11 Months and Refuses to Sleep at All

Child have to be taught to sleep on there own. Has she ever? I.e. is this new...or has she always been like this? My son had this problem... and we created it. He hated his crib. As a baby he slept in the swing... then he would wake and I'd bring him to bed with us. When my daughter was born, I swore I wouldn't create the same problem. At about 8 weeks we started putting her to sleep while she was awake. She is a great sleeper. Kids need to learn to fall asleep on their own...so that when they wake up at night they know where they are...and how to fall back asleep on their own.

I would start and enforce a bedtime routine. Tubby, book and rock and the to bed...awake. I'm not a big believer in crying it out...but at 11 mos, I'd like her cry for up to 30 minutes...

Good luck.

Are you putting her to sleep in your arms first, like rocking her? That has got to stop, as pleasant as it is to snuggle with your baby, you need to teach her to fall asleep on her own. You can snuggle all you want during the day. Of course she wakes up when you put her down....if someone was holding you and put you in your cold bed, wouldn't you? Read Babywise now, or this will be your life for the next couple of years. Good luck, and you just might have to listen to her cry. I am pretty sure it won't ruin her life, but not getting enough sleep will damage her brain. (there is scientific evidence to support this)

N. ~
My son was the same way.
What I finally did was put him in a bed instead of the crib...he was about 13 months old and slept well with me, but seemed to hate his crib. Try a toddler bed, so that it's low to the floor, but has sides so she doesn't roll out...put a baby gate at the door if you need to so she's not wandering all over the house.
My son was fine in the bed!
D.

I have been there!! You can only go on 2 hrs of sleep for so long right?? I had asked all my friends, and read countless books, She just wasn't a sleeper, and still isn't the best, but we had a great year after I read.....
Sleepy Planet. It's purple, and fantastic. You can find it in any borders or Books & nobles.

I'll tell you the gist, but I still think it is worth getting, and is about 14 bucks.

Have a routine. Ours was dinner, bath (every night) I'd breast feed, till she feel asleep then try to put her in the crib. this was so WRONG>

As the book explained it, she's going to sleep, all comfy, warm, in ur arms, then wakes up,and OOOHH NNOOO where's mom, where am I, I wasn't here when I feel asleep!

SO, our new routine was:
dinner, bath, I'd feed first, then hand off to dad for story time (yes even at 11 mo old) Dad had a nice soothing voice, but you put them in the bed, groggy, but awake!! This is a must.

Now there maybe some crying, but it willbe controlled. She's learning how to put herself to sleep.

So, you wait 5 mins, if she's crying.
go into the room, and say, (name) it's ok, mommy is still here, it's time for you to sleep now, I love you,
And out. Short and sweet. You don't want to be in the room for more then 30 sec.

You are just reassuring her, that you are still there, and have not abandoned her.

repeat for 10 15 15 15

Ours only hit the 2nd 15 min then was done. It did take about a week.

In the book they tell you how to deal w/ other things that might interfere, peeing, vomiting, etc.

It worked so well for our daughter, she slept like a champ for almost 2 yrs, until we moved with that. And now we have started the nite time potty training, but it is still low maintance compared to some. I highly recommend the book!

http://www.sleepyplanet.com/

talks about tips and about how much sleep per 24 hrs age brackets kids should get.

Hi N.,

My name is K., I'm a first time Grandma and I hear and feel your pain. I want to encourage you with the fact, that it 'will' get better.....sometimes it just takes time, patience, perseverance and a 'very' good friend.

My suggestion to you is to connect with your Mother, Sister or Best Girlfriend and have them spend the night at your home, with the understanding that 'they' are your daughters ONLY caregiver that night....for the WHOLE night!

This will allow you to take a hot bath, drink some wonderful tea and go to bed and S-L-E-E-P!!! It is possible that your little lady knows that she currently has control of the night situation in your home and she is doing just that.....controlling your home. If she can't hear, see or smell you....you have a good chance of a great nights rest, while your precious buddy cares for your babe. (who will eventually fall asleep for her)

I think that this is worth a try....it will be good for your whole house. I'll be praying for you. If you ever have any additional questions /quandaries or just need to vent feel free to contact me @ ____@____.com
~K. T~

Several families I know, who have had the same problem, began using the CD "Sleep Loved One Sleep" to get their children to sleep, and it works beautifully. Once the children get used to it, they become conditioned to fall asleep quickly when they hear the CD. It also comes with a beautiful little book that is filled with positive sayings about the child.

You can check it out at www.lifeinharmony.biz

J. F.

What about giving her a piece of your clothing to sleep with that has your scent on it?

Could she possibly have an ear infection?

Hi N. - let me first start by saying that my child has NEVER had any sleep issues, but my Nanny's daughter does. I know it's hard, but she needs to learn to sleep on her own and that means that you have to let her cry until she does, even if it takes an hour. Every 15 minutes or so you can go in an reassure her that you're still here, but she ultimately has to sleep in her crib on her own. And, here's the hard part, you HAVE to be consistent! You can't just try it once in a while. For this to work, you HAVE to put her to bed at the same time every night for several days in a row and you just have to bear her crying until she gets that she can sleep on her own. Best of luck. I know this is hard, but you have to think about what's best for your baby.

Buy Dr. Ferber's book on the correct way to implement the crying it out method. It may take up to a week, but if you follow his advice your baby will be sleeping in her crib by herself and life will be much better for your entire household once everyone is getting a good night's sleep.

N.; yeah kids like to be held and nothing wrong with holding them but we got to live too, i would swaddle her, with a blanket so it still feels she is being held when you lay her down, put a few blankets between youand her and she wont feel it as much, but swaddling is just wrapping her up so she feels held, most kids are used the nice warm small space they had inthe womb, and now they are out in this large world and sometimes we just want to stay warm and cuddled, its ok , but swaddling does help, so try it and see how it works, D. s

As mean as it sounds, you're going to have to put her in her bed and let her cry it out. If she doesn't calm down after about ten minutes, go in and reassure her by giving her a hug and a kiss and rubbing her back but do NOT take her out of that bed. It may take a little while for her to fall asleep, but if you don't get her to sleep now, you'll have problems later on. Instead of using a fan, get an inexpensive CD player and a CD of soothing sounds, maybe nature sounds. My daughter likes the sound of waves crashing on the beach. Good luck and I hope you get some sleep!

N.-
You got a lot of great suggestions. I would add, take her to the pediatrician to make sure she doesn't have a medical issue with laying down. Ear issues or reflux could be part of the problem. How is she with naps? If she doesn't get enough day time sleep she will be overtired at night and have issues with that too. Good Luck!