Tax Time

If it is in your court agreement for you to claim her then keep it that way. As far as the extracurricular activities, you might be hitting a brick wall there. I wouldn't try to negotiate at this point because he hasn't been consistent in paying child support. What makes you think he will keep his word & pay for half of extracurricular stuff. At least now you can use what you get back from income tax to pay for your childs activites. You are better off leaving it the way it is.

Although this might be fair all in all - it depends on where the agreement is made. Is it an agreement that is in your divorce ageement - that is staped by a court?? If so, you might have a fight on your hands - that is unless you get a writting agreement that he will not claim her if he is behind.

I have known people that filed taxes and claimed their kids only to get audited and have to pay it back the money (plus fines & interest)because it wasn't their year and they filed against the divorce agreement. This would only happen if your ex also trys to also claim your kid, they question his return & he shows the divorce papers.

Also, why is he unemployed?? Is he getting unemployment?? If so, did you know that child support is to be coming out of his unemployment check just as it does an employers check. This might be something to look into. But personnaly - I would talk to a lawyer or the child support bureau before you claim your daughter against the agreement. If nothing else to get advice that would count.

But honestly - extra curricular activites are just that... EXTRA. Child support isn't for that, it is to cover the things needed to raise the child. If you choose to pay out $2500 for extra activites for your child, you need to pay for them... now if you both choose to get your child into and continue an activity, then I can see you wanting him to pay half. Just like if he chooses an activity for her to do and you don't - he should pay for it not you. There are tones for free activites you can get you kid into... I don't understand why you are paying out over $200 a month just to keep her active. I can understand why he doesn't want to pay.

One last note... my mom never was able to claim me on her taxes. It was always my dad's right to claim me and my older sister. Just as it is his right to claim my younger sister every year and not my ex-step-moms. And my mom & dad divorced when I was about 13 months old... he did let me claim myself when I was married at 17, but actually he even had the right to claim me after I got married cause he still paid my mom child support till I was 18 (which was to be forwared to me but never was). And yes, when he lost his job... he got behind, but still claimed us eventhough it took him about 8 mo to find a new job.

I think that is perfectly fair.

go by your divorce decree, if he wants to dispute it then he has to take you to court then you can go after him for the back child support. my decree stated i got to claim my daughter & my decree stated that my ex had to pay 1/2 of extra curricular activities ONLY if we both agreed on the activities, of course he never agreed so i got stuck paying for all of her extra curriculars, but oh well it was for her not him.....all of this court stuff really depends on how the judge is feeling that day.....never be intimidated by your ex or the courts....i took my ex to court for back support & to pay for 1/2 of college.....everyone told me i was wasting my time with asking for college but guess what i won & even more....my ex has to pay for 1/2 of college & the back support well i didnt know this but where i live they have to pay a penalty per month they are behind & the judge honored the penalty which totalled $600 more than the back child support....well 6 months late my ex lost his job so there went college but i got all the back child support! best wishes

My relatives have it in their custody agreement that Dad gets to claim the boy every other year. My relative was also out of work this year, and well, if he doesn't have money coming in, how can you expect him to pay you when he doesn't have anything?

As for extra-curricular activities, if the activity was discussed and agreed to, then yes, he should pay for half. If you enrolled the child without discussing it with the Dad, then no, Dad shouldn't have to pay half.

M.

He needs to be providing 50% of her care. Period. in order to claim her on his taxes. He can't just pay his court ordered child support and part of her extracurricular activities. He needs to pay for her clothes, shoes, food, shelter, lighting, etc. So unless visitation is split 50/50, he cannot legally claim her. A friend of mine went through this last year. Her ex claimed their daughter and he never even saw her. The IRS is going after him for child support and falsifying tax documents.

I would say whatever you're comfortable with if it's not in your divorce decree. If it's in your divorce decree, I would follow the rules. If he can still go out to dinner and do other things when he's not working, and not pay child support, then I WOULD NOT allow him to claim her because he doesn't deserve to. I also wouldn't allow him to claim her if you're providing anything above 70% of her care, including a home--her own separate room, utilities, food, clothes, lunch money, internet for her to do homework--very necessary, gas to take her to school, doctor appointments/medicine, etc. Some mothers might think it's petty to list those things, but none of that is a luxury; being a single parent on one income isn't easy and every $ comes in handy. I'm sure if you didn't need the child support, you'd probably not worry about whether he paid it or not. Even if he keeps her 2 weeks out of the year, that doesn't warrant him carrying her as a dependent because you provide a home with a room for her, whereas when she's with him for short periods of time, she probably sleeps on the sofa. I definitely wouldn't allow him to carry her if he's behind on child support and didn't bother to help in any kind of way while he wasn't working. That doesn't even need to be pondered. As far as the extracurricular activities, I wouldn't worry about him paying that. Getting the child support is all I would focus on. When she's old enough to understand and make decisions for herself, she'll appreciate all that you've done for her.

I can tell you from personal experience that if it's not in the divorce decree; she lives in your home the first 6 months of the year, and he carries her in addition to you carrying her, he will be in trouble with the IRS. My ex had a verbal agreement with his ex that he would carry one of their sons and she would carry one. Unknown to him, she carried them both and when the IRS caught up with them, WE had to pay $10k in taxes. For 7 years we never received a tax return. Before we were married, I received a return every year. Think long and hard before you make the decision. Don't allow him to carry her if you'll end up regretting it in the end, because once the forms have been filed there's no turning back. If it'll make you feel better, you can always share some of the money with him that you get back from the IRS.

My friend (male) is paying child support for his daughter. It is written into their plan that they get to alternate years for claiming her, UNLESS he is behind on his payments. Even if he owes her $5, he cannot legally claim her.
Since this isn't in your parenting plan, its pretty much up to you I suppose. Perhaps you could work out with him- he gets to claim her every other year but anything he owes you, you will get out of that?
It's completely your call and you should definitely go with what you're comfortable with. :)