Following Our Own Advice To Our Kids Might Actually Help Us
Problems are everywhere. You talk to anyone and surely they are in the middle of some difficult issue in their lives, a tough decision they need to make, or a tough change must be implemented, etc. No matter what your status is in life you cannot escape the turning of the ‘wheel of fortune’. Some days will be easy, some days will be like walking in peanut butter.
I had a very tough week this week. Every turn I made seemed to create a larger negative affect. The more I tried to dig myself out of my funk the more I seemed to drown in it. I was trying desperately to go back to homeostasis yet the more I tried the more I drowned in discomfort. While going through this, I reached out several times to my trusty Buddhist philosophy. In Buddhism you are encouraged to be with the discomfort and not fight it. Pain and discomfort is seen as mere balls of energy going through a predictable path, a path that will evade and fade away. Instead of utilizing valuable energy trying to make it all just go away, I should have just sat with it and allowed my toughs to settle and allowed my mind to see my problems for what they were; nothing.
In retrospect, It’s obvious that I have a lot of work to do implementing the teachings of the Buddha for I still react no different than my kids do in times of stress. I have two young kids, ages 3 and 6. Every once in a while (or more frequently) they argue about very absurd things. Absurd to me of course. Obviously, to them, what they argue over is so important and seemingly central to their survival here on earth that it must be resolved that very moment. The grand dramatics around their arguments is so intense and so fierce that a neighbor might just think they are being beaten to a pulp. Yes, all this ruckus over maybe a wooden block of which we have dozens of, or some other insignificant item that was on its way to the trash perhaps. But in analyzing my own actions this week, I too am trying so hard to not feel the discomfort that I make it twice as difficult to get out of the discomfort. I should at these times take to heart the advice I offer my kids and 1. have them “take a deep breath”, and to 2. “think about how just a few minutes ago you were fine and you could not possibly be dying”.
Miriam Cutelis is a busy, multitasking mom attempting to live a creative life, living in this moment NOW and valuing her own life journey while also remaining involved with the world. “So many people have come to my life and inspired me that I feel the need to so the same… why not? Everyone has a story to tell… and this one is mine.”
