16 Month Old Biter

H.,
The best I can recall when my 20 month old was doing that, it was around that age. If she is doing it at home, might I suggest instead of time out... which you said the school is doing, she is not going to understand that, instead check to see if she has teeth coming in and if so, let the daycare know, and provide them with the teething medicine, also tylenol for infants for the pain. I would buy two bottles, and empty one into the other than measure out just enough for the hours she is there, and tell them to not throw away the bottle, but give it back to you for the next time. That way you will not worry about them overdoseing your child. ;-)
If she is doing it for other reasons, such as to just bite, maybe ask them to stick a cold ice cube to her mouth, and tell her no biteing, that is a no no, but they need to be on her level, knealing down for her to understand what she did wrong, and it needs to happen as soon as she bites someone. Then ask her to hug whoever she bit and try to work with her on saying "I'm sorry" and then congratulate her for responding with a hug and you tell her "that is a sweet girl", in a soft spoken voice. You may want to practice with her at home if she acts out, so she will catch on to what happens for punishment and for being a sweet girl. Mine did this at home with biteing older kids and myself, and this did work on her, she caught on quickly and quit biteing after two days. H. that helps.

I am on the receiving end of this problem as my daughter is being bitten at school. I posted a question a few days ago that you should read the responses to. It was on how much responsibility a daycare should take with biting. Some of them were from parents of former biters and had some helpul suggestions. Although, my child is the one being bitten, I do sympathize with you as I am sure you must be frustrated. Good luck.

I know your pain. My oldest, now 9, began biting when she was about 1. She bit, what seemed like, forever. We tried everything. When I say everything, I MEAN EVERYTHING. You know, nothing helped. There was never any particular reason why she bit. She just did. Every child every day several times per day. I was getting very frustrated. One day she just stopped. Never bit again. It was the oddest thing. We never knew why she bit or stopped, but thankfully she did and so will yours. One thing I was glad about was that she was young and had very few teeth. Thank God she was a late teether and didn't have a mouth full!!
Good lcuh and just remember she WILL stop.

Well, first of all, she's 15 months old. Biting at this age is a normal behavior. It is a natural stage of development and there are several ways to handle it. Putting her in time out is not a solution. When you put a child this age into time-out, it puts them into a defensive state that could actually make the biting worse. The "solution" then turns into the cause. The teachers in her class should be doing several different things. First, they should be keeping her involved in activities. (all the children should be engaged) When a child is busy, their minds aren't likely to wander off into things like wondering what another child tastes like. (and yes, it could be as simple as that.)Second, if the biting is a serious problem, they need to "shadow" her. This means that there is always somebody watching. This will do a couple of different things. It will help to stop her from biting, and it will identify the cause. But remember, there may not be a cause. This is a natural stage of development.

The most important thing that I can tell you is that your child is not "bad" or "mean" or anything like that. She's normal. She's curious. That's a good thing. All we have to do is teach her different ways to either explore her world or express herself. I run one of the largest childcare centers in NWA. We deal with this on a daily basis. Tell her teachers that when she bites, they need to get down on her level and tell her very firmly that biting hurts and we do not bite our friends. She needs to see the results of her actions immediately. If the adult reaction is delayed, it is not meaningful. The teacher needs to lavish the other child in love and affection with her watching. Children want attention. If she sees another child getting it, she will want it. Don't expect immediate results but it will get better. Just make sure that you are on the same page as the teachers and keep the consequences consistent. It really will get better. If the school kicks her out because of it...well frankly honey...their not a very good school.

We went through the same thing with my son at the same age, he was gettign six teeth at the same time. Either way though, he had to learn that biting wasn't ok before it went from being a coping mechanism to a behavorial problem. We would get right in his face and say, "We don't bite! Biting HURTS!" and make him apologize. The other day (3 months later) he accidently caught me with a tooth while we were wrestling and he immediately said, "We don't bite! I'm sorry!" He eventually got it, and your daughter will to it just depends on the caregivers and how they handle it. Time-out is not effective at this age!

G.