Okay, so this may sound strange - or maybe it is more common than I think, but my almost 3 year old son has been fascinated with belly buttons lately and scours my catalogs for images of women or little girls in bathing suits. He also wants to be left alone - asking me to leave the room or goes upstairs and hides behind the big rocking chair to undress his Haba cloth boy doll. I ask him if he wants to be alone to poop (because he does that too) and when he says "no", I ask him if he wants to look at belly buttons. He looks me straight int he eye and gives me an emphatic "yes". So, he is honest about what he wants and isn't embarrassed to tell me WHAT he is doing, but is shy to have me SEE what he is doing. Does anyone have experience with this? My son is very verbal. He has been speaking 10+ word sentences (properly conjugated, mind you) since he was 2.5 years old. He is very intellectual already (and not as physical as a lot of other little boys he plays with). Is he just growing up faster than some? We are very open in our home. I nursed for over 2 years, he sees both his parents naked and we are not ashamed of our bodies and he runs around naked outside during good weather . Not sure where all this comes from. Any helpful ideas or suggestions? Should I just not worry about it?
Never had this kind of thing happen with my kids, but I remember that my brother and I both thought that Belly Buttons were hilarious. All my parents had to say was the word, and we would bust out laughing. It was how they kept us entertained in the car on long trips.
M.
<laughing> Aren't kids grand? They do the oddest things. I'm sure if you can manage to trace it it would all make perfect sense (like lifting up a shirt to see a belly button and getting told not to lift up shirts in public, or some offhand comment made by someone about a shirt being too short because you can see their navel, or a religious idea, or, or, or)... but until then, talk about a head scratcher!!
Have you tried asking?
I would not worry about it, either. My 3 1/2 year old recently became interested in my cleavage (once I figured out what he asking me when he pointed and said, "what's that hole, mommy?" over and over--I was in a nightgown). He seemed to think he "had a hole" too, and showed me his belly button. My almost 2 year old loves clothing catalogs and sits there flipping through Victoria's Secret pointing out "belly, belly, belly!" I'm not too worried. :)
sounds to me that he just has a fasination with belly buttons! boys are strange anyway( i have a 4 year old) that why it takes girls so long to like them! lol sounds like he's ok to me
Let me strongly recommend The Belly Button Book by Sandra Boynton. It's a delight, and will perhaps help keep the subject open and light, so that no shame issues build up around this little body part.
My 4.5 grandson loves to pull up shirts and blow big raspberries into family members' navels. His major fascination is boobs – he may never in his life get enough of them. We just handle this all very casually – I doubt it's anything to worry about.
Honestly, I can't imagine why anyone would worry about this. It's normal to be interested in bodies, looking at a doll or a catalogue isn't inappropriate, so I can't see why his asking for privacy about something is a problem. I think his curiosity is normal, and it's also normal when kids learn about privacy to "demand" some for themselves even if it isn't for something that needs to be a private activity. Don't give yourself any additional stress, this is not a sign of perversion or early puberty, he's a toddler
It is pretty normal for this age. A lot of little kids play "doctor" to find out what everyone has. I can remember this natural curiosity at that age. Everybody develops differently and my older kids are not physical and my younger son loves to be active. I would just treat this stage like any other stage and let him transition through it.
I feel like we're all sitting around the kitchen table with a cup of coffee...mostly because of what I am going to say...Could someone have told him what the belly button really is? That we are connected to mommy with it???
He could be articulating belly button when he means naked body but at three, I think you're probably okay.
I missed this stage only having girls!
God bless,
M.
I wouldn't worry about it. This just sounds like his idiosyncrasy. All babies (just as adults are) are different. This sounds rather sophisticated but not harmful. It's cute that he's honest about it.
Both of my grandchildren have been fascinated by belly buttons. They'd touch theirs and ours and say they're cute or comment on differences or ask to hear once more about how they were connected to mommy. My granddaughter has eczema and when I put lotion on her she usually says "not on my belly button" and then she rubs the lotion in on and around her belly button. To me it feels like her belly button is personal and something to be taken care of.
I do NOT mean anythiing perverted about this, but are you sure your son is only looking at belly buttons and not naked body parts. I would assume that at 3, he is now curious and aware that M. and dad are different, but ashamed to let you see him "explore" the difference. If its either, belly button OR other private, then he is just being curious george. If he is not being private about using the toilet, then he is not ashamed of that. I personally believe after kids become aware there is a difference with boy/girl, especially boys, that M. and dad shouldn't continue walking around naked in front of them. My son loves his naked body and belly button too, so I wouldn't worry about it.
Thanks everyone. Not offended at all! We find it funny, but I wanted to see if anyone else had a similar experience. There is no shame about body parts here. And, he knows about umbilical cords and what his belly button is. We had a homebirth and he has seen some photos. He does love skin - and skin to skin contact. I think he is exploring the intimate nature of skin and his own body too right now. We don't run around naked in front of him and I stopped taking baths with him at 2.5 years old. When we get dressed it's a quick underwear pulls up and then he really just sees my boobs - which after nursing over 2 years he's cool with and doesn't question much anymore. Daddy doesn't get dressed in front of him much. Your answers all resonate - so thank you very much. We'll just roll with it!
My daughter is fascinated with hair. All kinds of hair. When we go out in public she'll ask people she doesn't know if she can pet their hair. She especially loves buzzed mens heads with a small growth. She will pet them and squeal that it tickles and reach back for more. She'll run up to anyone and ask very loudly in a crowded place if she sees hair that she wants to touch, "CAN I PET YOUR HAIR?!?" It's just so freaking weird! She'll even tickle your eyebrows if you stay still long enough. She's almost four now and I'm trying to impart to her the difference between family and strangers because right now she tells everyone "I love you! See you later!" when parting and wants to hug, kiss and touch everyone she meets.
Kids all have their "thing" and I'm sure he'll grow out of it. Just the other day we had the plumbers over to fix our toilet and Chloe stood back and said very loudly, "Mom those are strangers!" Then softer, "I'm not supposed to pet their hair..." Then loud again, "Can I give them a kiss?"
Another facepalm moment, brought to you by my kid.
How cute is that!!! There are a couple of books out there about belly buttons. I have the Belly Button book by Sandra Boynton -- BEBO!!! Apparently this is not an unusual thing if they have children's books about them. Buy the books for your son and I'm sure he'll be over the moon, but buy them soon because kids' fascinations don't last long.
Hello D., As the mother of 5 ,with children all over te page for emotional needs and privacy. I can say that we were a bit more modest in our thinking but your little one is perfectly normal.
I have a little one that will wear shirt or shoes not at the same time yet will never let someone in the bathroom while they go poop becasue it is embarassing . They may make body noises, hear a splash when it hits the water etc. at the same time a 3 y/o may need you to help wipe tier bottoms. I have to say why would you want to have to see what he is doing? there are just somethings we need to do alone. Since you are so open about your bodies and its perfectly ok to have your child nude then why are you surprisedd that he is curious about somepart that is strange on people like the belly button? Some are in and some are out, some are strange to see. Even on cabbage patch dolls they were one of the differences to make them special.
I need to say that many children that are little children mailnly around adults become very adult in their speech and actions often having a hard time with other children because of the different communication skills tey may have- some parents talk baby talk and others talk! Sounds like you are aware that your child is getting to a place where privacy is more important and that honest questions and answers are going to be needed.
Thanks for posting this question. My son is 3.5yrs and likes to undress dolls. He has asked for a "Naked Dolly" for Christmas. Recently he grabbed the VS catalog ofthe counter asnd was looking it over. I was not sure how to feel about that, and since it was nearing bedtime I told me to put it on the counter, but he wanted to take it with us. When I took the catalog from him so that we could go up to the tub, he had that look that he was going to start crying. I'm not sure how to perceive this behaviour/fasanation with nakedness and women at such an early age.
