visit before the long weekend.
i wouldn't worry too much about a lot of scheduled activities. keep his nighttime routine as close to what he's used to as possible, but don't be too anxious about that either. over time you'll develop YOUR routine with him that will become part of the precious 'grandma and me' memories you'll be creating.
just plan to be calm, no-nonsense and comforting if he gets angsty for his mom. at 2 he'll almost certainly have a few, but your relaxed this-is-no-big-deal attitude will go much further toward helping him deal with it than too much fluttering and frantic soothing.
i hope it's a magical visit for both of you.
:) khairete
S.

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