Worried About My Daughter's Weight

Hi A.,
The YMCA or YWCA is a great idea but if you’re not ready for that do what my family does – We go for a long walk after dinner (every night). We always take something with us like a ball or Frisbee my son will sometimes take his bike or scooter and we always end up making the walk into something more like a game of football or soccer. We try to mix it up so it never gets boring and it’s really great family time. Even when I’m really tired a good walk always wakes me up and I feel ready to take on the rest of the evening. We also have a membership to a local hotel that has a really nice outdoor/ indoor pool which allows us to go swimming year round and it has a little gym for a quick workout while my son and husband are in the pool. A lot of hotels have family memberships and it’s sometimes a cheaper alternative to gyms.
One thing that my mom always says “the family that plays together stays together”

A.,
My daugther is also 8 years old and 4 1/2 feet. At her 7 year well visit, she was exactly 4 feet and weighed 69 pounds. In the past year, she grew 6 inches and actually lost four pounds. Some of the things that helped were changing her diet, not to any extreme, and increasing the physical activites.

Joining the YMCA was a great decision. Now, every Sunday we go swimming as a family and I try to get the kids there during the week. She takes one class a session, usually gymnastics. She is now taking basketball which is great because she practices once a week and has a game once a week. They have Friday night activites for the kids which are free with the membership. They swim, play games and go on the moonbounce. Also, they have free exercise classes for the family. As far as paying for the activities, my mother would much rather pay for a session of basketball or gymnastics than buy her a toy for her birthday or Christmas. I have also convinced my mother-in-law that gift certificates to the Y are great gifts for the kids.

Also, I have started really considering what gifts my children receieve for Christmas and birthdays. I try to buy them toys and games that require physical acitivity. Last year, whenever anyone asked what to get them for their birthdays I asked for gift cards to Toy R Us. When I had enough, we went and bought a moonbounce for them. I actually set it up in my house on rainy and cold days. We also have a pull-up bar in the door way that has a swing and acrobat bar that attaches. The kids love it. For Christmas this year, my mother went in with me on tumbling mats, a balance beam and incline for the kids. I also keep a list of things that I want for them so that when relatives ask for suggestions, I can steer them in the direction of physical toys. Oh yes, the dance mat that plugs into the TV is a big thing that my kids are getting for Christmas too.

The other thing that has helped with all three of my kids was taking the TV out of the playroom. Now, if they want to watch TV they have to go in another room. I don't allow toys out of the playroom. This has limited the amount of TV viewing so much.

I hope this is helpful. I am sorry if it is too long, I write like I speak.
-Barbara

How about dance or karate? My daughter does both and absolutely loves them.

Try JustFitnessForKids. It's in Manassas. It's exactly set up precisely for children with weight problems, but kids love it. My son is 56 inches tall and 85 pounds and I'd have him in it if we could afford it (it's about $100 a month). Kids really love it.

Also, for you, I know this will sound strange but what about Tae Kwon Do? I started when I was 37 and now I have a black belt. You don't have to be athletic to do it. There is lots of stretching so you get flexible, and aerobics, and it's weight-bearing so it's good for your bones. And if your child wants to do it, there are whole families in the dojang that do tae kwon do together. They have classes that start after dinner time, and what's nice is, every time you get a new belt you can see your progress.

Hi A.!
I could have been your daughter, not as tall, but when I was in 4th grade I was 5'2 and 120lbs.....I was the chunky chick with glasses and short hair. NOW I am not that person, still feel like it sometimes though.

One thing.....is your daughter solid meat and muscle? Growing up, I was very active.....was a cheerleader for football and basket ball, played softball, was very active in everything, a big ole tomboy and there was NO WAY I could be any smaller.....it was all in the way I was built. Still that way today. I can't break 160 lbs since i had my son 9 yrs ago. But I am solid....not always happy, but accepting of my bone structure.

As was already mentioned about the eating more meals, but picking them, I whole heartedly agree. What do we do as adults when we want a small snack? Eat. What do we do as aadults when we can't eat when we are hungry? Go on over load and act liek there is no tomorrow at the dinner table. Let go of the "formal" rules of eating 3 square meals a day....(I still argue with myself about it being non-traditional as to what I grew up with)But it works wonders on moods and temperments as well.

As far as being active.....I have a sweating to the oldies tape that my kids and I dance to when ever the mood strikes. Sometimes like now, aaround the holidays, to burn off calories and to get rid of the "excitablitlity" we pop the tape in and dance away. Or I blast the radio and we dance around the house where ever we go......

I know what you mean abotu all the fees. I only work part time, plus we don't hav enything around here like a gym or a YMCA or anything, so we have to improvise.
Good luck. And don't worry too much, when puberty hits, it may be in the cards for her to slim down a bit, that's what I did.
Take Care

I would actually suggest that if you can't afford the fees with sports then go to the afterschool programs. Many times now we as parents stretch our kids too thin and that is when the school problems develop. My suggestion to ease your fear would be to let her know that her school work needs to come first. She is 8 and it would be good for her socially and intellectually to become involved in something, maybe like dance or something would be good too. A lot of times if you look around you can find reasonable classes.

I'd just like to second (third?) the idea of joining the YMCA/YWCA. You can work in classes to fit your schedule and pull out anytime with no problem. And maybe you can sit in the whirlpool or take a class yourself while the kids are doing their thing! It was a great investment for us, and we're not even the "athletic" types, kwim?

Why not go for family walks or jogs in the evening. Make it a point to do something healthy and active as a family, that shouldn't affect school work. also start eating healthier meals with smaller portions, often doing that alone will do wonders :)

Hi A.,

Your plate is definitely full but I think you realize that you have to model this behavior. I also think its great not to push the competitive sports and to 'force' her to participate (I recall as a kid friend's mothers doing that and I was horrified). Some people had good suggestions like taking a walk after dinner. I found, too, that I needed to get more active in order to motivate my now 3.5 year old (when he was 2.5 believe it or not he preferred to play quietly or read rather than go to the park!). This is what I did (keep in mind that it took aobut 6 months to instill a change): I began by preparing dinners in advance and freeze them so that I only had to cook a few nights a week as opposed to ALL nights a week (so that give you some time). Also sometimes I even prepared, the night before, a picnic basket and we would go to the park and play ball and then eat. I made most of the changes, however, on the weekends. Each weekend we would do something physical whether it was family swimming or hiking together or just going to the park to play soccer. In the winter we ice skate together. Now my son is more active as a result and Im currently looking to put him in a 'formal' program like soccer. Good luck in finding something that works for all of you!

You have many excuses for the reasons why you cannot help your daughter in getting fit. It is very easy...First, get all the white bread, potato chips and anything with a alot of sugar out of the house. Plan more nutritious meals with lots of vegies, salads, meats, chicken, fish, Limit the pasta to once a week and have a weekend a couple times a month where the family goes out to a nice dinner which would be including desert. You always have to reward yourself when you are eating healthy and excersing. Sports are a great ideal for your daughter. Most schools have sports that are free to join...She can run track, do cheer leading, softball, soccor amd many more. So don't make excuses and find out more infomation to get your daughter on the go. Good Bless....

You could try the YMCA. They often have several programs available for kids and it usually only involves paying a membership fee to the YMCA itself. If you can try a swimming activity. It something that your whole family can enjoy together and its one of the easiest ways to stay in shape.

Hi A.,
I am sort of in the same boat with you. I have a 6 and 1/2 year-old daughter who is overweight. She is 4 feet tall and weighs 70 lbs. I make sure to have healthy foods available and we get outside to exercise whenever the weather permits. However, it doesn't seem tobe making a difference. My mother tells me to stop worrying about it, but I am. I mean, society is cruel to overweight people, and I don't want my daughter to have to deal with that. I know what you mean about not wanting to try out lots of sports and activities. Fortunately, my daughter loves to swim. She takes lessons and has so much fun. I think the water makes her feel bouyant and she doesn't get as winded as she would with soccer, softball, basketball, etc. Maybe your daughter would something like that. BTW, my daughter doesn't even know she is overweight (I discuss it with her doctor when she is in the waiting room), and right now I focus on boosting her general self-esteem. The most important thing is that your daughter feels special and loved, and obviously she is since you wrote asking for advice.

Hi A., my name is M.. I have 2 wonderful children. My daughter is 7 at about 51 inches and 85 pounds, my son is almost 3 at about 38 inches and 45 pounds. I am in the same situation with my daughter. I spoke to the peditrican and they recommended me to a nutrisionist in CHOP. The nut. told me if she is hungry let her eat seven times a day if she chooses, but you choose what she eats. This is new so we are not to far into it, but it seems to be working. Don't get me wrong I pick and choose my battles with her. I also can't afford much more time or money in a gym. There isn't enough hours in a day and between work, school, activities, house, and a toddler I have devised a plan that works for my family. I also am not in any type of shape. In the morning before school my daughter has to walk to dog with me and the baby. After school, I make it a purpose to forget something small and have to walk to a store and she comes with me. After dinner we try to walk the dog again and have time for me and her to be alone and talk. Then at night I try to play simple games such as tag or hide and seek or we play a game called dance dance on playstation. Good luck, let me know how you make out.